A woman was in bed with her lover when she heard her husband opening the front door. "Hurry," she said, "stand in the corner." She rubbed baby oil all over him, then dusted him with talcum powder. "Don't move until I tell you," she said, "pretend you're a statue."
"What's this?" the husband inquired as he entered the room.
"Oh it's a statue," she replied, "the Smiths bought one and I liked it so I got one for us, too." No more was said, not even when they went to bed.
Around 2am the husband got up, went to the kitchen and returned with a sandwich and a beer. "Here," he said to the statue, "have this. I stood like that for two days at the Smiths and nobody offered me a damned thing."
2007-04-05 04:18:47 · 13 answers · asked by Atheism itself is your best shot at heaven !! 7 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
4th Affair...Didnt post 1st time for some reason
A mortician was working late one night. He examined the body of Mr. Schwartz, about to be cremated, and made a startling discovery. Schwartz had the largest private part he had ever seen!
"I'm sorry Mr. Schwartz," the mortician commented, "I can't allow you to be cremated with such an impressive private part. It must be saved for posterity."
So, he removed it, stuffed it into his briefcase, and took it home. "I have something to show you you won't believe," he said to his wife, opening his briefcase. "My God!" the wife exclaimed, "Schwartz is dead!"
2007-04-05 04:32:30 · update #1
You have really cute jokes.
2007-04-05 04:33:47 · answer #1 · answered by Aunt Henny Penny 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hahahahahahahahahahahaha, both VERY funny!
2007-04-05 12:36:43 · answer #2 · answered by ♥ME♥ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
both are very funny
laugh out loud
2007-04-05 11:37:00 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
very funny......but what happened to 4th affair?
2007-04-05 11:26:07 · answer #4 · answered by solver 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
very funny!
2007-04-05 11:43:39 · answer #5 · answered by just me 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
very good
2007-04-05 11:51:35 · answer #6 · answered by jazyjaz05 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
funny one!
2007-04-05 11:24:24 · answer #7 · answered by Jim G 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
oh, oh, lol
2007-04-05 13:43:47 · answer #8 · answered by This, That & such 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OK
2007-04-05 11:24:13 · answer #9 · answered by bkbarile 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
roflmao!!!!!!!!!!!
2007-04-05 12:19:00 · answer #10 · answered by x yasmine x 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋