PLEASE HELP ME (ImPORTANT!)?

Question

I'm very confused at the moment. I have a girlfriend she's a junior in high school and I'm a senior. I've been dating her since she was a freshman. I love her I really do but I'm VERY confused with my feelings right now.

She's perfect at times but at time's she's ....well...not? We have had a lot of arguments lately and I'm going away to college next year she'll be staying here. I went to visit my college and met another girl who is very attractive. I talk to her through IM every once in a blue moon. We only say "HI" It's nothing more then that. She lives about 5 hours away from me at the current moment.

I'm concerned because lately i almost feel like I don't want to be "tied down" I don't want to be in a relationship. I feel like my girlfriend is one of my best friends and our whole relationship has been more of a "best friends" type of thing but with sex. I enjoy going out on dates and taking girls out...many of times she'll say "I don't want to" or "can't we just stay here?"

I mean there are times we go out. I took her to the amusement park this week because we are both on spring break. I just feel like there's times when I'm just BORED with her. She's always VERY SHY and just kind-of blah...She smokes pot pretty often so I'm not sure if that has anything to do with it or not. She sleeps A LOT more then most girls and i just sort-of feel like i need more.

This feeling is like an all of a sudden feeling. I'm not sure if it will go away with time or if it's just always going to be there? I love her I don't want to hurt her. She is a really nice girl I'm just confused.

I literally started feeling this way about 3 days ago.

IS THIS NORMAL?? WHAT DOES IT ALL MEAN?

AND WHY WOULD I FEEL THIS WAY ALL OF A SUDDEN?

Answer 1

Totally normal. You're about to enter a completely different phase of your life. And, let me tell you, high school and college are two different worlds. Romantic relationships in high school rarely last through the first semester of college. I know it's hard and she will be hurt, but you should probably break it off before you go. You're young and have a lot of life ahead of you. Be free.

Answer 2

This is the normal feelings of teenagers. This is why everyone says to wait until you're in your 20's to become serious. You're growing and learning about life right now and the more you learn and become mature, the more you'll change your mind and views on life. Things that are important to a 10 year old boy, like frogs and tree forts are forgotten at 16. Then it's girls and cars. At 19 it'll still be girls and cars but you'll be interested in becoming an adult and going to college. Your mind will open up and you'll learn so much. If she's using drugs she will sleep and be boring, as you are finding. She doesn't have the drive to explore anything interesting and you SHOULD be bored. You are very normal. If I were your Mom, I'd tell you to go to college single and stay single for the first year. Make friends, go out on dates and concentrate on learning and growing. But don't get too involved. Easier said than done...LOL!!!! College should be fun and if you have a gf waiting at home, you'll be tied to her.
Good luck!!

Answer 3

It's normal and it seems like your relationship is on the downside, possibly never to come back up. If you're not 100% happy you'll start to nit pick about anything and everything she does. This is your way of trying to justify your feelings. Don't blame her, simply put, you're not meant for each other. It's nothing personal to either of you. Given that you are going away to college, I feel like you should be free and not tied down. You're still young, enjoy your freedom. How you should tell your girlfriend is another story, just be honest and try not to put her down. Don't go into the discussion saying "you do this and you do that". Maybe the both of you just need some time apart to sort your feelings out.

Answer 4

i think you guys should break up. Your going to college soon and your going to move on to other girls, perhaps the one that your talking to over IM. If your bored with your girlfriend then it's going to end sooner or later so you should just do it while you have another girl interested. And since you don't feel like being tied down being in a relationship (with someone you get bored with) probably isn't a good thing right now. So break up with your girlfriend and talk to the other girl on IM (not right after you break it off that would be very mean!)

Answer 5

You are getting ready to go into a new stage of your life, and maybe it's true that you have figured out that there's more out there. Your gf, on the other hand, still has a year of high school to finish, and honestly, we have all seen enough proof that bad things happen to a relationship when the separation happens in this type of situation. In my opinion, you should break up with her, but try to save the friendship. It would be so much less painful for the both of you to do it now, before you leave. You are both young and need to explore before you make a big decision about who you want to be with. And the comment about not blaming her with this and that.....that's really good advice.

Answer 6

You are maturing and she's not. You need to gently tell her its not going to work out because of you going to college next year. You don't want to worry about having your girl back home, and you probably will end up hurting her more if you do stay with her when you go off to college. I think you have this "all of a sudden" feeling because you realized that there is more out there in the world than just her. Go for it, enjoy life!

Answer 7

the good girls tend to get boring... but think about it do you really want to throw something beautiful away because at the moment you are confused? really, it seems that you are going off to college and want freedom from responsibility to anyone person. you may just regret that decision!!! stick it out. you can have lots of fun anyways. there are a lot of cool things to do without having to date, drink, and sleep around.sorry for being so blunt. i have just been a wittness to the same situation with many friends. i am 22 in college with one man, getting ready to get married(never thought that would happen) i just stuck it out when times were tough and even when the excitement ran out. you just need to find ways to bring it back. it can happen. remember it will get boring after a while with anyone!!! STICK IT OUT BUDDY!!! you'll find in the long run it was the right decision, especially being you two are able to be bestfriends. that's rare!

Answer 8

You need to talk to her and tell her how you feel. I am not going to sugarcoat it for you.....it will hurt her. But, if you are honest with her and say how you feel, she will respect you in the end.

There is nothing wrong with taking a break from eachother while you go to school. You are young and will be off to college soon....which will be a totally life changing experience. She may not understand it at first, but she will next year when it is her turn.

If it is meant to be, the two of you will find your way back to eachother.

Simple as that.

Answer 9

It sounds like your just bored with her. The pot issue has to go though since she will probably not have any ambition to do anything with her life. If you love her that is great but when the distance comes into play the relationship may not last. I think it is time to move on and do different things, nothing is more expensive than regret.

Answer 10

Yes it is normal...I have had the same feeling it is just that you some times second guess your self or think other wise what you are doing about the relationship. From what i can tell you love her to death and want to be with her but im guessing you must be stressed out about something esle that is causing this to happen to you. Everything should go well with you to i have been there and it just makes me realize how much she is to me stick it through you will love her that much more!!!