how can you say that to him without him leaving or becoming distant, and cheating on you?
2007-04-04 19:24:41 · 27 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
If your boyfriend truly loves you and understands you,he should respect your decision on not wanting to have sex.If he would force you into having sex it would be clear that he all he wanted was sex.If he cheated on you it means that he doesnt love you that much and is not into you and the relationship.
If the guy really loves you and cares for you he should respect your decision.
2007-04-04 19:35:48 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your boyfriend is not really your "friend" if he wants you to have sex with him before he has promised you a committment. If after you tell him you are not going to have sex with him, he becomes distant, leaves or cheats on you, he would have done that even if you had sex with him because he was seeking sexual encounters instead of a social relationship. Then you will feel used instead of empowered. Sex does not last. Friendship does last.
Therefore, if all he wants from you is sex, YOU should be the one leaving, becoming distant from him and looking for a real relationship elsewhere.
2007-04-05 02:35:05 · answer #2 · answered by Jess4rsake 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I've been in this situation b4. I drop my so called bf cause he asked to have sex b4 marriage. He wan to know whether we are compatible or not in the sack. Funny request isn't it ? Well, i told him NOPE, i won't sleep with him for the sake of that. He mention engagement straight after he found out that we are compatible in the sack. I told him, sex is just another deeper loving commitment to each other and it's not the basic items in a relationship. Anyway, he did not compromise, so we broke off with the relationship.
Therefore, my advice to you. Stick to what you believed in, as you cannot do much after you have sex with the guy name bf. U can only have regrets later on. If your current bf cannot accept the situation, then too bad for him. U just be strong and let go of him, instead of forcing yourself to go to bed with him.
2007-04-05 02:44:31 · answer #3 · answered by stormymy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think there's a good way of telling a guy that you don't want to have sex with him, without him being distant, unless he really loves you. If he's not willing to respect your feelings then he's no good for you anyway. I hope it all works out in your favour
2007-04-05 02:31:25 · answer #4 · answered by Maire 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
How about just explaining that you love him, it's not that you don't find him attractive, but you don't feel like having sex and you'd like to slow down.
If he truly loves you, he will give it a chance - I can't say he'll wait forever, but he should give you a chance to find out why you don't want to have sex and maybe change your mind with time. If he's only there for the sex then he probably won't stay and you'll know that you didn't want to be with him anyway.
2007-04-05 02:29:50 · answer #5 · answered by virgo82676 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Sorry but that is one of the biggest reasons he is with you,many of women had to do what they didn't feel like doing in order to keep your husband or boyfriend happy.Most women don't get the sex thing to most it is only sex we can take it or leave it and in a lot of cases we prefer to leave it.Sorry guys that is just the way it is.
2007-04-05 02:35:39 · answer #6 · answered by Teenie 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You say it.
If he feels that he has to leave you or find sex elsewhere, then sorry to say, he's not in it for you. He's in the relationship because he wants sex. Yes, despite all of those romantic movies, there are guys out there who are like that.
But sex isn't something to toy around with. Don't beat around the bush, don't make excuses for yourself or him. Say it and say it boldly. It's better for you in the long run.
2007-04-05 02:28:21 · answer #7 · answered by Ryan B 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Be honest. The truth is, if you don't want to have sex with him and that's all he wants, he's going to leave anyways. If he does care about you, though, he'll respect the fact that you don't want to have sex. You're better off being honest than making any uncomfortable sacrifices.
2007-04-05 02:28:58 · answer #8 · answered by Dan 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Tell him you are saving yourself for your husband. Tell him if he's the one, then an engagement ring, a wedding, and a nice honeymoon will convince him that waiting to have sex was worth the wait! Many don't wait and there children strongly object later on. . . .
2007-04-05 02:32:44 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
simply a gentle no, your boyfriend should respect your decision.
I'm distancing himself, or cheating is just an immature gesture, or sulking.
But if u do say no, &still pay attention to him, like buying his favourite food, watching his favorite program etc it ought to soften him, or let him know u dont want sex, but u still love him, care for him, &are interested in him.
2007-04-05 02:43:43 · answer #10 · answered by Phoenix21 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋