Who's your favorite comedian??

Question

Eh? Mine's Emo Philips

Answer 1

Some may not care for his monotone delivery, but Steven Wright is Comic genus,
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On the other hand, you have different fingers. -- Steven Wright

I was sad because I had no shoes, until I met a man who had no feet. So I said, "Got any shoes you're not using?" -- Steven Wright

My theory of evolution is that Darwin was adopted. -- Steven Wright

Someone sent me a postcard picture of the earth.
On the back it said, "Wish you were here."
-- Steven Wright

Cross country skiing is great if you live in a small country.
-- Steven Wright

I spilled spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone. -- Steven Wright

"Did you sleep well?" "No, I made a couple of mistakes." -- Steven Wright

My dental hygienist is cute. Every time I visit, I eat a whole package of Oreo cookies while waiting in the lobby. Sometimes she has to cancel the rest of the afternoon's appointments. -- Steven Wright

Officer, I know I was going faster than 55MPH, but I wasn't going to be on the road an hour. -- Steven Wright

I have two very rare photographs.
One is a picture of Houdini locking his keys in his car.
The other is a rare photograph of Norman Rockwell beating up a child.
-- Steven Wright

I stayed up all night playing poker with tarot cards.
I got a full house and four people died.
-- Steven Wright

I used to work in a fire hydrant factory.
You couldn't park anywhere near the place.
-- Steven Wright

I went to the museum where they had all the heads and arms from the statues that are in all the other museums. -- Steven Wright

It's a small world, but I wouldn't want to have to paint it.
-- Steven Wright

Right now I'm having amnesia and deja vu at the same time.
-- Steven Wright

Answer 2

Emo Phillips is great.
I like Jim Gaffigan, Demetri Martin, Ron White and Eddie Izzard.

Answer 3

Chris Rock, Ron White, Carlos Mancia.

Answer 4

Jim Carrey, Bill Engvall, Chris Farley

Answer 5

George Bush

Answer 6

Jerry Sienfeild

Answer 7

Jerry Lewis

Answer 8

Brian Regan

Answer 9

Chris Rock!

Answer 10

Chris Rock and Monique