Ok well it is spring break and I was away for 3 days in Virginia this is one of 3 vacations I will take this year. I have to go with my family because I am only 15. We own a condo renting bussiness in Ocean City and we often have to go down to clean and renevate the condos. There is a problem, though, my boyfriend gets mad at me for going away. He says I am spoiled for going away so much but I have no control over what my family does. I tell him the condo bussiness is something the whole family has to help with and he says he understands. But then he just gets mad at me every time I go away. I know he misses me when I leave but we still constantly talk on the phone. We get into fights about this. What should I do?
2007-04-04 08:59:58 · 36 answers · asked by Lindsey G 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Dear Lindsey:
You have got to tell your beay that enough is enough. When you are 17 or 18 or maybe even 16, your parents MIGHT trust you enough to leave you at home, but until then, it's not your choice. The next time he acts up or starts calling you spoiled or whatever, stop him right in his tracks. Tell him calmly, but FIRMLY, to KNOCK IT OFF. You have no choice in the matter. There is NO POINT in him bitching because you HAVE to go (unless you can find a friend to stay with; is that a possible option for you?) and until you are either A) Old enough to be elft home alone for a few days, or B) Find someone that your parents will let you stay with, he is BUMMING. Let him know that your tired of being verbally thrashed for something beyond your own control & him repeating the same temper-tantrum over & over is just going to piss you off more. Let him know you'll see what you can do to arrange to stay w/ a friend next time round, but in the mean-time, the beau has got to suck it up & grow up. God Forbid you're gone 10 days out of the year; He might just wither & blow away like dust in the wind. Again, acknowledge that he misses you & you miss him. But don't tolerate the yelling or fights. End them the second they start; tell him to stop, or just hang up the phone/ walk away. He'll get the point quickly enough.
2007-04-04 09:09:33 · answer #1 · answered by Spiral_Dancer 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
How do you feel about your boyfriend? If you have any strong feelings for the guy, you are not going to like me calling your boyfriend a straight up idiot. Doesn't he know that since you are only 15 years old that your parents can take you anywhere in the world they want to take you and there isn't a thing he can say or do about it? Until you are over the age of 18 and can be legally emancipated from your parents, that is the way it is.
If he can't understand that you will be back, then you really need to seriously think about getting rid of this guy. If he is 15 or 16, how does one get to be possessive like that? This should serve as a red flag in how he deals with being apart from others.
2007-04-04 09:07:56 · answer #2 · answered by davester1970 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, it could be that he does in fact miss you while you are away, but I'll bet my bottom dollar that he doesn't want you going away because of jealousy. He probably thinks that you'll find a better, hotter guy in Virginia and will hit things off with him and completely forget about the man back home. Assure him before you leave that you will be thinking of him constantly while you are gone and that you will miss him very much. If he still gets angry, dump him for a guy who will let you have a life and not be so jealous! <3
2007-04-04 09:07:27 · answer #3 · answered by The Prep 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
break up with him and find a guy that doesn't suck.
Little boys like that are stupid and you shouldn't put up with it.
If he says he understands and still acts like a jerk then he is just a jerk that you shouldn't call your boyfriend.
His mother probably treats him like a baby and gives him everything he wants when he wants it because he throws a temper.
Seriously tell that kid to grow up or get out of your hair cause that's immature and not even a good reason to be mad at someone you are supposed to be in a relationship with.
If you let him continue it will just get worse, and before long he will be yelling at you for going to spend the night at your friends house.
2007-04-04 09:08:51 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is controlling and jealous and probably doesn't trust you. You are 15 and you dont need to find out the hard way that guys like that only get worse. You do what you gotta do and no boy/man should tell you you cant or you are wrong. It is understandable that he will miss you but what your family does is your business.
My suggestion is get a new boyfriend. You arent going to marry your boyfriend now any way. You are too young.
2007-04-04 09:05:23 · answer #5 · answered by xxkittenluvxx143 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If he's that self-centred and bad tempered now about you having to help your family for a few days a year, just imagine how much worse he'll get if you ever move in with him down the road. You may find yourself never allowed to set foot out of the house except to work. This boy is extremely controlling and at this young an age it's only starting. I would just end it with him and find someone who is supportive of you.
2007-04-04 09:03:37 · answer #6 · answered by charmedchiclet 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You need to tell your boyfriend that your family is planning theses things not you! He should be happy but instead he is acting jealous and thats not what a boyfriend should do.
You need to have a serious talk and tell him he can not keep getting mad at you other wise your relationship is going to suffer. explain you are 15 not 18. you cant control what vactions you go on. Explain this is something he has to come to terms with otherwise it is just going to make you relationshiop more complicated than it needs to be.
2007-04-04 09:04:51 · answer #7 · answered by Irishbeauty 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are going with a control freak. Exactly what is it he expects you to do, being you are fifteen, and the fact you still live at home? He needs to do an awful lot of growing up. He is the one who is behaving spoiled. He sounds jealous. Guys like him turn into abusive boyfriends, then husbands. You will have to watch him for abusive behavior.
2007-04-04 09:04:04 · answer #8 · answered by Sparkles 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He is being controlling. You need to nip this in the bud before it gets worse.
He should be able to handle you leaving for 3 days at a time. My hubby goes out of town for work, 2 weeks at a time and I go for a week at a time. We miss each other, but we understand.
Good Luck!
2007-04-04 09:04:09 · answer #9 · answered by Jo 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Tell him that this is a part of you he has to accept. If he respects you, then this wouldn't be an issue of being spoiled. You are lucky to go on vacation, it's fun and exciting to travel and learn. This should be a sign of a major controll freak! Your still young, date lots of boys and one day you will find charming who respects you as you wish.
2007-04-04 09:09:20 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋