Divorce or annulment and Christianity?

Question

I'm getting mixed answers...I'm told it's wrong for me to get a divorce, but I'm also told it is wrong for me to leave myself and my child in a verbally and emotionally abusive situation. I'm feeling a little stuck right now, and I only want to do what is right. If I was Catholic, I was told I might be able to get an annulment, but is that really any different in the meaning behind it?

Answer 1

I went thru the same thing when I was thinking of leaving my marriage..
so many people had so many ideas but a pastor finally looked at me one day and said

"God wants you happy, he did not put you or anyone on this earth to suffer. yes he wants your marriage to work but if there is abuse to you think he would want you and your children to suffer" He then said to me "no, he would not"

You and your kids deserve to be happy and God knows what you are going thru, he understands that you have tried..
as for getting married again.. if the time comes and you find someone who makes you and yours happy then yes get married again.. god did not put us here to be alone or lonely to hurt and be in pain.. he wants you happy and there is no reason you should stay with a person who abuses you..
God is all forgiving and if you think he will not forgive you leaving you are wrong.. if you feel the need to ask for forgivness then do so and he will. if that will help you.. but in the end you have nothing to be forgiven for it is not you who is abusing but you who is being abused..

I say let go and be happy God will understand..

There is a great book I read a long time ago and it touched on this subject if I can find it I will send you the title it was given to me by my doctor and it was a great help..

Answer 2

Others besides Catholics are able to get annulments, but they are sometimes difficult to get. An annulment is different from a divorce. If an annulment is granted, it is as if the marraige never took place legally. A divorce shows that a marriage happened and was ended. Annulments are usually only granted at the beginnings of a marriage or if proof can be given that the marraige was never properly consummated. Although I think people rush into divorce too quickly nowadays, if you are truly in an environment that is dangerous either phsically or mentally to you or your child and you do not think it can or will change, get a divorce.

Answer 3

First of all....get a legal separation, and get yourself and your child safely away from this abusive situation.
A divorce and an annulment are different creatures. Divorce is a legal and physical separation of two married people. The Catholic Church will grant an annulment after "counseling" and deciding whether or not the marriage "quallifies" for an annulment. Don't put this in someone else's hands.
Do not wait.......go for the big "D".....and I don't mean Dallas

Answer 4

Well first are u catholic, cause yes you can try to get annulment but its a lengthy process, this is that in the eyes of the church the marriage never happened. Now in other religions its frowned upon but still if you and your child is in an emotional and verbal abusive relationship get out. Dont stay you need to do it not only for yourself but your child. Please get out. The church doesnt see whats going on at home you and ur child does

Answer 5

The bottom line is annulment is the same as a divorce except without the legal court battle.

I am a christian, but there was nothing that I could do to save my marriage. I felt guilty for getting a divorce, but really didn't have a say so in the matter. At some point you learn to forgive yourself and ask God for forgiveness.

Answer 6

The difference between divorce and annulment to the catholic church is when you get an annulment, you are saying the marriage wasn't legitimate. Like it never happened.

It's really just another way for a religion to bend its standards to a modern world.

Fact is many people who preach these sorts of doctorine, don't adhere to the it themselves. So, if you are in keeping your children in an abusive relationship in order to cater to a bunch of unrealistic concepts, then you are being foolish.

Answer 7

If you are being verbally and emotionally abused, get the divorce.

Divorces aren't wrong - it just means that marrying the person you did was the wrong choice and you are righting that wrong. It will be harder on the kid to grow up without both parents, but if one parent is abusive, its better to grow up without that abuse.

Breath, relax and just ask yourself one question. Do you want your child to grow up in a "verbally and emotionally abusive situation?" If the answer is no, then get the divorce.

Answer 8

There is a big difference between divorce and annulment, but the Vatican won't issue an annulment certificate for verbal or emotional abuse.

Answer 9

if there is abuse, then leave by whatever means, your sanity and the sanity of your child is more important to any true Higher Power, than any pathetic rule made up by an old church clinging to the little power over your life that they have. Do you know that the cost to keep a Pope comfortable counts in the Billions of dollars, just think what it costs to keep a Bishop or a Mother Nun, why not just look out for yourself for a change.

Answer 10

Divorce and annulment are pretty much the same thing. Either way it is dissolving a marriage. As for whether or not it is lawful for you to stay with your husband, that is not something any of us can answer. Pray to Go and He will guide you.