ok i have 2 really good friends will call them F1 and F2. well F2 is dating this really lazy selfish guy. F1 and i are worried that shes falling to fast for the wrong guy. everyday he takes her money, she has a job and he doesnt. he cant even buy his own lunh, he made her pay for prom, even though he worked all spring break and had cash he didnt want to spend it on that! F1 and i have been around him without her there and all he does is talk **** about her, about how shes too whiney and how shes gets on his nerves. but now recently theyve started to have sex and F2 thinks shes in lvoe with this loser, hes just in it for the sex! we dont know how to tell her. ses quiting her job soon for cheerleading(were all on the varsity squad together) and F1 and i are afraid that when she quits hell leave her and we dont know how to help her.....HELP.....any suggestions.
2007-04-04 03:57:19 · 3 answers · asked by rckstar88 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Well, when I first started college I was asked out by a guy named X. I didn't really know that much about him since I'd just met him, but he seemed sweet and made it really obvious he liked me.
When I told a couple of my friends about him, they just happened to know who he was and warned me of his reputation. I trusted my friends' judgement and declined politely. He didn't take it so well, and even asked me if I'd consider "just being friends" with him, but I stood my ground.
A year later, I learned that he was cheating on his girlfriend back home by dating another girl.
I'd suggest presenting her with the facts, but definitely don't make the decision for her. We all make mistakes and this sounds as if it will be a learning experience for her.
2007-04-04 04:07:18 · answer #1 · answered by HallamFoe 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like the best thing that could happen to her (in the long run) is if he does leave her and she will finally see him for the jerk he truly is.
I know it is hard to watch your best friend make horrid mistakes with toxic men, but it is there mistakes to make and learn from. You can have a heart-to-heart with her and tell her what you observe about they guy, but if she is head over heels and he is her "first love" it is likely not going to help.
Understand it is her life, her decision, and the best thing you can do for her is be there to support and encourage her to happy and do things that are best for her and support her decisions even when you don't agree with them.
If he/when he does dump her, don't give any "I told you so" or "I knew he was a jerk" (by saying so it is only going to bring her down more as she may interpret it as you don't think she has sound judgment overall), but listen to her and let her grieve her loss, do what you can to build her self-esteem back up, focus on the positive things and try to keep her busy with those things.
2007-04-04 11:13:06 · answer #2 · answered by bottleblondemama 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes you have to just sit back and watch. If you say anything you are going to make her mad. You may know she is making a mistake but sometimes people have to realize the mistake they made while their friends pick up the pieces. As hard as it is you should just wait for him to break her heart and then be there. It is high school and there are lots more guys out there. Good luck.
2007-04-04 11:02:51 · answer #3 · answered by MommyofTwo 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋