help i'm the mother of a 12 almost 13 yearold boy who is having pain in his genitals?

Question

he has a appointment with the docter who by the way is female he is scared i had to drag out of him what was wrong i just dont know what to tell him to expect plus i just found out that i have to be in the room he is going to be really embarresed are their any moms or anyone else that could help me out with this i will let him read some of the replys

Answer 1

Um, if he is having erotic thoughts and doesn't...relieve himself the way teenage boys do... there will be a build up of...fluid in his testicles. Are you with me so far ? This has a common name - Lovers B*lls . This could be the problem. Perhaps he needs to do what comes naturally to relieve the pressure. Teenage boys with erotic thoughts need to do this at least 2-3 times a week or their will be a build up. This can cause life long damage in extreme cases. if he is not having erotic thoughts, can be less.

I'd much rather a women looking at my bits than a man. Maybe don't go in with him, or leave the room for a while.

Answer 2

Ok this would be very embarrassing. I can understand how he would feel but you have to have a heart to heart talk with your son. Explain to him that there is a time to open up to you and that is any time that he thinks he has a problem, physically or emotionally. I would also tell him that the embarrassment will last all of 10 seconds so it is well worth that 10 seconds to find out what is wrong. Also, tell him if he is sooooooooo embarrassed then have him ask you for an appointment with the Dr. and you will have to trust the Dr. to find out what is bothering him. I would also take this time to discuss the role a Dr. has whether the Dr. is a male or a female. This will come up numerous times throughout his life so you might as well address it now.

You also did not say whether this Dr. was his pediatrition or family doctor. Maybe it's time for him to change Doctor's if you feel that him seeing a woman doctor would be a hinderance rather than a help. Or, has he outgrown a pediatrition and should he be seeing a new doctor? These are choices you have to make as a mother so I'd consider them carefully.

You don't say if there is a father in the picture. If there is, why isn't he helping with the situation? If not, then I'm sorry you're left with all the responsibilities.

Answer 3

I won't reiterate what everyone else has already said (have a conversation with him on what to expect, look away or turn around when he has to drop his drawers, etc.). Everybody seems to have addressed most of your concerns except maybe one: the possibility that he might get an erection during the exam.

Because she's a female doctor and because he's almost 13, there's a good chance he might pop a b***r in the middle of the exam (even if he didn't want to or tried really hard not to). He's probably been getting them and is worried that he might get one at the doctor's office. Explain to him that this is normal and the doctor will be used to it happening from other people. Explain that this happens to all boys (and sometimes men) and it's normal. Explain to him that you'll be turned away, so even if it happens, you won't see if it happens.

Answer 4

Explain to him that the law requires you to be in the room with him because he is a minor and it's for his protection as well as the doctors. While the doctor is doing the exam, you could be expressing your concern about the problem with the doctor while looking else where. I recently had to do the same thing when my daughter went for her 1st OB/GYN exam.

You should also explain to him that the human body is a miracle of nature and he should not be embarrassed (though he probably will be) or ashamed of his body. It's better to go ahead and have this taken care of and treated now, rather than wait and taking a chance of it not being able to be treated or corrected later.

Give him a big hug, tell him you love him, and let him know that you will be there for him whenever he needs you.

Answer 5

Be in the room, but just look away. Ask at the desk if there are any males that can preform the inspection......... sometimes in cases like this they will be more than happy to sub in a different gender doctor. Tell your son to be comfortable and that you aren't bothered by this. Make sure he knows that you will be in there......just act really natural and calm. Piece of cake! I am wondering if mabye you could stand right outside of the room. (they might need to have an extra nurse in there, but it might be better for your son) GOOD LUCK! I hope your son gets away from this fast!

Answer 6

Just assure him that this isn't anything sexual...of course! The relationship between a doctor and a patient, no matter what sex the doctor is, is professional and confidential. Your there because you are required to be there. Just let him know that you and the doctor are just concerned about finding out what's wrong, and that there's nothing to be embarrassed about. Believe me, I have a male Gynecologist, and though weird at first, I now feel extremely relaxed because he's there to do his job like anyone else.

Answer 7

well first ask him if he knows this has been caused by anything. being kicked there, etc. also you dont have to be in there do you? ask him if you were to step outa the room for a minute, would it be easier for him?

Answer 8

I could see the embarrassment but if the pain is bad he wont care so long as the issue is fixed. Usually these problems can be resolved without your son having to expose himself, but if he does have to show his stuff maybe you could just turn around so you both will feel comfortable. Do you have a brother or maybe the child's dad could talk to him or take him to the doctor (or go with)? That may help.

Answer 9

Just act like its not a big deal. Let him know if they were checking his tonsils you'd have to be there too. I'm sure he'll be mortified so try to do or say things to make the occasion lighter. Open up to him about what it's like to be a woman and have this area checked all the time! Use humor. Let him know that during the appointment, if it would make him more comfortable, you will turn around. Good luck and I hope he's okay.

Answer 10

Just let him know that the law requires you to be in there and you will be discreet and not openly watch. That age is hard for a little boy, what with the onset of puberty and all. My son really hated it when he got into a bunch of seed ticks at that age and I had to remove a lot of them from the genital area.