Etiquette......?

Question

I went to a bridal shower for my nephew's wife about a month ago and now I received an invitation to ANOTHER bridal shower. Is it common and/or appropriate for a bride-to-be to have more than one shower???

Answer 1

Yes. However, it is rude for the bride to invite you to more than one, because of the financial obligation it puts you through. Don't attend the second shower (unless you want to) and send a small gift that coordinates with the first one you gave her. Enclose a note "this is to be used with the ___ I gave you at your shower in January" or whatever.

Answer 2

It's not uncommon to have more than 1 bridal shower, but personally, I don't think you should have been invited to both.
I had two. One for each side of the family.

I can see where the poster gets the idea that people are milking money. It seems that a lot of brides to be are that way, unfortunately. I can't believe how some people want to put on the invitation itself that they do not want gifts, just money. You should never "expect" anything materialistic from a wedding.

I would simply decline. Let her know that you're sorry you couldn't attend the second one, but at least you made it to the first one....or something along those lines.

Maybe there was a mix up in the guest list???

Answer 3

Sometimes a bride-to-be will have 2 bridal showers ... a lot of the time both sets of parents want to host a shower in their hometown. The guest lists are never the same, though, so I'm not sure why you would be invited twice. Regardless, if you'd like to attend again there is no need to take a second gift ... if you already gave one the first time, then don't feel obligated to take one this time around.

Answer 4

I do not think it is inappropriate under certain circumstances. For example; my fiance's mother threw us a wedding shower a couple of weeks ago (inviting most of his side of the family). Now this weekend is my bridal shower, which my Maid of honor and mother are throwing, my mother invited a few people that attended the wedding shower. Of course she mentioned that a gift will not be necessary. I think you should look at it as if you are special, Maybe they really liked you and that is why they would like for you to attend the other bridal shower I am sure there is a reason for having two and I am sure they wouldn't mind if you didn't bring a gift (assuming you already brought one at the first shower).

Have fun!!!!

Answer 5

Now a days its becoming more common for brides to have a couple different showers. Its not very polite though to invite the same person to each shower unless its the mothers or the bridesmaids, but it does happen. You are not required to either attend the second shower nor send a gift as you have already attended and given you shower gift, but if you want to go you may and just being a card or a smaller token gift.

You will not be breaching any etiquette rules by decling the invitation and not sending a gift, dont worry.

Answer 6

It is common.

And its not the bride having the shower, its whoever is hosting it.

There could be one that the mother of the bride is hosting, then maybe another where a coworker is hosting it, then another one where her best friend is hosting one.

It could be more than one due to location of everyone. My family is in PA so I'm guessing they'll have one. His family is all over so they may have one. I heard that my coworkers might plan one closer to my wedding date. (I'm not saying I'm going to be the guest of honor at three showers, I'm just saying this as an example of what could be the reasoning).

Though I do see it as inappropriate to be invited to two different shower for the same person. I'd pick one shower and go to that one with a gift.

Answer 7

In some parts of the country it is very common to have more than one shower. There may be several reasons; sometimes it is a different kind of shower. One may be a general shower, where housewares are given as gifts; another may be a lingerie shower. Also, more than one friend may want to give a shower.

Whatever the reason, you do not have to attend each one and take a gift each time. If you have spent all you can spend, then graciously decline the next invite, and do not feel guilty! It may be that the bride is trying to keep from hurting your feelings. She may feel that if she did not invite you to every shower, you would get your feeling hurt or feel excluded.
So, she may not expect you to come to every shower, but sent you an invite to all of them to let you know you were important to her.

Answer 8

I think it is pretty common now-a-days. I will probably have 3 showers and a bachelotette party. This is not because I am rude or greedy, just a convenience and comfort thing for my family/guests. My family is huge and so is my fiance's and having one BIG shower is not going to happen for us. I will most likely have one shower with my family, one with his family, and then a more up-beat, fun shower with some of my close girlfriends. I don't intend to invite everyone to all 3 showers because that does seem greedy to me. I just think for me, having the 3 smaller, more intimate showers is more suitable and appropriate.

Answer 9

Sometimes. I have had this happen but it was in a case where the bride's family lived in one state and the groom's family lived about three states over. With two showers both families get a chance to give gifts and congratulations without having to drive huge distances. I only went to the shower thrown by my friend, the bride's, family. I think you could go to both but one present is plenty.

Answer 10

No it's not uncommon for a bride-to-be to have more than one bridal shower. Often, different people may decide to host a party in the brides honor (grooms family, brides family, family friend, etc.). If you have been invited to more than one shower, it is total appropriate to gracefully decline or not purchase an additional gift if you decide to attend.