Ok, my friend is having a problem. shes a smart, athletic, and good looking 19 yr old. she hasnt had a bf for quite a while and she blames it on the fact that shes really quiet. i try to explain to her that she just looks uninterested in guys so they leave her alone but she continually puts herself down and says shes never going to find the right guy. so guys, is being shy really a turn off or does it just make that person difficult to approach? and what advice could i give her to help her be more open to ppl and get a bf?
2007-04-03 13:55:07 · 10 answers · asked by Lizzy S 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
idk. i like shy girls if their pretty. sorry but its true. if she is then its really nice getting to know them and once u get a good relationship going with them then they would open up more. so yeah i guess i like them. i mean it depends. but yeah why not?
2007-04-03 13:58:22 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Personally, there's nothing wrong with being shy and quiet. I'm like that too. But if she wants to get noticed, she's gotta try and put in some inititiative to attract the guy. A smile is always a good way to break the first level of ice with a guy.
Even if the dude doesn't come over and talk, it doesn't mean there's anything wrong with "her". it could just mean that the guy is pretty shy as well. What can also help is if she says a simple "hi". Generally, guys that are extremely shy find it hard to break the ice with women. So if the girl takes the initiative to say hello, the guy will likely say hello back.
2007-04-03 14:02:22 · answer #2 · answered by sum1_keeps_taking_my_name 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First I'd like to say that defining her life based on if she has a bf or not isn't the right way. She has to be happy with who she is first, and then let that happiness carry over into a relationship. Trust me, I've made one too many mistakes in that area.
Being shy isn't as much a turn off as it is hard to read. If I approached her and it was hard to tell if she's interested in return, I'd just move on.
As far as advice goes: I see it as a personality thing. It's her personality to be the way she is. To alter that is to alter who she is. Is that what she wants to do? Change who she is? If so, have her start small. Join a club of some kind (book clubs, martial arts classes, etc.), something she'd be interested in and meet others who have similar interest (based on the club they joined). Then work from there.
I hope this helped a little.
2007-04-03 14:32:41 · answer #3 · answered by Tom P 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm a shy girl. Most guys just take being shy as being uninterested. But I've been told by alot of guys that they find shy girls cute. I usually have my friends hook me up with a guy I like but its usually a turn off when they realize that I am too shy to call them so I try to turn off my shyness if just for a while. The fact that she is shy is probably not a problem, but its the way her shyness affects the way she acts around guys. She should try to loosen up a little around guys and they will feel more comfortable around her.
2007-04-03 14:04:53 · answer #4 · answered by =)™ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the type of girl who is shy, but acts uninterested probably isn't going to find anyone
talking to strangers helps. it could just be asking about someones day who's in line, or offering a piece of advice to someone who looks confused. it doesn't involve long conversations with large blank spots, and if you make a fool of yourself, at least they where strangers you probably won't see again.
2007-04-03 13:59:43 · answer #5 · answered by justanotheruser 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think people mistaken shy for standoffish... if a guy says something to a girl and the girl doesnt respond, he usually says ***** and moves on.. so yes shy is bad... its not fun talking to someone who doesnt respond, might as well talk to a brick wall... eye contact at least if shes too quiet to talk.
2007-04-03 14:02:14 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It dont matter to me if there shy or not.. not like i can walk up to a girl and tell if she is or not considering i cant even talk to a girl without freezing
2007-04-03 13:58:18 · answer #7 · answered by Sean S 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i know this will sound stupid but... tell her to look for kind of a geeky guy, not a full blown nerd but a geek. us geeks really like shy girls cuz we're shy ourselves but really come out of our shell when get to know someone.
2007-04-03 14:01:43 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
its not a turn off, but its make us not want to try because you would have to try harder to get them to talk to you
for me it helps if they're outgoing cuz im rly shy so i snt say alot to girl unless they somethin first
2007-04-03 13:59:11 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I like dominant, outspoken girls -- like my wife. At least that's how she is when she's around me.
2007-04-03 13:58:28 · answer #10 · answered by Mickey Mouse Spears 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋