My hairdresser is always flirting with me, and I finally 'made a move' towards her. How do I right this?

Question

I've been going to the same hairdresser for a long time. She is a young lady who is the BEST at cutting hair.

She is always telling me how cute I am and how lucky she is to cut my hair...which always results in a good tip for her.

She is always rubbing against me while giving me my haircut, so I decided to finally act on it and reach around and grab her buttocks while she was cutting my hair.

She immedietly backed off, pushed me and started yelling at me, making a HUGE scene in front of everyone in the salon.

She then refused to cut my hair and ran into the back crying...

Why would she say all of these things to me, and then react so negativly when I acted upon her advances...

what is worse, I don't think anyone else could cut my hair like she did.

I was thinking of sending her 100.00 in hopes that she'll forget the situation and cut my hair again...what else can I do?

Answer 1

Wow. That's quite a move. I usually saved the butt grabbing for the second or third date. Generally you need to ask a woman out and go out once or twice before she gives you the go-ahead for the butt grab.
The salon is somewhat like the strip club, except that the bouncer doesnt beat the holy heck outta you after grabbing the girls. The same no-hands rules of the strip club apply at the salon.

So far as getting back on the in's with your stylist, you may be S.O.L on that. If you want to try, apologize in person. Tell her that you apologize for what happened, that you misinterpereted what you thought were signals, and you realize now that it was wrong. Don't give her money. It will seem insulting. Ask her if she would still be ok with doing your hair in the future, and that if she agrees to, you will maintain a professional relationship.
Good Luck

Answer 2

Please do NOT send her more money to try and fix the situation- all it will do is insult her. While she should not have crossed the line by flirting with you so much, I think you grabbing her butt was a bit over the top. Right now, there is some serious embarrassment going on on both sides... So, the best advice I could give would be to write a nice (not flitatious) note and send it to her explaining that you're sorry you crossed the line and that you only did so because you sensed a mutual attraction. Be very clear that this will never be repeated and ask her if she would still be willing to be your stylist as long as you keep the relationship strictly professional. If she says no, or ignores your note, MOVE ON. There are other stylists out there. GUARANTEED.

Answer 3

Most of the people that already answered this are correct. Part of the haircut was the flirting and part of the price was the tip. Find another place to get your hair cut and avoid her. Any move to reconcile the differences will most likely result in further embarrassment for both of you. You are fortunate she didn't file charges against you.

Keep your hands to yourself in all professional settings. Sorry you had to learn the hard way, but it could have been much worse. Good luck.

Answer 4

APOLOGIZE TO HER IN PERSON and DO NOT OFFER HER ANY MONEY. Just tell her you misread the signals she was sending.

Also, if you were interested in her you should have just asked her out and not grabbed her buttocks.

Just an FYI - I am a married straight woman and my hairdresser is a gay man at least 20 years younger than me and he ALWAYS flirts with me and all the women who come into the salon. For some people that just their way of being friendly (and insuring good tips).

Answer 5

$100 isn't going to do it. Why she acted that way, who knows. My take it is her way of making you feel good about her and her work and keep coming back. Customer retention is key in that business. She probably never dreamed you would make a move like that in a public place.

Apologize to her and let her know you want to still be a customer, she's the best stylist you've ever had and promise to never do anything like that again. It's best in person but I don't know how you could do that in a work place, so get a nice card, put a nice note in it and drop it off. Don't mail it! After a few days, call and see if you can get her on the phone, if she read the card/note and if she forgives you. If that doesn't work, find a new stylist.

Answer 6

Send a card and flowers to the shop saying how sorry you are for misreading her, and how ashamed you are for acting the way you did, and you'd never do that again in a million years, and that's not the kind of guy you are-- should smooth things over.

In the long run, her flirtation was just an act concocted to get bigger tips. So tip big the next time she cuts your hair, and then gradually dwindle down to an adequate tip.

Answer 7

She was definitely working it for a good tip. Grabbing her buttocks was not the best way to show her you were interested. Perhaps it would have been more effective to ask her to join you for a drink or a meal. It's far too late for that now.

You will have to find someone else to cut your hair. I don't think you can pay her off at this point.

Answer 8

DO NOT SEND HER $$$$!!!

I will tell you like it is! I was a bartender for 5 years! I spent everynight behind a bar, FLIRTING with every man that sat there.....WHY, you ask? Because the more I flirted, the more they TIPPED me! I would have never had gone home or even danced with any of them...But, they felt otherwise.

I know, I sound bad...I will admit it was childish...I was! But I was a well paid child!

Answer 9

She flirted to get a tip. You'll insult her by mailing money. You're better off trying to talk to her and explain you misunderstood and apologize or just face facts and get a hair cut somewhere else. There are tons of places, and a mens hair cut is pretty simple.

Answer 10

Just tell her you got hair in your eyes and you were groping around blindly, looking for a towel to wipe your eyes with. Tell her you felt fabric and thought it was a towel, so you grabbed it. Boom, issue resolved.