For the past three (almost four) years I have been heartbroken over a love that I had had since sixth grade. He had a crush on me then, and I got my first kiss from him in 7th grade. Eight years later, we considered getting married, and we broke up about a month after that. I had known him for eleven years, and it seemed like he just evaporated from my life. Although I have dated frequently since then, it seems like all the people i date are similar to him in personality. My current boyfriend and I are thinking about marriage as well, and I am a bit hesitant about the whole thing, though he is wholly ready. I feel bad that my current boyfriend is not receiving as much pure love as he should be because I continue to think about my first love. Is it true that people never get over their first love, or is there hope for me?
Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
2007-04-02 15:03:19 · 22 answers · asked by sarasugar 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
It is possible, although it doesn't feel like it.....
it took me forever to get over my first love, years in fact. After a failed 4 year marriage, I still wondered about my first love. I knew that I couldn't get over it until I knew for sure that it was over. I contacted him, and made a lunch date with him. As soon as I saw him, all of my old feelings came rushing back, even felt faint. He had also had a failed marriage. We talked, and we seemed to reconnect....... until we kissed. It was like we were both searching for something that was no longer there. We spent the rest of the afternoon giggling, while walking down memory lane. Then is when I realised, he would always have a special place in my heart, and he was my past, and not my future. I walked away from him that evening, feeling great about him, and the time we shared. I found the closure I needed to move forward. He taught me how to love and to be loved...... a life lesson that I needed, so when Mr Right walked in my life, I was ready for him.
Just take time for yourself, and reflect, take what life lessons you learned from your first love, and appreciate the relationship for that. And then reflect on the relationship you have now.... you will see... I am sure... how much you've grown, and if you truly love the man you are with, it will only solidify you are right to move forward, with happiness in your heart. It's really easy to hold on to someone from the past, because you know how that worked out, an escape, a memory.
2007-04-02 15:23:51 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have not see my first love in 13 years. I have not talked to him in 12 years. I have had several relationships since then and am currently married but from time to time, yes I still wander how he is doing or what he is doing now.
It is not that you never get over them it is just they will hold a special place in your heart forever and ever as they were your first love. I
2007-04-02 22:09:34 · answer #2 · answered by M D 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
most people never forget their first love because firsts are always something really special to everyone BUT it doesn't mean you can't move on with the person you are currently in love with! remember that its okay to be dwelling and reminiscing about your first bf and i'm sure you'll "get over it" eventually and will finally start thinking about your boyfriend that you have right now. heartbreaks are a natural process you have to go through in life to find that one special person and you're just healing right now. and so to answer your question, yes there is hope for you ^_^
2007-04-02 22:13:43 · answer #3 · answered by ♥ RL 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your first love will always be special. You will not get over it, but you can get through it. The heart is very powerful when used along with your mind. If you are not ready then do not get married. Take your time, maybe take a little time apart from your current to see how much you do love them.
2007-04-02 22:10:13 · answer #4 · answered by DR 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I believe that the only reason we don't let go of the past and have a hard time getting over people, moving on, etc., is when we're unhappy with our present and believe that our future will never get better. Holding yourself back and preventing your own potential happiness, could be?
2007-04-02 22:09:33 · answer #5 · answered by LetMeBe 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It is very possible. I have done many other people have done it. Alot of people you meet dont tell you they are with the person, today, that they first fell in love with, therefore it is possible. Focus on the splendid love you have today and not so much on your love from the past. The past is done, move foward towards the future and share it with someone you love who's in your life now, not someone who's been in and out of your memory.
2007-04-02 22:09:23 · answer #6 · answered by purplereaper251 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes. I still love the first guy I ever loved. We were together for 6 years (high school sweethearts). I still think about him at least once a week, even though we are both married now to other people.
2007-04-02 22:06:54 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
You don't ever actually get over someone. And you never stop loving them, you just learn to live without them and be happy. You'll always think about him, but you need to move on. Maybe don't get married yet if you're heitating. Give it some more time. Good luck!!
2007-04-02 22:08:34 · answer #8 · answered by Life Sucks Get A Helmet 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
No, I don't think it's that hard to get over a crush. The more you think about how hard it is to get over the other guy, the harder it will be to get over him. Just let it go and focus on your man. It's really not that difficult. Focus on the present and the future! Good luck!
2007-04-02 22:09:14 · answer #9 · answered by anonymous 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
YOu'll always have a place in your heart for him & think about him often. I still think about my first love but I do know that it wasn't meant to be. Good Luck
2007-04-02 22:06:49 · answer #10 · answered by !Sweetie! 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋