My husband's friend's wife is expecting and the husband wants her to drive herself to the hospital to deliver?

Question

They live about an hour or so away from any major hospitals and don't have nearby friends/relatives to drive her. He doesn't want to pay for a cab or ambulance bill. What should she do? I'm thinking her husband is a rat and divorce wouldn't be uncalled for...but that is my husband's friend. I hate to think of a pregnant lady with one young child trying to drive herself to the hospital in labor. We're not close enough to be any use.

This same person went into preterm labor with her first and was only in labor for 4 hours. Her water broke at home around 32 weeks with her first. She's a "high risk" pregnancy.

Same guy bragged to my husband about having her drive herself 3 hours home after abdominal surgery...because he was "too tired" to pick her up from the hospital.

Answer 1

Tell him to try to drive to the hospital with a watermelon coming out of his ***. See if he thinks it's possible then. ;) What a rat!

Answer 2

It's not really any of your business. She's not even your friend, she's your husband's friend's wife. When someone tells you an outrageous story like that usually you don't hear the whole thing. Maybe he wants her to drive herself because it would take him over an hour to get to their house from work and then an hour back to the hospital and 2 hours is too long. Maybe she has money and is too cheap to pay for it herself?

Maybe the cab or ambulance fee would make it impossible to make their mortgage payment and their little baby would be homeless. I took an ambulance once for 10 miles and the bill was over 600 dollars! If you care so much why not find out how much it really costs and offer to pay some of it!

If you don't know all the facts you should not trash him on a public forum like this. Now you've got a dozen people calling this baby's dad an ****** but they don't even know him. Is that what your friend wants while she's about to give birth?

Answer 3

That is absolutely unacceptable. If she causes an accident while driving during a contraction, she could kill herself, their child, and any other poor schmuck she might run into. If he needs to stay home with the other child, then he needs to call a cab, although I'm not sure a cabbie is required to pack up a woman in labor. She should check beforehand. The expense of the alternative could be immeasurably worse. A neighbor might be willing to stay with the older child for a while so the husband can at least drive Mama to the hospital. It's hard to believe he wouldn't want to be there, anyway.

Answer 4

Well chances are she won't make it to the hospital, will have to call 911 and will be stuck with an ambulance bill anyway. The jerk obviously has no clue as to what it's like giving birth and I can only assume that this is her first as well. to even think she could go along with that birdbrain idea. Ask if there are any midwives out there nurses who are willing to help her delivery. They can come to her house and deliver there. If not I can hear them sirens blaring now. She should stay close to the idiot if he goes to work she will have to stay with him and drive around until he gets out at least the last 2 weeks of her pregnancy at least she will be close to civilization.

Answer 5

Hmmm. Don't be so judgmental. Pregnancy, labor even, isn't a disability. She should plan ahead. Why not have her come stay with you when she starts dialating? Most women have a check up near the time of delivery and the doctor will say they are a centimeter or two, so there is usually time to get to the hospital.

Answer 6

Driving herself while in labor is a threat to herself, her unborn child, her young child AND anyone else on the road! The only way I could see this as acceptable is if she is going in for an induced labor or scheduled c-section so that being in labor would not be a threat.

What a jerk! If he can't afford a cab, how is he guna afford another child???

Answer 7

That's horrible. If I were her, I would get out of that relationship. But aside from that... maybe she could go stay with someone who can take care of her, drive her to the hospital, and be with her there until the baby is born. Like a parent or friend - then she will be safe and not have to worry and maybe the husband will get the signal that he is doing something wrong. It is unsafe for her to do that alone.

Answer 8

perhaps she should book a hotel for a week or so before the baby is due and charge it to him. Perhaps he's joking? Perhaps she shouldcarry on and do the best she can and it will all make him look pretty foolish if she feels its safe at the time.If this is his true position it may be the time for her to make a life on her own since he's obviously not indicating much compassion for family.A lawyer may be in order tp secure her interests at this point.

Answer 9

Ambulance bill??? where are you from?? Anyway yes the husband is an @rsehole and I think she should pack her bags, pay for a cab this very minute and go live with relatives who care about her and the baby!!

Answer 10

do you mean your not close enough as friends or that you don't live close enough to be of any use ?

either way I'd tell her call the cab or ambulance if needed & tell him if he wants to see the
child her will pay the cab/ambulance bill

he sounds like he has some growing up to do !

Answer 11

I live like, 1 mile away, so it woulnd't be unreasonable for me.

BUT AN HOUR??? A lot can progress or happen in an hour and for him to be more concerned about $$ than his wife AND his baby's health and safety is pretty cold!! Besides, half the time they want you to wait it out at home so she could go and be sent back or she could wait too long.