First Time Sex.?

Question

I recently had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. & I was really worried it would hurt but when we did it, i didnt feel anything. I didnt bleed or anything. But then when we tried a new possition of me lifting up my legs, it hurt loads. A friend said it happened to her and she had to keep letting it hurt a few times and the pain went and then it felt good. Thing is i dont feel anything when we have sex, we have had it four times not and it dont feel good. And then when we do a possition where he is going straight deep into me it hurts. so do you think i need to get past this pain? and has this happened to any of you? and why do i not feel anything when we do it normally in normal possitions. Is he just not going in at the right angle? Im sorry if this is an akward question lol =] but i really need to know the answer.

bbbrrrrrrrrrrrr

btw. im 17 years old and im not stupid so please dont think as me as a nieve child. im 17, and i know all about sex. i was totally ready and relaxed when i decided to have it. so i hope you dont believe (as some of you do) that im under age. because I am not.

im greatful you are all helping me but i feel like your missing the point. my boyfriend is really understanding and I can talk to him about anything and we have waited ages before having sex. & i am ready, and We have tried other things before sex and everything seems great I was just surprised i felt nothing and then when it feels like he goes into a certain part of me i feel the pain i only wanted to know if there was a reason to this.

Answer 1

Discuss this with a gyneacologist

Answer 2

Yes Amy I think there a missing the point. Let's review the facts you 17, your boyfriend is attentive and sounds like a good guy. You are ready and relaxed and you and your boyfriend have done other things… so there's nothing you're fearing here.

There's one thing here that many people just don't understand just like a guy can be well endowed and some are short…. women can have a vagina that is long or short. I first live-in girlfriend was short in that area. In other words a finger put in there that easily hit the tip of her cervix. Now another woman I went with later was obviously long tracted… but in the fingering all the way never reached the cervix.

If the head of the penis is banging into the cervix (this especially happens when your legs are on his shoulders) then this will brews the cervix. It's quite painful and can cause a sharp pain when it first hits then dull but pain as he continues. These bruised feeling will continue a bit after sex also. Now the girl with the long track you could pinned her knees to her ears and she had no problem.

So there are two factors here one is that distance between the opening and cervix and how well endowed your partner is. Doing it more does not solve the problem…. my girlfriend I lived together for five years and she always had the same issue. The point was to try positions that didn't bother her.

Now the other part of your question is not feeling any sensation. Unfortunately not all women do. Most women do not come through intercourse. The most common reason is guys can't last long enough to get them there. One cure for that for the going to rub you where it feels best and get you almost to coming then have sex. You can then continue his rubbing while you're having intercourse. This usually works all the time.

But again some women do not have orgasms at all through intercourse. These women will typically have orgasms by oral fairly easy. Some women are very orgasm through intercourse of require 10 to 30 minutes of steady intercourse that is well lubricated (if not you will dry and it will be painful). These women have a sensitive GSpot which is in the vagina and towards the front about midway. Women like this can orgasm with just fingers rubbing on that spot.


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Answer 3

First, people have to accept the fact that you are going to have sex regardless of what they tell you on here. So why doesn't everyone stop wasting space telling her not to do it, and just help the girl with her problem. Ok, several people have the pain part right. It's most likely he's hitting your cervix. Your friend that said she had to let it hurt a few times, probably just got used to the pain and it became one of those things that it hurts in a pleasurable way. As far as you feeling nothing, you said this happens when you are in the missionary. Then you said it hurts when you changed positions. But did you feel anything else in the different positions? If you're not really feeling anything besides the pain, there are a couple of things that could be going on here. He might just be too thin. Or you might be too wet. Those would probably be most likely, but I can't say for sure.

Answer 4

Hi!

I sometimes get the same thing - and I'm 22 and have had lots of sex! (But only with 2 men.... before you all judge me ;-) lol!) So it may be because you have only recently started doing it, or it may be for other reasons.

Is it the missionary sex that leaves you with no feeling? I find that sometimes missionary doesn't do it for me - but then when we try other positions, particularly 'doggy style' it can hurt.

It could be because you are either too aroused (therefore too wet to feel any friction) or not aroused enough (so it feels mechanical and isn't really doing anything for you!) Sorry for being so blunt with my descriptions! There's no other way to put it, I suppose!

It most likely will get easier the more you do it. Also, did you know that the average woman is only about 5 inches deep inside - whereas the average man is about 7 inches long? So if you're doing a position where he has easy access, it could be that he is simply a little too big for you and needs to.... well... put less of it inside you!

I'm really glad you and your boyfriend have a good relationship and can talk about things. I'm glad he's respectful and understanding of you.

I'd say keep trying - find out what positions work for you. It can also be different each time, depending on your mood and level of arousal, so don't expect to enjoy every position every time.

Each time, make sure you have lots of foreplay first to get you relaxed and into the mood, so that it does more for you. Get your boyfriend to take it very slowly too.

It might also help you to invest in a vibrator, such as the rabbit, to use when you're alone (and with him, eventually if you want!). I found that this helps you to learn what you like and helps 'loosen' you up, lol! (but don't worry, it won't loosen you up too much!)

If it's still hurting after a month or so of trying, go and see your doctor as it could be that you have an infection or inflammation that you aren't aware of. It's always best to get checked out, just to be on the safe side!

Good luck and congratulations for being responsible about things!

xx Emmie

Answer 5

First off when you have sex in the missionary position (him on top) then he is not deeply penetrating you. When you lift your legs up it is going in you the deepest and that is why it may hurt. If it does hurt and you are not very wet then you can use some lube to ease the friction and it will allow it to go in more smoothly. If it is extermly painful you may not be lubed up enough and may want to get ky jelly (not petroleum because there is something in it that will wear through the condom (you better be using a condom) and decreases the effectiveness of the condom. If it is exteremly painful even after this you may want to talk to your doctor.

Yes this has happened to me before and I waited till I became wetter, used lube or did a different position that did not hurt.

You do not feel anything when you do missionary because the penis is not very deep inside you (it is hard to get the penis deep inside you). The penis is the deepest inside you with the lifting of the legs position and doggy style. Changing angles does affect the feeling and experience.

This is not an awkward question this is an important question and I do not mind helping you out. Make sure you use protection that is very important no matter who he is or how many partners he has had. Be safe and good luck.

Answer 6

It does take a while for some women to enjoy sex but one day it will suddenly feel as though you are having a fit and that will be an orgasm. Don't let your guy put you in any position that hurts you. The trouble is that guys get so carried away that they mistake the squawking of pain for that of delight - the two are very similar. I have heard of lots of women who think its not going to work for them but it always does eventually. I am sorry you have a problem because sex is very important but it will come right

Answer 7

find out ur best position in which it hurts the least an try that but make ur bf do it rly slowley an gentley until it dnt hurt no more. also try loads of foreplay and get rly relaxed and maybe sum lub as well 2 make it easier. after a while it wont hurt and then u can move on2 more adventorous things =] d.w my 1st time didnt hurt neighter but the next couple of times it did an then 1 day it just felt gd

Answer 8

well you said you know all about sex... which is good thing and now you gone where you never done before and first time to have sex..... so what made you think that boyfriend of yours will be with you forever?? what if he find someone better than you.....How will you handle this???

Yes it does hurt and it will always hurt until you do once a while not 4 time or 10 times a day it make it more pain ful once awhile give your thing rest and then again later like3 days or more then again and then again and so that way it will make your self more better and used and then you will feel the best part...

Does he know how to do eat in the "Y" if not then he sure doesn't know what he is doing smiling....

Answer 9

Who are the people answering your question? its 2007 and young people have sex without being married now adays. They always did but people just didnt know about it. You are obviously with someone who u care about and who cares about you. You obviously know about stds and pregnancy so I dont know where these people come from. Sex is also legal in the UK from 16. I presume thats where u are from.

It does take a while of having sex for you to start feeling pleasure from it. when u are in the painful positions maybe its because his penis is pressing on ur cervix. Women mostly get aroused and pleasure from having their clitoris stimulated so maybe he needs to concerntrate on there. Dont worry too much yet, just enjoy experimenting and having fun. If u are still having problems in a few months time, see ur GP. Some women never orgasm from plain sex, but it doesnt mean they dont enjoy it.

Answer 10

Maybe you should try some sort of lube? Perhaps that will help when you try the deeper positions?

It sounds like you are really in love, I hope that is the case, and you two are being safe. If your boyfriend is as understanding as you say, just take your time, and find what works for you, trust me, when you find what makes you feel good, he will enjoy it all the more too.

Just pace yourself, making love is about just that. Loving the one you are with.

Answer 11

When you lift up your legs, they go deeper and hit your cervix, which is really sensitive, especially when you just begin to have sex. You may be getting really wet and cant feel the friction....or maybe he doesn't have a very pronounced head to rub that gspot.... you need to learn your own body then you will know how to work it and move so he hits your spots. Play with ur button then stick ur finger inside and back to feel ur g spot, it should be a swollen place just inside, that's what you want to work on his member to get the good feelings. Take a little control, don't just lay there waiting for him to make you feel good.