Why do guys...?

Question

Why do most guys not give a f*ck about females? First he says that he doesn't know if he wants to be with me...then he says that he doesn't...then he says he wants to marry me and have a baby with me...then he doesn't even want to be my friend. He's 22 and I'm about to be 20. He wont tell me whether or not if I've done something wrong. OMG! I don't know what to do.
Please give advice for a broken heart and on what the hell to do about this. Also, please give me your age...Thanks

Answer 1

Jumping the gun to post this in weddings but hey I'm not limited to categories. First off "most" guys do care. What you have encountered is a "jerk." Now, the situation goes as follows. He informs you of the truth ("he doesn't want to be with you" and doesn't want to be your friend). Then you guilt him around to or do something incredibly, which probably involves a slight change in your personality...so he concludes that clearly you don't mind how he treated you and don't care that he doesn't want to be with you--but you are more than pleased wtih the lil bit of himself he is willing to give.

Hmm he thinks. Now this is the girl I might could be with. I don't have to give her any more than this.

But of course you change your mind and start wanting him to think of you seriously and treat you differently. Whoa--thats not the girl I agreed to take back. Thats the girl I didn't want to be with.

He seems quite clear. You one the other hand are something else. He treats you bad. But you are still wtih him. He is clear about not wanting to be with you, but just b/c he wants to sleep with you and produce child, you think thats ok as well. It is time you learn to stand up for yourself. You train people how to treat you. You are training him that you don't care how he treats you.

You need to learn what you want from a guy. What it is that you deserve. What qualities a guy who you want to be with will possess. Read "He's Just Not That Into You." Great book. Then do not date guys that don't treat you the way you deserve to be treated. It sounds simple b/c it is simple. A clear "this isn't working for me" and an exit. And if your self-esteem is really so bad that you can't do it b/c you deserve better--then think of it this way. He deserves better. He isn't happy with you. So clearly you should get out of his life so that he can find someone that suits him. It's not about if you've done something wrong, it's about the fact that YOU are wrong. for him at least.

A guy treats the woman he wants to be with like a princess. He would do anything for her. He never worries about expressing his love and if she leaves, he earns her back. Why does he do this? B/c he can't imagine life without her. You are not in this situation. Therefore, he will not act like that. Now you can cry and manipulate him into staying. You can twist his words into something that make you happy for a week--or you can realize that neither of you are happy and end this charade of a relationship.

You deserve better. Figure out what you want in a guy and refuse to accept less than that. Refuse to be unhappy with someone just to avoid the horrible stigma of being single. Learn to love yourself and raise your own self-worth til you believe that you don't deserve whatever scraps are thrown your way.