My Mother, who is mentally ill, is very very sick. My Dad left her for another woman (just happened to be one of her friends) three years ago and she has really gone off of the deep end. Since then, she's been in and out of institutions, hospitals, on various medications, group homes, and has recently undergone over 20 electroconvulsive therapy treatments. Nothing is working! She's in agony each and every day and has extreme obsessions and compulsions about cleanliness and feels that she "can't do anything right." Our telephone conversations are all about reassurance and her continual hand washings (washes up to 50x per day) and that's it....she just can't focus on anything else. She, too, has put the family through a lot as she's always talking about death, dying, how she "can't" anymore, etc. Is it wrong for me to wish for an angel to come down and get her while she sleeps....and just send her home. It's what she wants. She wants to be with her parents up in heaven.
2007-04-02 07:27:39 · 14 answers · asked by Mom of One in Wisconsin 6 in Health ➔ Mental Health
I pray for her each and every day. My heart aches for her. I miss my Mom!She left the day that my Dad left her and I don't where she went.
2007-04-02 07:34:18 · update #1
No, it's not wrong. Don't feel guilty about how you feel. I'm sorry she's in so much pain and I know it's terrible to witness a parent's decline. Just reassure her that you love her no matter what. And try to do things for your own mental health. Get out and spend time with friends. You can't continuously have her on your mind--it will suck you right down with her.
2007-04-02 07:32:25 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
What a horrible situation for you and your mother to be in. That is a terrible thing to have happened. I am so sorry to hear this, I barely know what to say.
It is not wrong for you to feel the way you are feeling. I wished the same for my dad; however his illness was physical and there was no hope.
There may be hope for your mom if she gets the correct care that she needs. I get the idea that you do not live near her. Is there anything you can do to help her get better medical care. There is therapy and medication to help with the OCD that she has. I hope that someone can give her better care than she is getting now.
Mental illnesses are so hard because the family members do get impatient with the ill person. Mentally ill people cannot help being ill any more than physically ill people can help it.
God bless you and your mother. I am so sorry she is so unhappy.
2007-04-02 08:49:13 · answer #2 · answered by Patti C 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your care for your mom is commendable, considering how difficult this has been for you as well. When your spouse cheats on you after you've given so much of yourself to them for so long, you feel like there's nothing left of you. You blame yourself and torture yourself. What she needs to know is that God has a plan for her life that does not involve that man anymore. She is strong and physically able to learn to live again. She wouldn't even speak to you if she didn't want deep down to get back up and dust herself off. Start asking her about what she liked to do or wanted to do when she was younger. Refuse to talk about anything negative with her. If she is willing to focus on everything that is good in life, then things will get better. It will take time. She is so lucky to have you!
2007-04-02 07:43:49 · answer #3 · answered by GladToBeSaved 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am so sorry for what you, your mom and your family members are experiencing...
Not that my experience even closely matches your mom's, but I can understand her grief and where she's going...I have lost so much in a short time, and I'm just trying to keep my head above the water...maybe your mom is just below the surface. Keep on praying for her my friend, and try to make sure she keeps her appointments. God has an angel following her.
Also, for you - I'd check out http://dailystrength.org
it has lots of support for family caregivers! Good luck!
2007-04-02 07:56:06 · answer #4 · answered by The_Cookie_Goddess 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it is not wrong to wish your mom out of pain. that is normal and when she hurts you hurt too. it does take a while for the right meds to kick in and therapy to work and maybe when all that happens you may have your mother back. believe me it is hard to not have a mother. mine died when i was 26 and i still feel a little like an orfan. keep praying for your mother and hopefully things will start to look up. she may feel like a lab rat right now. trying to get meds right. thats how i've felt before. just keep hoping.
2007-04-02 07:58:13 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
sometimes it can be hard to let someone go but you should really think about your mom she is probably suffering a lot and i think i might be the right thing to want that. Your mom will probably be happier free.
she wont have all these pains and problem it is like you want to send her on a nice long vaction and that is what she needs to be on vaction in hevan
good luck
i hope she does get better
2007-04-02 07:36:05 · answer #6 · answered by Yo its me 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh, I am so sorry you are having to go through this. Of course it's ok to pray for someone to go to heaven, but it's more important to pray that your Mom will have the best thing happen to her. Maybe it's not her time to go and she needs to have prayer for support and strength. I know you hate to see her suffer, and I am so sorry. I will say a little prayer for her tonight.
2007-04-02 07:31:50 · answer #7 · answered by carolinayaya 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It seems like she is suffering from extreme hurt and stress and depression. Just pray for her cause it is just like a wish. No it is not wrong to wish cause it is like a prayer and she can get better with prayer.
2007-04-02 07:32:15 · answer #8 · answered by JoJoBa 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no it is not wrong for you to wish this.. you only want some relief from the stress and she must be under a lot of stress her self.. but there is a chance she will pull throuth this.. just keep the faith and maybe all will be ok
2007-04-02 12:30:34 · answer #9 · answered by vis 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no there is nothing wrong with that becuse the good Lord wont take her till hes ready for her anyway. Good luck and God Bless
2007-04-02 07:32:12 · answer #10 · answered by Georgia Peach 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋