Do I give this another shot or what?

Question

Okay, so my ex thinks we should try to make things work between us. We both love each other very much. We have been apart for a year, and dated other people, but we both feel that we will never meet anyone that we love as much as we love each other. The problem is, we are bad for each other. We go together like peanut butter and spaghetti. We are what happens when you hold a stick of dynamite to a lighter....KABOOM!!!! But, we love each other, and we want to try to make it work. I am 20 and he is 22. Our families ABSOLUTELY DO NOT WANT US TOGETHER!!!! They don't even know we started talking to each other again. I don't want to disappoint my family, but I don't want to live my life without my other half either! Is it worth it? Should we try to make things work? I am just worried that any guy I ever get with will always be second best in my heart, and that isn't fair....Please help!!!

okay, more info...it doesnt matter how f*ckin old I am....seriously! We started dating when I was 13 and he was 15, and I had to grow up very quick....I dealt with alot of crap in my childhood that I never should have had to deal with, so I am probably more mature than most 30 year olds. Him too, we have both had a pretty rough life.
The problem with me and him is that we can sometimes influence each other to do bad things....we used to party alot. But we both grew up and got our crap together, we both go to college, we both work. But our families are afraid if we get back together we will ruin each others life. I dont think we will though!

Answer 1

~If it didn't work the 1st time it won't work the 2nd, 3rd, or 4th time...
it doesn't sound like love to me. (Love is when you both want what is BEST for each other.)
it sounds like addiction to me. (like when you know its wrong but you act like its just a game, and its fun, so you don't care...)

move on to that "something better" that's out there waiting just for you Sweetheart!

Answer 2

I must say I am going through the same thing but with my friends and my family and what happens is that you will try to please your family and in the end you will be miserable and its not fare to you. My best friends are married and they fight like all the time and gran it I don't recommend it because it can strain the relationship it does work and just remember you are in your in early 20's and need time to grow maybe you should work on not fighting so much because that is what both families are seeing and that is why they dont want you to be together work on being best friends first and so when things do arise you can talk about it and not fight as much you need to realize life is so short and you both really dont know how long you have with each other work on it together and show the families it can work Good luck:)

Answer 3

Ok - you've already realized you're bad for each other - that's a big sign right there. You're only 20...believe me, there's a lot more out there than you can know right now. Trust me...I felt that way twenty years ago! I thought I just couldn't be apart from this one guy...funny how your mind changes when you get pregnant, and he's suddenly not around. But here I am, very happily married - to someone I had no idea I'd ever meet. Your heart and mind will change over time. Really. (Besides - do you really want to be stuck with someone who you know is not good for you?)

Answer 4

Your young. Of course you haven't had the real chance of comparing other men to him. go to school, clubs, wait till your 21 to see what the real men are like.
Overall, family first. They will be there as they always have been. Going back to the past never works. Have you ever seen it work? there are no exceptions. it won't work cause you hope it will. don't imagine what it will be like, you already know. You two have built up what you think of each other..that doesn't exsist, one person will NEVER change for the other. If you gave yourself the chance to stop thinking about him and hoping to get back together, u might have a real chance with a better man. Don't create drama for just a boy. Your family will be right and you'll feel foolish.

Answer 5

Your family loves you and they see what you might not. You obviously know you two are not good together. Your family will always be there for you and this guy wont. Let him go, move on..If you don't find someone right now maybe it's just a good time to be single. Don't try and go backward in life, move forward. Get rid of him. You will get over it eventually as soon as Mr. Right comes along.

Answer 6

It all depends on why you guys clash so much. If it is a violent relationship, than absolutly not. Try and think about the future. Will you be happy with him? Can you both support eachother? Does he have a bright future, and do you? IF he is a bum, and you have high expectations for eachother, than no dont get back into it. IF you think that he can support you, and he isnt a violent person....follow your heart. Dont listen to your parents our anyone else. its your choice. Just make sure that in the end you will be happy.

Answer 7

WELL, FIRST OF ALL, your TRUE other half isn't gonna be one who you can't get along with at all, you just haven';t found the right one yet, neither have I, after a 9 yr relationship, then another whom I married, and have the MOST BEAUTIFUL child by- he just cant get his crap together, thats why hes in the penn- but anyhoo, if it doesnt work, it just doesnt work, you should move on with your life and then you will meet the REAl one of your dreams, oncce you happy with your self/life!! You can do it!

Answer 8

If what you say is all true, agree to start going to couples counseling. In time, things will be clear to you. Yes you can make it as a couple and your families will see the positive change in both of you and give their blessing. Or the therapist will show why everyone is so concerned and you will understand that too.

Answer 9

but why your parents don't want you both together again??? wow, It was me and If my daughter same way you are in right now I always will support my daughter and if she want to do that and give other try.. that fine with me.. as long he treat my daughter very well and respect and also, talk about everything, talk about future talk about, marriage, talk about how to solve the plm? talk about anything before you get married and how it works and how to solve it and does you guys like sex or not, do you guys want kids?? stuff like that you really need to talk about it and seriously talk about it without getting upset or feel mad.. it a good start and good way to work it out...

smiling....My mom didn't want me to marry my wife and guess what I ingore it and got married 1997 and now will be 10 years in Oct. 31st 2007 smiling. 2 kids and baby due this week so we talk about everything and what we want in life and stuff.. If we didn't and we won't last long in marriages.

Answer 10

Except for the KABOOM and the rest of the dramatics, you've given no real information to show that you're bad for one another. Hence, it's anybody's guess as to whether or not you should stay together.

Answer 11

if you are that bad together i would not give it a second chance. i wouldn't risk being miserable with someone just because you love them. sometimes love just isn't enough and i believe that. its not worth getting your family mad and all of that if you know you guys don't get along at all. and maybe you two really aren't in love? maybe it's just the closets you have been to experiencing it. because if you really loved each other you wouldn't be that bad for one another...