I am sixteen and Ihave a boyfriend who really wants to have *** but I really dont want to just yet! He keep going on about the fact I might not like him, but I just dont really want to get to close to him yet. What should I do?
2007-04-02 01:41:05 · 55 answers · asked by Hollz 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Tell him lay off or you'll dump him.
Hmmm - I guess that's actually a bit much for an ultimatum. Maybe how about tell him to lay off or you'll sulk.
Well ... you're not saying No - not ever. You are saying - Not now. I'll be ready at a later time.
A certain amount of negotiation and argument is usual for any relationship. But the basic tenet of a relationship is that both of you get to make decisions together.
He wants to take a step that you aren't ready for. Options are either (1) he waits for you, (2) you take a jump and try to get where he wants you both to be or (3) the two of you split.
It may get to a stage where he tells you - he wants sex with you or he'll leave you. Definitely dump him if this is the case.
You're going to have to think about some of these options.
2007-04-02 01:43:26 · answer #1 · answered by Orinoco 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Tell him that no means no, and if HE really likes YOU, he will respect your wishes. If he continues to pressure you, dump him, as he is obviously more interested in sex than he is in you. Only YOU will know when the time is right for you. Do NOT let some guy pressure you into it. And you might want to let him know - if he's not ready to be a daddy, he's not ready to have sex either.
It is disappointing to see that in the other questions you have asked you A), said you were just 12 going on 13, and that B), you really wanted to have sex but didn't know how, and you didn't want your boyfriend to think you were 'chickening out'. Once people discover your questions are mostly lies they'll quit answering. Why lie?
2007-04-02 01:46:01 · answer #2 · answered by They call me ... Trixie. 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
DON'T YOU DARE GIVE IN. You wait until you are good and ready, it should be a mutual thing with no pressure. If you are not ready yet you will regret it. You are only 16 and there are plenty of things for you to do or try without full sex. Try these and then see how you feel - don't rush chuck. You have plenty of time, if he cares about YOU he will wait with you. If he just wants to get his rocks off he will continue to pressure you or move on. If he moves on then thats better for you, if he waits with you, you will both appreciate it more as you will be even closer.
2007-04-02 01:49:16 · answer #3 · answered by Zaksta 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him to back off a bit. There is nothing worse than a guy that cant keep his c*ck in his pants long enough for the girl to feel comfortable. Don't let him pressure you and if he continues to do so get rid of him. The right person will wait till you are ready;
2007-04-02 02:35:12 · answer #4 · answered by Black Magic; 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Explain that you do like him but you're just not ready! He really should understand and accept it, but if not he's probably immature and you may have to give him the push before it gets out of hand.
Seriously though, make sure you have explained it to him clearly and if he has any decency and care for you, he will respect your choice.
He may then go off and tell his mates bad things about you because you wouldn't - but you can turn it to your advantage. Say he was a crap kisser and you dreaded to think how bad he'd be at anything else!
2007-04-02 01:48:13 · answer #5 · answered by finch 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey, you are 16...you have several years yet before you should even be thinking about have sex... if your boyfriend can't understand this (he doesn't need to be having sex either by the way) then maybe you shouldn't be with you... if he really cared about you, he wouldn't pressure you... not everyone in high school is having sex... its not a requirement... don't do anything that you'll regret later...
2007-04-02 01:48:17 · answer #6 · answered by Lady Lauren 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stick to your guns, and forget this crap about him saying you do not like him.... If he liked and respected you he would not be pressuring you in to doing something you are not ready to do! WAIT Till you are ready and then and only then consider it and if he can not or will not accept that well he knows where the door is.... you find someone who can and will respect you. Well done for sticking to what you want and how you feel, lots of people your age just get swept along!
2007-04-02 01:51:10 · answer #7 · answered by djp6314 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
run for your life, he is trying to make you feel sorry for him, and manipulating you, trying to make you feel guilty so you can give in to him, to make HIM get his perverted ways, he doesn't give a crap about you if he can't be happy for you for making a very important decision to stay a virgin, that is a very smart, and mature thing for you to decide, don't listen to him, because YOUR not ready, who's the selfish one?HE is the selfish one. You stick to what is best for you body, mind, and soul, sex can be something great, but not with someone who just wants to USE your body. Tell him to go on a date with miss Michigan, Don't hang around him ALONE,,,,,,,don't EVER do that again, that's when he thinks he's GOT you, when there is no one around to protect you. Don't put yourself in that position, You need to find boys who treat you with respect. Tell your boyfriend straight out,,,,NO!!!!!! THEN,
TELL HIM YOU HAVE MADE YOUR FINAL DECISION, AND THAT IS THAT YOUR WAITING TILL YOUR 21
then he will leave you alone.
tell him there is NO NEGOTIATING THIS.
and between you and me, if you found "the one" you can bend the rules, but this is simply to get him OFF YOUR BACK. don't let him manipulate you anymore, even if it is a lie that your gonna wait till your 21,, he is a jerk, and he DESERVES, to be treated like that, after how he has been treating you.
2007-04-02 01:55:26 · answer #8 · answered by . 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stand by your convictions! Any man that is willing to wait is a man worth having. And the guy who is to eager to have sex is far to eager to finish just as quickly. In other words, he would be disapointing in bed. If your boyfriend cannot respect you and your desires, then you really don't want to get close to him at all.
Atrum
2007-04-02 01:45:09 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
tell him if he's willing to wait you'll tell him when you're ready. and tell him if he isn't ready to wait, then you feel he isn't respecting you enough, and ask him to tell you exactly how he feels.
my friend's daughter din't want to sleep with her 1st b/f, they finished on good terms, so he must have been quite mature! now she's with another guy, 18 months together, and few months ago began sexual activities too!!
so, maybe he's The One... you'll know if not if leaves you coz cant have sex.
but DONT have sex just to keep him, it'll end badly.
you hang on to yuor virginity for as long as you want! well done for being strong
good luck
2007-04-02 02:09:01 · answer #10 · answered by hedgewitch 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋