i have had so many problems with my mum. and she was warned by the department of child safety that if she bash another one of us children we would be taken off of her. and then 2 years later she bashes me. what do i do. i have told the cops and i m now in foster care.
2007-04-02 01:09:58 · 11 answers · asked by SXC KRISTEN 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Get professional help to deal with the past and to have a better outlook on your future relationships!
2007-04-02 01:14:18 · answer #1 · answered by Celeste P 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋
You are better off out of there until your mother can admit she has a problem & seeks help. Where are your other siblings? Not still with her I hope. If you had done something wrong, yes you should recieve some kind of punishment whether it be a smack on the backside or banned from watching tv, playing games etc. but never ever a bashing. I don't care how angry you make a parent it doesn't deserve being bashed. I hope you like living with your foster parents and hopefully they will give you the love & support you need to get over this. Unfortunately when I was a kid(a long time ago) my mother use to hit us with a washing stick, shove our heads under water if we wriggled in the bath tub, smash our toys etc. If we told anyone she would make out as though we were lying & that we were bad kids. We were too scared to be bad knowing how she would go off. Everyone including my father would make excuses for her behaviour saying she had a hard time as she was a child in WWII or they just couldn't accept this woman could be so evil. As I grew older she started playing little mind games with us. When I had my own children I vowed I would never be like her & even my own kids thank god I'm not. They don't like their grandmother as she (as the kids put it) she is evil. Her own fault that they don't like her because the only time I left the kids with her she abused them. She hasn't seen them since. Still to this day she will write nasty things in their b'day cards etc. so now they get returned without being opened. I wish you all this best. They say you can forgive and forget. I tried forgiving & that didn't get me far & I know I'll never be able to forget. All the best & accept your new foster family.
2007-04-02 01:53:01 · answer #2 · answered by Vera K 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like your mum has serious anger management issues and needs to goto parenting classes and see a shrink to find a new way of dealing with the problem other than hitting. It's a frustration thing mostly, they can't find any other way to let their frustration go so they turn to someone smaller and unable to defend against their abuse. I'm sorry that you have had to endure such a horrible thing and even though it probably sucks to be in foster care that is probably the best place for you to be, your mum needs to get help and here's hoping that the authorities ensure she seeks help and stops being an abusive person and down the track you may be able to return to her if she completes some sort of course. Good luck for the future.
2007-04-02 01:19:41 · answer #3 · answered by jimmy_chick78 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Firstly, I sympathize with you because I know how it feels because I have a lousy spine due to physical punishments by my own parents.
You have done the correct thing in informing the cops. That is to secure you from unforseen injuries or even death.
Parents impose physical punishment mostly out of anger and in most cases, it is used as a form of deterrence by striking fear. Personally, I do not agree with striking fear into children. A child like you may end up doing something to their bidding out of fear, and not understanding where you have gone wrong.
Do not bear hatred towards your mum. If your mum has been adviced to attend counselling, be there and be supportive of the counselling. That will tell your mum that her children loves her and what she has done is really breaching the line of parental love and discipline.
2007-04-02 01:18:56 · answer #4 · answered by ET 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunate and sad for both of you.
your mum was probably bashed by her parents when she was a child and when things get out of hand now, she thinks it is the only way to deal with it.
with help she can over come this problem, but your main focus should be to make sure you dont repeat this pattern with your futre kid's.
2007-04-02 01:34:34 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
What did you do to set her off? Anything? At times, parents get too frustrated when disciplining their children and react to the extreme. But, sometimes children need a spanking on the backside or a good grounding. All of it should be with some communication included, and not screaming. There should be an understanding for what the punishment is for. I hope your Mom didn't go too far....Where is your father?
2007-04-02 01:22:47 · answer #6 · answered by gone 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I'm assuming that by "bash" you mean physical harm. I think you did the right thing. Letting the authorities know, maybe you and your mom can get some therapy
2007-04-02 01:16:23 · answer #7 · answered by Brett C 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's very sad, but not all parents bash their children...only the ones that don't deserve to have children in the first place...Stay strong, and realize most parents are very loving..
2007-04-02 01:22:33 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Try talking to your school counsellor, they are able to professionally deal with these types of things. If you cant do that speak to a relative that you can confide in and I hope things get better for you soon :)
2007-04-02 01:17:02 · answer #9 · answered by unfixingblowfish 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You sound like you are a baby but since you can write I guess you're not so young.I didn't know in foster care they have computers...So,first how old are you?How old are your bros and sis?What do you want to do?Message me if you need a friend.
2007-04-02 01:17:38 · answer #10 · answered by Janise 1 · 0⤊ 3⤋