So my bf asked me to marry him this morning! But, he hasn't got my ring yet, he said his was getting one, but that isn't what matters. The major thing is that he doesn't want me to tell anyone we know about it until he asks my dad. Do you think he is wrong to ask me and not want anyone to know or do you think it is good that he wants me to wait to tell anyone until he asks my dad if it is okay. AND I already know he should have asked my dad first so don't comment on that plz!
2007-04-01 15:28:11 · 20 answers · asked by wkuchick 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
He did tell me he is buying a ring and has showed it to me. He said since we haven't lived together for a year yet, he wants to wait til we have lived together a year to ask my dad. But that is three months away and I don't think that is fair to me, to ask me but not tell anyone for three months.
2007-04-01 15:50:10 · update #1
We also know when we want to get married
2007-04-01 15:50:49 · update #2
Congratulations, you've found yourself a gentleman! Don't doubt him, be thankful he cares so much about getting your Dad's blessing. He's showing your Dad a HUGE amount of respect by asking him FIRST, before you spill the news to everybody else!
2007-04-01 15:32:30 · answer #1 · answered by Sarah D 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
As I was reading your question, I thought it was OK to wait to tell others until he asked your father for your "hand". This would indicate he has respect for your father. It really is a wonderful tradition. Our own daughter got engaged last fall, and her fiance asked both my husband and I for our blessings before he popped the question to her during a romantic trip to NYC and Central Park. He had the ring with him, so all and all, it worked out very well for everyone concerned. But, back to your situation -- if you are already living together 9 months, and he has the ring picked out; what is he waiting for? It just doesn't make sense to me -- what will be different 3 months from now? I would think he (and you) would know your father would be pleased that you were living together as an engaged couple rather than the way you are now. Hate to sound negative, but there's something "fishy" about all of this... are you sure he's not just "stringing" you along to get you to live with him? I hope not and that you soon will be sporting a beautiful ring with a proud father admiring it!!
2007-04-02 00:26:49 · answer #2 · answered by Adios 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I wont comment on that because not many men still ask dad for their daughters hand. And I can see why he didnt ask him first or buy you a ring because what if you had said no then he'd look like a fool not just with a ring but in front of your father. I personally wouldnt go around telling folks you were engaged until he asked your father, wouldnt want it to get back to dad would ya.
2007-04-01 22:44:48 · answer #3 · answered by texas_angel_wattitude 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Its sweet that he wants to ask your dad. He's a good guy. It sucks that he asked you first though. He just must not understand how hard it is for a girl to keep this kind of thing a secret. I think that he should go ahead and ask your dad. What's the hold up really. He is waiting for his own time frame?! That doesn't make a whole lot of sense to me. Let him know how you feel about this. Tell him you aren't worried about the ring, but that he really should go ahead and ask your dad so that you can start telling people. Let him know how excited you are. Hopefully he'll understand.
2007-04-02 11:30:11 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Does your dad have a phone, or live in the same vicinity as you? How long does it take to ask your dad? Give him a couple of days and if he still hasn't asked your dad tell your dad yourself. Does he have a job, is he in debt heavily? most guys pick out a ring ahead of time if they are planning on getting one at all. Don't let it go on too long and congratulations and good luck!
2007-04-01 22:43:59 · answer #5 · answered by ann m 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your decision to get married should be just between the two of you for now. You'll just have to be patient and wait till he's asked your dad, then you can go public. Till then, it's an exciting secret.
Although I'm sure some of your friends will be wondering what the big smile is all about and they may guess!
.
2007-04-02 11:58:25 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Wow one that's want to ask the fathers blessing. You got a great one a keeper. You should honor what he has asked of you. 3 months isn't that long. And just think of how excited you'll both be when you do tell everyone. He's just making sure he's doing things the right way for both of you. You honor him believe me you'll get it back in the long run. Congrates.
2007-04-02 08:49:52 · answer #7 · answered by dee g 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You sound a little on the immature side to be getting married. Stop being so worried about the ring and what's "fair" to you and look at the big picture here. You've got a gentleman who cares about what your family thinks of the arrangement. The rest will come soon enough. Be patient.
2007-04-06 17:31:30 · answer #8 · answered by Rio 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think it is fine for you all to not have to share your engagement yet. Soak it all in three months will go fast and sometimes you need those wonderful moments to your self. He sounds like a great man and a gentleman enjoy the moment while it last before every one else finds out cause it won't be the same after that. Congrats to you all.
2007-04-05 18:08:12 · answer #9 · answered by princessa674 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can decide you want to get married and actually get engaged later. See if he's willing to forgoe the "wait until its been a year" and just have him talk to your father soon. Most men DONT ask thier girls fathers anymore and i think its sad. I would wait to call yourselves officially engaged until hes talked with your dad and bought your ring.
2007-04-01 22:57:38 · answer #10 · answered by DanielleNichole 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋