What does he want?

Question

John sleeps with younger women. John is 63 and is treating a 64 year old female, Mary, colleague like dirt. Talks to her as if she is stupid. Talks to her as if she has no choices. John is angry at Mary because Mary is helping Tina, 35 year old colleague.
John calls Tina stupid, retarded, piece of sh*t. Tara and Mary both make less money than John. John cries a lot at work. John spreads a lot of rumors at work too.

What's going on with John?

Answer 1

John has women issues on top of a lot of other personal interpersonal relationship problems, hence an inability to connect emotionally with himself or the people around him. So John acts like a kid, he has been doing it all his life, he is 63 years old, John isn't going to change.... Also he has develop'd this way of sexualizing females, so when he meets ladies that he can't sexualize in a way that makes him feel in control he does the only other thing he knows, and belittles them. That way he is still in control. Its harder from him to sexualize ladies he's age not because he is old, but because he doesn't respect himself enough to be able to relate at the level of a 64 year old. So when he sees others that can, he brings them down to his maturity level. The real fix here is for the ladis to turn it around on him. Anyone who is over 21 years of age using terms like stupid, retarded, peice of sh*t is lacking a lot of maturity. So keep pointing that it isn't your guys fault that he can't relate with people on a mature level and do what you can to ignore him. That would most likly hurt him more then anything because deep down he is motivated by a strong self hate that makes him feel that others well abandon him if they knew who he really was... which is the catch-22 if he wasn't trying to push people away he would most likey be pretty good cat. So ether you let him push you away or you start confronting him on his issues....