My Gram (Mom's mom) died about 3 weeks ago and we live like 16 hours away from her town and so we saw her maybe like once a year, if that, i feel like a bad grandkid beacuse the last time i saw her was July, I have a lot of regrets and i feel so bad all the time because i should have called her more! what do i do now?
2007-04-01 05:24:43 · 12 answers · asked by Hayley 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
you are grieving....guilt is a natural part of grieving...learn from it..my dad died I spent two years thinking all the way's I could have been a better person to him..now I try to treat everyone as if I may not see them again....I make sure I always say I love you and whether I should die or someone I love...I try to make sure I stay on good terms with all people..cause you really never know...I'm sure your grama was not upset with you...they are old enough to understand that 16 year old girls have a life....they already learned to let go and not hold onto people so tightly when there kids left home .when their spouse died..or there mom and grandma...your grama did understand and didn't die upset with you...she wantn't want you to be unhappy...as a mom I think about if something happened to me how it would hurt my kids...my grama tell's me how she worries about the effect her death will have on the family,and she is close...grama would have been worried about hurting you and your mom...not about anger or herself..she did know you loved her ....she was 16 once and probably cared more about friends ,boyfriends and life than hanging out with her grama...hope this helped a little...dying is a part of life..love the ones you can..your mom might need some love now..
2007-04-01 05:37:34 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Oh, I understand what you're feeling. My aunt died last year, and I regret not seeing her more, and she lives in the same city!! Did you tell her you loved her, the last you saw her? Then keep in mind that she knew you did, and that it's ok. I always told my aunt I loved her when we talked, and when I saw her, we always hugged. So don't feel bad, she knew you loved her. And she knows you still do. Keep in mind the times you were together. You'll be okay. Hugs to you.
2007-04-01 06:48:02 · answer #2 · answered by cyndi a 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let her rest in peace, dear.
She won’t be happy seeing ur suffer.
I know u r so sad that u lost her, but nobody lives forever.
Don't punish urself so hard, sweetie.
It's always like this; we regret for many things we've done when we loose someone we love.
Remember her funny and clever and don't be sad.
The best u can do for her is to pray for her peace; I'll do it as well.
God Bless u!
2007-04-01 05:39:24 · answer #3 · answered by Panther 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You learn from this, you thank her for having given you that learning opportunity and you make sure it does not happen again.
This happened to me with and old couple I regret not having seen enough. As a consequence I have built a strategy to be as close as I can to my grand-mother. And I have also spent time with my mother when she past away prematurely. I know that meant a lot to her and I am pleased I had learned in time.
2007-04-01 05:33:36 · answer #4 · answered by Claire 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
why not write your grandma a letter. say everything you wished you had said to her before she passed.
it's very normal to have regrets or guilt after someone close to you dies. even if you did everything you possibly could for them.
if you believe in heaven, remember that when one dies and goes to heaven, they are all knowing and all forgiving. they hold no grudges. relax. your grandma knows.
god bless
2007-04-01 05:34:31 · answer #5 · answered by racer 51 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you dont need to regret after all shes at the destination right now and i'm pretty sure god is taking care of her now. so whenever she is i guess she's quite ok there.. and you dont need to feel guilty because if she's seeing you she'll say "you dont have to worry you're just making me sad cuz you do."
is that better? i hope you overcome it..
2007-04-01 05:30:12 · answer #6 · answered by argylyme 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nothing, its not like your grandma is holding a grudge against you because you didn't talk to her or see her more. I think eventually the guilt will pass, but don't worry she isn't mad at you.
2007-04-01 05:28:47 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
don't keep beating yourself up about it..all you can do now is learn from this..tomorrows not promised to anyone so just take the most out of all your loved ones now. That's just how we all are..Many of us don't appreciate or should i say realize what we have until we lose it. Its just life!
2007-04-01 05:31:37 · answer #8 · answered by Amusing but confusing 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
just tell yourself it wasnt your fault because it wasnt i know how u feel this has happened to me before. what u r feeling is normal and it will eventually go away these things just take time.
2007-04-01 05:30:24 · answer #9 · answered by gin & juice fo da # 1 stunna 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
oh 1st of all i feel sry for u ...hope u feel better ..i think should be busy and keep doing somethin ..not be idle n waste ur time..coz if u be idle u ll keep remembering abt ur grandmother...
dats all i can say
i am sry abt ur grand mother
2007-04-01 06:02:54 · answer #10 · answered by Smarty 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋