my dad is getting delpoyed please help!!?

Question

ok i am really close to my step dad. he is getting deployed april11th. what can i do to help me cope with him leaveing. everytime i think about him over there i start getting teared eyes. how can i be strong for him knowing where he is going. please help

he is in the army. he is currently a Sgt first class

Answer 1

Hey, hang in there and do the best you can. You've received some really good advice so far so I'll try not to repeat anything.

Specific help for kids include activities at the youth center if your base has one. It's a good way to keep busy and hang out with other kids who are living through the same things you are. They don't always focus on the military parent but it can help to have those ties when you need to.

You might also visit http://www.whoknewdeployment.com/. It's a site designed for military pre-teens and teens. The password is MillitaryParent. You might have your mom and dad look at the site, too, so they can pass the information on to any other parents.

You also might look into the summer camps from Operation Purple. They are free and at places all over the country. They're for any military children with a bit of a preference for those who have a parent currently deployed. They are choosing the campers sometime soon. You can get more information and register here: http://www.nmfa.org/site/PageServer?pagename=op_default?&from_www.operationpurple.org

Other than that, take things one day at a time. Try to be there for your mom but know that she's there for you, too. Together you'll make it through this.

Answer 2

This is a hard question to answer because like some of the others who've answered, I've been deployed, too. It's hard to leave your family behind for any length of time because deployed dads worry about their kids at home. The best thing is to stay with your daily routine. Go to school, do your homework...all those things you do every day while your dad is home. But, like the others said, write him as often as you can. Let your dad know that he is missed, and loved. Know that he will miss you and love you, too. Every day. Try not to count days, though. Sometimes things happen to make the Soldiers have to stay a little longer than they originally planned. Counting days leads to anxiety, then anger on both parts if plans change, so be flexible. When your dad comes back home, hug him and hold him, tell how much you love him and that your glad he's back. Then have a great big party! Remember that it takes a little time to adjust to normal family life again. You were living apart for a while, so it takes a while to get things back to the way they were.

Answer 3

My husband left three weeks ago...we are best friends and our son who is 4 cries about missing daddy and when ever he heres the door to the garage close or open he says yayyy daddys here, no matter how much i explain...so, with that said, i am not sure of your age, but i really cannot imagine what it is like having a parent have to get deployed. It tears me up emotionally daily still but i have to keep a happy mask on for my little guy to support him and I do hope you have that support. Do not hide your feelings, you are going through a true sense of loss and have every right to your feelings of sadness or anger and then maybe even guilt about being able to cope but you will need to get on with day to day life the best you can.

The BEST advice so far is keep writing to him over and over!!!!!! Also realize there are some things that he can or cannot tell you whether he wants to or not, he will likely not be able to talk as long as you would like him too when he does call either.

Stay strong and keep yourself busy, talk with things openly with your mom, write your dad often and be honest with your feelings! Take care and you are not alone!!

Answer 4

Realize that he is a hero and that you must do your part too by being strong.

During the (way too) many times that I left home for overseas, I realized that my family were heros too,but in a different way. That is why now whenever I see the spouse of a deployed person, I thank them for their service to their country, the same way I thank service personnel for their service.

Be strong and write often! Mail call is the best time of the day (for those who get mail) and the worst time for those who do not get any mail.

Even short note about nothing important means so very much!

Answer 5

I hate to be the downer, but I just want to tell you to be careful about the personal information you post on the internet. While it may seem like something small (like the date you listed as April 11th), information about you can be pieced together and used against you stepdad, his unit, etc. Just say "soon" never use an exact date. I am sure your stepdad can tell you more about OPSEC.

But to answer your question, you dont always have to be strong. My husband has deployed twice and will again "soon" and we all cry and talk about how we feel. As soon as he is able to contact us once he gets there, then we all feel better. It is hard, but be proud of him and his service and know he will be back very soon.

Answer 6

Be proud of him. Be strong.
Ask him to email you if he can. or at least write.

Write him every day, even if it's nothing more than," Dear Dad, mom bought some root beer from the store. I was thinkingof you when I drank some, because I know how much you like it."

Mail call is soooooo important.

What s he, Marine, Army??? Let us know!

Answer 7

My brother is over there already. I talked to him this evening online. Can your dad type and use a laptop? This is a permanent account(e-mail, IM and 360 page) if you need my help, or just someone to talk to, I'm right here. I can help, have some information too. With as many soldiers are there, you and your dad are not alone. I have found some friends online too.

Answer 8

oh Hun am so sorry that you are going thru this...are you in a mil. town, I hope that you are in some ways as many of your friends would have already been thru this or are facing this about the same time as you do.

Either way, the best thing you can do is be a strong as you can for both him and your mum.........remember its just as hard if not harder for her as she has the kids to worry about, doing all the normal stuff and seeing her man go off whilst keeping a brave face on things for everyone else. So be as good as you can for both of them, no extra stress really helps.

Get your mum to let the school know about your dad going away so if a few assignments go adrift then it sort of helps [dont use this as an excuse more of a back up plan]

If you wish to please feel free to email me off line as I have not only seen my own father go off, have also dealt with my husband and now my son going so can certainly feel for you.

Regards and lots of prayers going your way, get ready for LOTS of writing bright chatty notes and cards to him.

Answer 9

I don't have any personal experience with this situation so I'm not sure what to tell you. But I will say a prayer for him and for you. Be strong, and be proud, your step dad is an honorable man.
Blessings

Answer 10

Know this. Be proud of your dad. Our nation is proud of him & ALL who serve our military here at home & abroad (especially in Iraq & Afghanistan). I don't know who he is or who he serves with or under, but I sleep well at night knowing your dad & all in uniform are doing their best to keep our great country safe. If there are other people whose loved ones are deployed, reach out to them. They in turn will reach out to you if you are in trouble. You are not alone. Whatever you do, do not think that you are alone. You are not. America stands with you & your family & all families of U.S. military personnel everywhere around the globe.