my youngest son and his girlfriend of a couple of years want to move in together. They both work and are a sensible couple. however they need a gaurrantor and have asked me. I didnt hesitate and said i would. what gets me is her parents and their respective partners and my ex husband and his wife, wouldnt entertain the idea at all. Personally i cant see the issue here, i dont see anything wrong in helping your kids when you can. am i a soft touch? would you do it? P.S we none of us are millionaires and are probably all on parr (or there abouts) financially.
2007-03-30 21:09:55 · 19 answers · asked by oldybutgoody 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Well, someone's gotta give them a chance, and it looks like you're elected. Just make sure they know what they're getting into, and warn them that you're not an emergency fund if something goes wrong.
2007-03-30 21:26:30 · answer #1 · answered by knight2001us 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Depends on how much you are going to be guarantor for and considering worse case scenario can you afford to lose this? I'd probably do it myself. I trust my son completely. The only problem is that you have to trust his girlfriend the same amount as if she caused problems and they split she'd be entitled to half yet you are still guarantor? Does he definitely need a guarantor? Can they not save for a while? This is a very difficult situation as mums and sons is a great relationship but yuo really need to make sure that you are financially secure.
2007-03-31 06:08:34 · answer #2 · answered by Jackie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think they are just acting that way because they dont want to! My mum and dad were guarantor for me and made it clear what their conditions were and it was fine. They had to pay my rent once when i wasnt very well which they didnt mind other than that no issues. I do have a friend who took on being a guarantor for her friend and she ended up having alot of hassle so unless you trust the person and they are family (respect you) you should have no problems.
Good luck xx
2007-03-31 04:20:58 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes i would definately. The young kids of today need all the help they can get. The market is so highly priced that they dont stand a chance in any other way!
Your other family members either dont have any trust or faith in them as a couple or like you say, are skin flints!
Hope it all works out for them.x
2007-03-31 04:14:51 · answer #4 · answered by JustJem 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are taking a risk and as with any other you have to decide whether it is one worth taking. You will be 100% responsible for any debt. You have obviously considered that all things considered it is a risk worth taking and the other parents have decided it's not. I wouldn't hold that against them. You have the trust in them and they have the support they need in you and that's all that matters.
2007-03-31 04:20:18 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If it wasn't for my boyfriends parents we wouldn't of bought our first house they had to sign for it.We were married 6 months later.They didn't hesitate to help us.You are doing the right thing how could you not and live with yourself.I help my son when ever he needs it .
2007-03-31 04:46:53 · answer #6 · answered by Teenie 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
everyone has different attitudes, i personally would be all for helping my family, im sure they dont want it to fall on you any more than you do! i would definately say you are not a soft touch, youre just a mum who wants to help her son! as long as you stress to your son and his girlfriend that you dont really want to end up paying for them, but youll help! hope it all goes well!
2007-03-31 07:00:47 · answer #7 · answered by tequila_girl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i would help my kid get a place the other respective parents obviously made a desicion that would benifit them and never concidered how important it is that their children learn to be responcable and having their own house is a part of that proccess. i say good on you.
2007-03-31 07:42:25 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have done it before and come unstuck but Hey, its family,so I know that I would do it again. I have always believed in sharing as a family unit, so if one is struggling, we all help anyway.
2007-03-31 04:32:35 · answer #9 · answered by david t 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no your not a soft touch, your just loving mum that wants to help, you would be if you got every thing they want, but your not and we should not worry about the others. i would help my kids if i could that's only normal.
2007-03-31 04:18:39 · answer #10 · answered by sweettinks 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋