There is this young lady, who is my best friend. We have known each other for 2.5 years. We are really close, and share each others secrets. The problem is I have fallen for her. I have tried at least 5 times to make this relationship more than just friends, but she does not like me in that way. During these 2.5 years, she has gone out with "losers". She keeps getting her heart hurt by these dum-dums. She talks to me about them and about the idiotic things they do to hurt her. Sometimes I just want to say, "Stop dating these idiots and be my girlfriend!" What should I do?
2007-03-30 20:21:38 · 21 answers · asked by bigtwan_76 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
"I can't make you love me if you don't.
I can't make your heart feel somethin' it wont."
- Bonnie Raitt
You've tried FIVE times, which is not "lost" it's "obsessive."
She *doesn't* like you that way. Period. Women are often attracted to losers and bad boys because they have low self-esteem and do not believe they deserve better. There is no way for you to help her see that. She must learn it for herself.
Even if she decided she liked nice guys it doesn't mean she would have romantic feelings for *you*.
I'm sorry, but you need to move on. And please don't be stupid enough to fall for her if she gets jealous over you dating some other girl. Those are never genuine feelings, just basic human jealousy.
2007-03-30 20:31:55 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
You need to say to her :
" I want to be your friend , but it's hard for me . Why don't you just give us a chance ? I love you . I cannot sit by , and quietly watch while you get your heart broken to pieces . Lets just open up , and see what happens . We have nothing to lose , and everthing to gain . And no matter how it turns out in the end , we will be much closer . What do you say ? "
P.S. You need to swallow your pride and go for it - or you might just lose out on the best chance you ever had !
P.S.S.You can even change the words to fit how you would say it . And if it doesn't get you her - at least you will still have your friend . And you can start some real dating ! Good luck , Huggs , Shannon
2007-03-31 03:31:52 · answer #2 · answered by NotSoPerfect 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take a chance. Tell her you have seen all the drama she has gone thru and you think that she needs to be with a good man. Friends make the best lovers b/c you have a great foundation. If you take a chance and be straight up, no beating around the bush with her and she still doesn't want to be with you then tell her you are still going to be her friend, but don't be her doormat. Move on, life is too short to waste your time on someone that doesn't feel the same. Take a chance. You never know until you try.
2007-03-31 03:27:26 · answer #3 · answered by famurattla 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Her type is losers. Until she grows up a lot, you have little or no chance with her. If you want to take a long shot you might try the following things. Make sure you are assertive and NEVER put up with her being late or flaking in any way, don't go out of your way to be with her and in fact don't make time for her unless you really want to see her, and joke about her taste in men; as in, "wow, what a catch. He almost has a job. You guys make a cute couple. He should be proud to show you off on visitors' day."
2007-03-31 03:38:24 · answer #4 · answered by Nels N 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Whenever she wants to talk to you about these guys, tell her you really don't want to hear about it. She is treating you like a girlfriend. If she keeps telling you that she does not want a romantic relationship with you, then consider the fact that she really means what she says. Otherwise, you will just be a shoulder for her to cry on, and you'll be hearing about her boyfriends for a very long time, and you won't have the romance you seek. Take a chance and say what you really want to say to her, and look for someone else if she is not interested.
2007-03-31 03:41:30 · answer #5 · answered by Darin P 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
she is already having clear idea about her filling for you she is attached with you just as a friend and shears her experiences with you which does not mean that bad experiences from others will prove you are the only best option for her be her friend and why do you want to be a person for some buddy's special person because she get hurt by others .
wait to get some one who loves u . if some one loves you because others are bad to her it means she will go away if some one will attract her by more smart and sympathetic way then you so it is in your hand to love a person home you know do not love you actually but you like her and you want her or to Waite for some one who actually loves you because you can never full your self and you even get this person after knowing the fact that she is not in love with you then her small natural behaviour in future my let you to be Rudd to her and you my become a person who will be responsible for making booth's life miserable.l
2007-03-31 03:56:15 · answer #6 · answered by priyanka j 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
well she is your best friend.....if you know all about her and you guys share secrets that means alot.....but maybe you are not her type.......go ahead ask he she might be the one for you.....but remember one thing this can also be dangerous for you friendship....taking chance is a good thing you must do it, but if you are not sure and she might not want to be your friend then dont you are loosing a good friend.......you must see what she like and she if you like her from the inside then that is true love....but if you like her for her body that is just not good reason but just see what happen....time will solve everything
NISX
2007-03-31 03:30:51 · answer #7 · answered by Nisx M 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Unfortunately this happens alot. Just be patient if your meant
to be together it will happen naturally. These things can not be forced. Try making her jealous by going out with someone if she has any feeling towards you that is when you will find out.
2007-03-31 03:28:28 · answer #8 · answered by vixxie2002 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
The only thing I can say here is open your mouth and tell her how you really feel. then take it from there. At least that way you'll know where you stand.
2007-03-31 03:31:35 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Since she is your best friend open up to her and
tell her the way you really feel about her, and that
way you will know weather to back off and still be
her friend but not intimately.
2007-03-31 03:31:29 · answer #10 · answered by RudiA 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋