It hurts so Much....?

Question

i liked this girl last year.....i loved her....; i had a very low self esteem and i was acting very stupid, after getting her msn....talking stupid......i steal her pics from her friends space and she finds out(i showed her, i dont know what i was on..).....and then she is pissed off and says she is afraid of me( i didnt even look at those pics, not lying); i tried to apologize for a year now but she is always around friends(who i hate), and she ignores me.....till now my stupidity haunts me....im despise myself...i really loved her, i found her very attractive but also very unique to me......i see her with a guy(talking to him...walking home)... and it feels like getting stabbed in the heart, i feel he is better than me, it reallly hurts......
im 16, she's 15 or 16 maybe.....answers are appreciated, but im letting my emotions out that i was holding inside...

Answer 1

Good start. The fact is that your dealing with the same problem you had before you met her. Your low self-esteem. See the problem with society today is that we think happiness is the responsiblility of this "true love" that we spend all our lives hunting for. Its a falso ideal. The fact is the human heart is capiable of loving just about everyone and everything given enough time and motivation. The problem comes thou that we shouldn't give our hearts out tell we've learned to love ourselves. Which is what your learning. See you were able to be happy with yourself for the frist time because you had this girl in your life, the problem came thou that you weren't really happy. Thats why you did the stupid things you did. You can't expect someone to make up for your own leg work. So now not only do you still not give an f about yourself but you also have this experience to beat yourself up about. Its not a fair thing your doing to yourself but its the price we pay for our parents letting MTV raise us more then them.... your best fix of all, get a best friend. Trust me you need some one to be a friend to you right now and that well hopfully teach you next time that your lover has to be your friend to. Don't give some body special rights in your life just because there welling to have sex with you.