Should I financially support my girlfriend?

Question

My girlfriend and I live together, and when we were talking recently, she told me that she's getting tired of her work ( she's been modeling for several years ). She said she doesn't get much fufillment from being a model any longer, and she wants to stop.

This career is what she's been doing since she was 14, and she doesn't really have anything else lined up, she only has a high-school diploma.

I'm doing pretty well myself, and we have been together for more than 2 years, living together for 20 months. I was considering making the offer to support her, becaue she means alot to me and I want to help her, especially since I know she wants out of that career and I know she loves me.

So, how do you feel about this? .... Ladies, how would you feel about the special guy in your life supporting you? And guys, how would feel about doing this for your special girl?

Thanks to all who answer.

Answer 1

Agree on a reasonable vacation. Two weeks or a month should be sufficient to help her get her batteries charged. She should sign up for at least one college class at that point, or get at least some part time work. Let her take just one class that first semester. That's a very light load. It will allow her to rest, but will keep her productive. People actually get depressed when you remove ALL the structure from their lives. If she doesn't want to go to school, then insist that she volunteer or get a part time job somewhere.

Set the expectation that after her first semester, she will do more. She can take additional classes, 2 or more at a time. She can take a combination of classes and a part time job. She can do temp jobs, so that she's not always working, but is working occasionally. If you don't mind if she doesn't earn money, then she can volunteer. Volunteering at a hospital can provide some experience in a hospital setting, and can help her find work later. There are tons of hospital jobs in every city, and many favor those with some experience working in a hospital or with patients, and volunteering counts. As a volunteer, she might have more control of her schedule, and be able to work out a part time schedule.

If she works or goes to school part time for a while, that would allow her to help you out at home, making your life easier by contributing to some household chores. When two people both work full time, it can be hard to get everything done. Having one person working or going to school part time can actually reduce YOUR workload, if she is prepared to take on some of your share of the housework.

This could work out really great for both of she uses this opportunity to do new things, but if she uses this opportunity to do NOthing, then it could lead to disaster. You can steer it in the right direction, by allowing her some more freedom than her current job allows, but also providing encouragement for her to stay active and productive.

Please, don't let encourage her to sit at home without a job or school. She needs the structure and the social interaction to stay healthy, even if she doesn't realize it.

Answer 2

That is pretty iffy, you would know better than anyone else though. I can tell you this, be prepared to make that commitment for the rest of your life with her, in which case, you might as well marry her.

I mean really, detatch yourself from the situation. If person A offers to take care of all finances for person B, what chance is there that B will go back to work, at least for a while. The only thing that could drive them back is finding a new passion or desire.

Your call bro, but I am not sure I would make that jump just yet. How about suggesting follow-up jobs, maybe something in the modeling industry, like an agent or rep???

Answer 3

She's been working since she was a child, and has her high school diploma, meaning she must have been working for several years now. Modeling is a difficult job, and it is easy to get burnt out. If you can afford it financially, and you mind, then feel free to go ahead and do it. However, if you can't afford it very well financially, maybe suggest a compromise: she work part time while looking for something else or taking classes, and you help out more than you have been doing. I think she would be understanding if you can't or don't feel comfortable enough to fully support her financially, because by compromising, you would be showing her that you supported her emotionally.

Answer 4

If she has been modeling for years she should have a nice sized nest egg put away. Sounds like you might be ready for marriage. As long as you don't feel used supporting her is OK. What about her getting an education so she can find work she likes in the future. We all have our moments and would like someone to just take care of us. That is fine as a part time thing but I would not recommend it for a permanent thing. Would you want to continue to support her if you should split up?

Answer 5

I personally would not want to be supported by my bf. This does not mean I would not appreciate the offer during a difficult transition, and I certainly would be willing to help him out. I however, would not be willing to support him indefinently unless he was also making some sort of contribution, (ie chores, volunteering, etc) Relationships should hold some sort of balance between power. If you feel confident and financially secure enough then you have the right to do whatever you want! I just hope she appreciates it! And understands that what you are doing for her means a lot!

Answer 6

You should support her in anything she wants to do... and if she is beautiful enough to be a model then I would do it or someone else will. She is probably going through a phase and will be ready to do something else soon like go back to school... volunteer. Suggest one of those to her. It is fine as long as she isn't sitting at home watching soaps... but if she has been active for some time (since she was 14) then she probably wants a much needed break.

Answer 7

I think it's a great thing to do for someone you love. I would encourage her to go back to school, volunteer, or take even some fun classes in photography and arts. That way she might spark an interest in something else. If you have the opportunity to let someone you care about get out of a job they don't like and be able to pursure something that would really give them fufillent (whether it's work related or not) go for it.

Answer 8

I'm sorry I would never expect a boyfriend to financially support me unless I was sick, hurt, pregnant w/his child and all this is temporary (only if we lived together in committed relationship/or married) That's very nice and responsible of you. If she is in search of another opportunity(school/career) then this okay for time being. This is probably all she needs anyway-but life is short she better get on it. Sounds like you love her-bravo to the good guys out there(just wanting to is awesome-so maybe you should offer :)

Answer 9

Honestly that is a bad situation. I could never sit back and enjoy the fruits of someone elses labor. She is still young right? She can still take classes and find a job that doesn't require a degree. I think couples need their own sense of accomplishment in the relationship and job satisfaction plays into that. What would she do if she quit? She would come to you everytime she wanted to go shopping, her hair and nails done...and so on.

Answer 10

I would advise her to find some post-secondary education and a truly fulfilling career path, and not to depend on a man. More often than not, it's a recipe for disaster. Besides which, this is 2007. Women can be self-sufficient now.