My neighbor, who I don't get along with, keeps sending her kids over to play with my kids. They get off the bus together and my kids and her kids make plans. Then they come home and ask me if they can play with the kids a couple of doors down. I say no, but shortly afterward, her kids ring the doorbell. I've sent them home on numerous occasions, telling them to have their mom call me about playing. She never does. Today they came over three times before I finally relented and let them play a half hour. Her kids are 2 years younger than my kids (her 8 year old plays with my 10 year old and her 5 year old plays with my 7 year old). How can I get this to stop without being rude? I don't like the age difference and I don't like her older boy's behavior.
2007-03-30 10:49:47 · 26 answers · asked by gelba 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
walk outside.. go to their door. knock it.. and tell them to stop sending their damn kids over.. and tell them that you think its rude.. there problem solved
2007-03-30 10:53:03 · answer #1 · answered by Yhpargotohp 3 · 3⤊ 1⤋
My mother is a stay at home mom. She is always complaining that the neighbours think that because she doesn't work that they can use her for free babysitting.
One mother down the street sent her two kids over every day. The kids would stare in through the door until my mom would finally let them in. Telling them to go home did no good. Telling the mother to call and make sure it is okay for her kids to come over did no good. They would come over as soon as school let out and stay until 8 or 9 at night, eating my parents out of house and home, making a mess of all the toys, bullying my brothers and sisters, and just generally being brats.
Understandably, my mom did not want them there as they were mean and disrupted family activities, but it was impossible to get rid of them. Finally, one day my littlest sister stood up to the neighbour girl and told her that she didn't like playing with her because she was mean and broke all of her toys. She told her to leave and never come back. So the girl took her brother and left, and as far as I've heard they have not returned.
If those kids won't listen to you, then get your kids to tell them to leave. Sometimes kids listen to other kids where they won't listen to adults. If all else fails, you could always tell the mother that next time it happens, you will charge her with trespassing and harrassment, though hopefully it won't come to making legal threats.
Good luck!
2007-03-30 11:26:11 · answer #2 · answered by Venin_Noir 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, I think that especially if it is only 2 doors away and she won't call you, you should just march on down there and have a little chit-chat.
It is hard when there are kids in the neighborhood that you don't want your children to play with, but you do have a right to not have a bad influence on them. Even if you think it may offend her, just tell her some of the things that you do not appreciate about how her children behave. You can try to do this with the minimal insult.
Maybe say something like, "I know that everyone has different ways of parenting and different levels of what they believe to be acceptable. I have just found that our family's values don't seem to match up with yours. I would really prefer that our children don't play together. Could you please not send them over to play at our house?"
I am not sure what it is that you don't like about the older boy's behavior, so I can't address that directly. Just think about it and find the kindest way to address the situation.
If she really gets mad, that is her problem. You have a right to protect your children from things you don't agree with. Good luck!!
2007-03-30 10:59:45 · answer #3 · answered by animal lover 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I have this issue with the kids i look after. they want to play with other kids and so i have enforced a no friends til mom is home rule. when the kids make plans without me or their mom's knowledge we say no to the plans right away and the girls are slowly learning to ask before they make plans. you could also send a note home with the neighbours kids explaining that you would appreciate a call to set up play dates so you can plan ahead for snacks or activities. good luck.
2007-03-30 11:46:59 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try letting your kids meet new kids that they could play with and if your neighbors kids come over tell them that you are about to go out to buy something or make up an excuse.
2007-03-30 10:54:31 · answer #5 · answered by A.J.L. 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well, I would tell you to just let them play with your kids except you mention that you don't approve of the older boy's behavior. I guess you will have to talk to your neighbor.
2007-03-30 12:10:09 · answer #6 · answered by iiiglowiii 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are the adult there. Tell the children to go home and not to come back. Close the door - end of discussion. Period.
You and your children are not baby sitters or a day care for your neighbour's children. Particularly since you are not being paid to watch out for a minor that you dislike.
If she keeps sending them over, and you cave in, send her an invoice (inside a sealed envelope) with her children on their way home, $15.00 an hour for each child.
2007-03-30 12:02:49 · answer #7 · answered by Pacifica 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Tell them to go home, I mean it is your house after all. So stand up and tell the kids to leave, then go to your neighbor and tell them that you don't appreciate her shipping her children off just because she doesn't feel like dealing with them. Do not let them walk all over you, it is your home and your kids, tell her, or it will never stop.
2007-03-30 10:53:38 · answer #8 · answered by Muffin 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
This happened to me and I sent the child home with a note stating that I charged $10 an hour and she should send CASH the next time she sent her kids over for me to watch. It never happened again!
2007-03-30 11:00:38 · answer #9 · answered by bevrossg 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
well what that mother is doing is very rude I don't think it's nice of her to send her kids over cause she doesn't feel like parenting. I would go over to her house and tell her what she's done that is rude and maybe work out a plan so that your kids go over one day and her kids come over another. I hope that work.
2007-03-30 11:00:15 · answer #10 · answered by lizzy 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Isnt that what they make bear traps & stun guns for LOL?
Ya know... maybe there is just the off chance that yer kids & thier kids just get along and like each other and they arent really concerned in yer petty lil war between the parents and realy dont give a **** (Could happen)
2007-03-30 10:54:56 · answer #11 · answered by darchangel_3 5 · 2⤊ 1⤋