Should I move in with my boyfriend?

Question

Me and my boyfriend have been dating for 2 years and will make 3 years in December. I will be 18 in May and be able to move out. We both want to live together and feel that it is the right thing to do. Part of me is still unsure though because of my parents. My mom doesn't like the idea and I don't know what to do. I will move out regardless but I want to make sure I am not making a mistake. We love each other deeply and want this so bad.

Answer 1

star for u! im having the same problem now. well, im trying to convince my mom first so she doesnt get so worried/

Answer 2

Not to sound like a mother either but I don't like the idea either. You are still too young to move out. When you move out you take on a lot of responsibilities. Gas, Utilities, Water, Power, Trash and just regular maintenance. And on top of all that you have to put up with your boyfriends actions and reactions and mood swings and if they might clash during your "time of the month phase". And when you feel like you can't take it anymore you or him might want to leave and that would not be fair to the other person because they're going to have to pay the full month to month rent that was already split from the get go. Trust girl you don't want to make that move yet until you know that you are financially stable and if worst come to worst you can fend for yourself and not depend on ANYONE else. And if you do end up moving in with him then take everything that I have said into consideration. I wish you the Best of Luck!

Answer 3

I would wait a while. I have lived with boyfriends in the past and things are pretty crazy when you do.

You of course are your own person. I think you should do what feels right because 1. you could be right for each other and it would be the beginning of something great, or 2. it might not work but you will gain a lot of knowledge, wisdom and experience from the situation.

I will be 22 next month and would not live with a guy unless we got married. It sort of leaves a level of excitement and anticipation to be around one another more often, you know?

Answer 4

Do you two have jobs? Are you going to be able to support yourselves? Consider rent, utilities, phone bills, groceries, toiletries, and many other things. Keep in mind that having major responsibilities could put a strain on your relationship. I was married at 18 and divorced by 21. I wasn't emotionally or financially prepared. Think about it a lot and do all your research. Have a plan and if you are confident that you can do it, I say go for it. Look at every issue, education, employment, housekeeping and anything else you can think of. There is nothing wrong with being independent. Also consider that if this doesn't work out, you will have to go back to mom, do you want to mess up that relationship if it's possible that you will have to fall back on them?

Answer 5

Would you trust your well being and future with this guy? Would you trust him to be around all of your possessions, and have complete access to your personal information?

Trust is the most important element in any relationship. If you have certain doubts or areas of concern with him, or if you feel that they are small enough to overlook, then live your life.

Don't let your parents wants interfere with your needs, so long as it is done in a respectful and courteous manner. Speak to them openly and ask for realistic advice, not negative comments.

Living together even with a friend can be quite challenging, but it will definitely be an experience that you will never forget, and possibly the start of something that you feel is the best choice for you right now.

Just use precaution and common sense when sharing bills, signing contracts, and maintaining responsibilities around the house. Be firm, be fair, and be honest to both yourself and to him...good luck.

Answer 6

you may think it is the right thing to do now but in the future you may regret it. if u r deeply in love and are sure that things will work out then get an apartment and wait until you get married before you move in because if things end up not working out between the 2 of you then the hardest thing would be moving your stuff out or seeing the other persons stuff vanishing. Marrige is a thing that lasts forever so wait until you get married so you know you will be together forever.

Good Luck

Answer 7

you probably aren't a bible toting person and don't really care what it says. but never the less, there is some very good wisdom in it. you are punished by your sins and not for them. you being a young fresh flower, should try to live a clean life while you still have the chance. most middle aged women seem to demand more respect than they are entitled to . the reason for that is the choices they made at your age. they did things that negated their self respect. they see themselves as dirty and unclean, they are being punished by their sins. sure , you will get to phuck at your leisure when you have your own place, but beyond that, not much is to be gained. when b/f ditches you, you will have to move back home anyway. and don't think that crap, we love each other too much. he won't do that. he will do that once he is living with you, and yes he would do it if you were single or married, but you are a nubile female, without any experience. people don't always end up like they start out. if you really got to get out of the house, get a housemate that is female and learn to be on your own before you start depending on someone.

Answer 8

There is no "should" to this. It's up to you. However, as someone who went from Mom's house, to being married (at 19) I would suggest you live on your own or with roommates for a while before moving in with a boyfriend/lover.

You're just becoming an adult, your life is about to change quite a bit, and you need time to get used to those changes and being somewhat independent. I think it'll make a big (positive) difference for you down the road.

A large chunk of my personal growth took place when I was living on my own, supporting myself, and single.

Answer 9

I think that the thing that you should be worrying about is the financial aspect and whether you are financially capable of moving into an apartment. make sure that you have a plan B, three months rent in your bank, along with a savings plan, and some extra money for other household expenses. Parents laugh at children who move out and move back in when they can't afford the costs.

Answer 10

give it a shot. but know why your mother is nervous. Think about what would happen if you broke up, who would stay and who would go? what about all his annoying friends? what about sharing the same bathroom..this means he will smell the air after your morning poop. are you ready for that? then also think about waking up after a nightmare and having him cuddled next to you. If your going to move out regardless, think about who else you would move in with. I understand both sides, and moved in with my boyfriend 6 months ago. Its great, but you cant hide ANYTHING. nothing, and when your fighting its hard to get away when you both have to climb into the same bed at night. think about all the money issues and the cooking of dinner, the washing of clothes. its a big step, bigger than you think. but of course its sweet. and if you can make it work, it will bring you much closer together because of the intensity. good luck girrrl

Answer 11

DON'T DO IT first get everything straight before you move in here is the list....
1. Finish College
2. Have some college fun
3. Drink it up really hard on your 21st b-day
4. Graduate from college and get a good job
5. Get married if his still around
6. Buy a house
7. Have a child
8. Last but not least LIVE HAPPILY EVER AFTER : )
good luck in completing the list