I am feeling really down today and I would appreciate some words of encouragement. My boyfriend told me on Monday that he is not happy with me and he needs time to think and he will call me this week to talk about it. Today it's Friday and I still have not heard from him? He has been going through major changes in his career, looking for a new job as he is not happy iwth his current job. And since then things have not been good. he has become distant with me, which obviously made me worried. I really want to call him and ask him but then he said he needs time to think? What should I do please?
2007-03-30 06:14:56 · 15 answers · asked by Elisa N 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I have been in this situation before, and I know how frustrating and stressful it can be. First of all, you mentioned a lot of stuff going on in his professional life, and it's very possible that all of that stuff has him moody and even depressed. For a lot of men, success in his career directly translates to a successful life. So he may be struggling with his goals and self-esteem right now and treating you poorly because of that. If that is the case, I suggest you call him and see what's going on. It's not fair to you to leave you uncertain of your future together as a couple. When talking to him, mention that you are concerned and realize that he is upset. Ask if there is anything you can do to help with his current job search. He needs to be able to see you as part of the solution, not another issue he has to deal with. I hope this makes sense and things work out. If he is unresponsive to your call, or gets more upset when you talk, I would definitely suggest some time off from the relationship. This added stress and frustration in your life is not fair. Realize that you deserve someone who treats you with respect, regardless of what they are going through. Be strong, make the call, and be ready to handle whatever comes. Hope this helps! Good luck!
2007-03-30 06:28:17 · answer #1 · answered by Brookealli 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have a right to talk to him about where things stand, but in my observation it doesn't look good. The talk about changes in career and being unhappy with his job are just a pretense for his overall state of dissatisfaction with things, which may or may not include you. It is quite possible that he is either too scared or too lazy to break it off with you, and he may try to manipulate you into being the one who breaks things off.
Bottom line is: you are entilted to know where you stand with him. Call him. Don't let him string you along.
2007-03-30 13:18:59 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know what it is like to be in a relationship with someone and completely devoted and in love with them. But when it is not a mutual connection you are going to end up with a broken heart anyway. Let this one go. Also, he is probably seeing someone else. I know I don't have proof of that, but the reaons he gave you regarding why he does not want to see you anymore are not substantial. Move on there are more fish in the seam.
2007-03-30 13:21:06 · answer #3 · answered by Challenge 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well i think you should tex him and let him know how you are thinking of him. let him know that when he is ready he can call you. also let him know that you will no wait around forever. tell him you love him and you definitly need to talk. sometime relationships dont workout after a "time out". i mean really whats the point of a time to think if you are even going to talk about the problem just leave. if there is a problem you shouold talk it out and not run away. good luck.
2007-03-30 13:20:50 · answer #4 · answered by Christina 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just give him time. Men always act on things when they think they are ready. I think your boyfriend needs time to be alone. but if this goes on for more than a week give him a call and tell him u are wondering what is going on with him.
2007-03-30 13:19:34 · answer #5 · answered by daniella 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Can't make someone want to call or be with you. If he truly loves you, he will call and if he waits too long, maybe by then you will have decided that you are not someone that he can turn on and off when he has problems or is busy. either way, let it alone and wait it out because by pushing him he may come around, but do you want someone to be with you because they feel like they have to?
2007-03-30 13:20:29 · answer #6 · answered by Frankee06 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why don't you send him a funny card to cheer him up and let him know that you have his back. Since you love him, tell him that you can only try to understand him, btu that you would rather give him time to himself to reflect ion what he needs to do, but to realize that you are there for him for when he needs to talk or just to vent out. Also, why don't you send him a gift certificate to a restaurant he likes and tell him that he deserves to go and enjoy dinner on you, but to know that after dinner, he needsa to go thank you in person.
2007-03-30 13:23:10 · answer #7 · answered by djrisk75 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Aww..I'm sorry! Hang in there girl, My boyfriend is doing the same thing right now..I'm really confused too. But hey, if you do break up or something, I guess it's just not meant to be. Take some time to focus on your friends and do something for yourself..You'll be okay:)
2007-03-30 13:20:50 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow.... sounds to me like things r pretty Rockey in ur relationship. I think u need to give him some breathing room and see what happens...... its not the end of the world, they're more fish in the sea...... time heals all wounds.
2007-03-30 13:22:33 · answer #9 · answered by pokvet 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
DON'T CALL. He will call you when he is ready. You need to give him this time, and he's told you that. If you call you are only putting more pressure on him and it will blow up in your face. My guess is he will probably call Saturday, maybe Sunday. Either way, let him call you.
2007-03-30 13:18:36 · answer #10 · answered by Elvira 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋