My daughter who just turned 7 years old was outside yesterday playing with her friend "J" who is 6.
"J" took something that belonged to a mutual friend of their's and my child said she would tell "J"'s mom if she did not return the item.
"J" got mad and bit her very hard on her upper arm. My daughter then showed me what happened.
I was pretty shocked at the extent of the injury. Here is a photo:http://pg.photos.yahoo.com/ph/lorelei.siren/detail?.dir=/df3ere2&.dnm=8d7are2.jpg&.src=ph
The picture makes it look milder than it really is. Now it all blue and red and my daughter's teacher thought she was bitten by a dog instead of a kid!
I cleaned it with soap and water and put antibacterial ointment on it. I checked that my child's tetanus shot was up to date and it is.
I went and told "J"'s mom what happened and showed her the arm. She wasn't that concerned, she didn't even punish "J". That made me mad!
Am I overreacting? What next..go to the dr.? Talk to "J"'s mom again? Thanks!
2007-03-30 03:47:37 · 17 answers · asked by lorelei.siren 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
To the 13 year old who said my daughter deserved this for being a snitch - First off, "J" STOLE something from someone who was supposed to be her friend. My daughter was trying to be a good friend and to get that item back. How does that make her a snitch? "J" shouldn't have taken it to begin with!
I know kids will be kids and have arguments and fight. But, for me, this went a little too far. No matter what my daughter said to her it does NOT excuse this kind of behavior. You can seriously hurt someone by biting them. This is not like a small kick or slap.
And for people who thought I was acting like "J" had rabies - I'm not that unintelligent. But, I do know that mouths harbor a lot of bacteria and a lot of diseases can be transferred through saliva, especially in humans.
And for the rest of the people who actually gave me some good advice, I wanted to say thank you for taking the time to answer my question! I appreciate it.
2007-03-31 04:20:33 · update #1
It was very hard for me to pick a best answer as I thought quite a few answers were excellent.
Thanks again for the great advice!
2007-03-31 04:25:47 · update #2
Unless the bite starts to swell and get infected I would hold off on actually going to the doctor since you already checked the status of her shots and she is up to date. As for the mom, I am sorry for you and your child that she neither showed or taught any remorse for her childs actions. That makes me kinda concerned for that childs future if she is has no consiquences now! I also don't know if I could allow the children to play together, it would be hard to when one child has boundaries and one clearly does not. Talk to your child and let her know that what she did was right and ask her how she feels about playing with that child in the future, she has every right not to want to play with her. Also remember that it may not all be the other little girls fault. It sounds as though her mother is to blame too for lack of teaching wrong from right and if she is refusing to teach a lesson from it then I promise it will come back to her! To you mom: you are doing a wonderful thing for your child. She is very lucky to have a mom like you. As a mom myself, thank you for raising another kid out there I wont have to worry about. She seems to be a great girl who won't have a problem finding other friends.
2007-03-30 04:50:10 · answer #1 · answered by DREDAY 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
A 6 year old is much too old to need to bite to get a point across. If she were a toddler it would be different. I wouldn't bother talking to the mother again, she's obviously not concerned enough about the situation, it will just frusterate you and the situation. It doesn't look like the skin is broken and if she didn't bleed, I'm sure she's ok and will not need shots. The only way she could contract any diseases is if there was fluid exchange which it doesn't look like there was (I may be wrong). It sounds like you did enough First Aid in the beginning, it should be fine. My daughter was biten on the chest by a complete stranger at the mall when she was a toddler, he literally just walked up to her for no reason and chomped on her. It looked very similar to your daughter's. She cried her eyes out but was ok. Doctor did not need to give her any shots (to further traumatize her!) because no fluid was exchanged. DO NOT let your daughter play with this friend for a while (Love & Logic) it's a logical consequence for what happened and if they are friends, she will miss her and next time they get together maybe watching a little more closely and remind the kids of kind ways to talk to their friends and use words to work out disagreements. As I said most 6 year olds should be beyond using extreme physical violence out of frusteration-they should be taught to use "words". Not a good influence on your daughter.
2007-03-30 11:11:00 · answer #2 · answered by MommyTaylor 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If the mother of the other child will do nothing about this it is in your child's best interest to not have her play with that child again. It may also be a good idea to make a official police report on this as it was an assault by a minor and parents are suppose to act on this. If they do not,you should, not only for the sake of others but so the child learns "now" what is not acceptable behavior. At this age they should really know biting is not tolerated.
2007-03-30 10:54:44 · answer #3 · answered by JAN 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I dont think you are overreacting....you should go to a Dr. just in case it could became infected after all our mouths harbor a lot of germs. Also, after going to the Dr. you should talk to the mother of the other child about compensating you for the bill and hopefully she will punish her daughter accordingly. It is one thing for a child to bite when they are 2 but, at 6 that is very aggressive and disturbing behavior. Anyhow the bite to me look very painful.
To all those who think you are overreacting about this are ignorant! Biting is unacceptable behavior for a 6 year old bottom line! And for the mother not to punish her shows you what kind of parent she is! This poor child will probably grow up to be menace to society because if she is not corrected at this young age then she will figure she can get away with most anything!
2007-03-30 10:53:56 · answer #4 · answered by missbellacherie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
omg that is a bad bad bite and for the mom not to care that is horrific! go to the doctors for sure and dont let your child play with "J" for a while...talk to the mom when the kids are at school and tell her that this isnt right look at my daughters arm...and ask what she would do if that was her child.
2007-03-30 10:51:52 · answer #5 · answered by 12121212 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
ask your daughter what she wants to do
maybe she doesnt care as much you do
if she does care and she doesnt want to play with j anymore just dont make her
tell the mom that if it happens again then they just wont play anymore
tell j this to
and you know what
kids bite it happens it could be much much worse
i personally would have grounded my daughter and paid all medical expenses
2007-03-30 10:58:26 · answer #6 · answered by squeaker 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would calmly call the mother and tell her that since she took no action in disciplining her child that the child would no longer be welcomed as a playmate, and tell her that quite frankly that you are appalled that she showed such little regard for your child's injury.
2007-03-30 10:54:00 · answer #7 · answered by Maria b 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Just do not allow your child to play with J any more. Some parents do not believe in discipline at all, hence why J is the he or she is. Do not pursue it any farther, it will just make you more angry.
2007-03-30 10:59:02 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i would go to a doctor just to be safe and yes talk to the mother again and tell her how concerned you are about the situation
2007-03-30 10:50:45 · answer #9 · answered by huff 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I personally think that's what she gets for trying to be a snitch but that's just me. What do you think you do? Treat her arm. Waisting your time on him obviously won't work.
2007-03-30 22:52:07 · answer #10 · answered by lol 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋