Does the vast majority of pain in a person's life comes from resistance to what is?

Question

I.e it is not the actual event or situation itself it is simply the inner resistance to the event.

For example, if it is raining outside and you become miserable is the rain causing your misery or your inner resistance to the rain.

The point of this is that if we are able to let go of this inner resistance, to just completely accept the rain as a part of what the present moment requires, will there be less suffering in our lives.

I have been trying this recently and have found that a lightness and a bounce has come back into my life. Three weeks ago I hurt my leg and was bedded for a week. I just accepted it as part of the present moment and offered no resistance to the situation. It passed peacefully and I actually enjoyed it as I had a time to read and relax.

Before I tried this I would have been caught up in a state of misery at my fate, stuck in bed for a whole week!

I would have been resisting the present moment.

What do you think?

Svetlana - Maintaining a positive attitude and trying to convince yourself of the positive merits of the event is to me another form of resistance. You are resisting the present moment and trying to cover it up with something positive.

That is not what I am talking about. This is something different which I have been feeling but find hard to describe in word.

It is about complete acceptance of the present moment and not judging it as good or bad.

Its hard to explain.

Arebel - I see your point but I am not saying that action cannot be taken to rectify a situation.

I mean if you relinquish inner resitance to the situation, you may still have a desire to change that situation, but your action will come from a deeper place of calm and will be more productive.

There will be no attack or defense and you will probably get a better result.

Accept the situation for what it is - then act from a deeper place of non-resistance.

For example, with my leg I did not just give up and think, oh well and not bother taking any medication. I accepted it, then took actions to rectify it by resting and medication.

Now I am waffling. I am not trying to sound like a smart a*s or anything, just something inside I have been feeling recently and wanted to get off my chest.

Thanks for listening.

Answer 1

Well, the old saying:" It all depends on how you look at it" certainly applies, doesn't it. You're right. Looking at the glass half full instead of half empty has always been more uplifting. Some people can't help being pessimistic, like myself, or my former self. I make the conscious decision to look at the bright sight and it has helped me too. I am calmer and more relaxed.

Answer 2

There is no past and there is no future there is only NOW. I have a friend who lives by this rule and she embraces what ever life through her way. She is always happy even though she does not have much in material possession she respects mother earth and recycles everything she buys. She believes in one God many different faces. She does not care what people think about her.

I always want more MORE money, clothes, better house, bigger car and better holidays. I dress to impress and show this wonderful lifestyle to other people hoping they would think hey look at that guy he is so lucky. To have all this I have to slave away every week, month, year and life time. To die at a respectable age be cremated and have my ashes thrown into the wind on top of Table mountain in Cape Town.

A lifetime planned out to the very last detail NOW would it not have been better to live in the NOW.

Answer 3

You brought up a good point. This is a fine example of the expression, "Accentuate the positive, alleviate the negative." When we look for the "good" in a bad situation, we tend to be in a more positive mood. When we look at the situation for what it is and complain about it, we realise that complaining only makes the situation worse and is unproductive.

Keep up the good mind set and you'll actually change your brain chemistry to the opposite of a severely depressed person. In time you'll constantly think positive without any effort just like the people of Tibet.

Answer 4

I think you are right to a certain extent. Relief and comfort can be found from accepting rather than resisting. afterall, we only cause ourself stress and pain by trying to fight. But I can't help but view this as a slightly defeatest, learned helplessness philosophy. Imagine if we just accepted everything that happened as "what the present moment requires" Where would drive and enthusiasm go.

Answer 5

there are two choices in life, acceptance and resistance. As we mature we are less likey to resist because we see the whole picture of what our whole being represents to us in a conscious sense.
what makes rain a depressing concept??
"programming"
what makes rain acceptable and harmonious???
"wisdom of the cleansing values and properties that rain has in the whole scheme of our existance relating firstly to our survival and secondly to the cleansing symbolism it holds.
resistance is a choice and the lightness you have found is "humility" and "harmony" , two things that will allow you to grow spiritually.

PEACE AND LOVE

Answer 6

Absolutely right. Once you accept the rain, your example, you will either be at peace about it or you might see the up side. It's a win-win situation.

Answer 7

The resistance is caused by the expectations we have and life's disinterest in fulfilling these expectations that we have.

The universe gives us exactly what we need but it is seldom what we think that we want.

Love and blessings Don

Answer 8

I think you are absolutely right. And what a damn good, well thought out question.
If this is your usual kind of philosophy then try reading some Buddhism. Reckon you'd be suited to it. Try the lighter stuff though. The text book stuff is a bit deep and heavy.

Answer 9

The benefits of maintaining a positive attitude is hardly a revelation.

Answer 10

The mind is a very interesting thing isn't it? Changing our thoughts can surely change our mood or attitude. How complex our brains truly are.......

It's more proof of our Creator