How can I keep him interested in me? Does she still love his ex?

Question

I met with one guy in Chat. We are chatting and emailing each other for 5 months. We live in different countries. He worked in my country for 1 year but then left. When we starting chatting he already left, so we never met each other. I think I’m in love with him. He tells me lots of private things, but he never told me that he had a girlfriend in my country. Then I found it myself and he confirmed. He got very angry when I met that girl and started begging me, not to tell her anything. He keeps repeating that he broke up with that girl and he doesnt love her and that he doesn’t keep in touch with her, but I am afraid he still loves her, cause he all the time says how important she is for him and that he still cares about her. He doesnt want to break up communication with me, but I am afraid that’s because he is afraid that I will tell her everything. What do you think does he still love her? What should I do to make him forget her? She is much more beautiful and sexy than I'm.

Answer 1

There are only two reasons why he would be mad that you talked with the ex-girlfriend: 1) the girlfriend is nuts and she will tell you lies, or 2) he has been telling both you and her lies.

I say talk to her. You don't have to tell him you did. (No, you are not being bad if you don't tell him.) Maybe if the girl was not mad at him when he left the country, she is okay. If so, just talk some with her and see what she says. You can see if he said the same thing or not to both of you. If you find he has been lying about most of the stuff, you may not like it, but you must not marry him. He will tell lies after he is married, too.

Now, on to "does he still love her": That is not important. What is important is if she loves him. If she does not love him, it doesn't matter if he loves her because he will have to get on with his life without her.

What can you do to make him forget her? I think only time can make her memory grow dimmer.

Answer 2

If what you're saying is true about him then without a doubt he is still in love with her. He may have started chatting with you to find a friend not necessarily a love online. I don't think you can do anything to make him forget her but what you need to think about is - what are you willing to put into this relationship and does he deserve my love since he is not in love with you. If you just follow your heart regardless then prepare to be hurt. Perhaps by being a good friend you can win his heart but you must be a good friend first and you must be sincere at that. Only time will tell if he really loves you or not. So don't be hasty be patient. Be a good friend.