another guy problem.....Please answer?

Question

okay, I'm going out with this guy. Obviously not a problem....yet. But....please don't judge me....he is my friend's ex-boyfriend. Is it okay to go out with a friends ex. And one more thing. Something happened and my friend said that he was lying, then he said that she was lying, and then one of my closer friends said that she was lying, so who do I believe. So could you please answer the questions not meanly....Thank you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Answer 1

date the guy...she does not own him and you have every right to date him. it sounds like your girlfriend is lying, which most often is the case. if the guy is nice and treats you well go out with him, if your frined cant understand that its time to leave her ***. i dated my bestfriends ex 2 weeks after they broke up, my buddy had no problem with it because no matter who it is they should not be able to come between us, but if they do you seriously need to review your friendship with her. she does not own the guy and should not control your decisions.

Answer 2

No offense, i'm sure you're a good person and all. But really, dating your friends ex? That's just all sorts of wrong. It's a betrayal of your friendship. And doesn't show you as a very loyal person to anyone but your own feelings.

My advice is don't date this guy. If he's willing to betray everyone as well. You really don't need that sort of relationship.

Find someone out of your group of friends. It avoids drama and conflict. Trust me.

I'm not being an asshole. But I had a a similliar situation. My ex girlfriend cheated on me with my best friend. They were together for 3 years but there was constant conflict between the three of us despite us all remaining friends. Everything falls to **** in the end. And usually the girl gets the blame (Or in this case the person who allowed things to go the way they were going)

Good luck, yo ^_^

Answer 3

I have a rule:
if my friend dates a girl for a month and i start dating her 5 or 6 months later, then it's fine (it's happened more than once -- where I dated a girl for 2 months, broke up with her, my friend dated her six months later for about 4 months, broke up, five years later, i took the same girl out on a date, lol)

but if my friend has been dating said girl for 6 months? 8 months? a year? as the time gets longer you get more and more over the line of "never allowed to date this girl, ever, forever off limits!"
the rule for me usually depends on whether or not this friend had an emotional attachment to the girl.

if my friend had a serious attachment to a girl she is forever off the dating-possibilities list.

if my friend dates a girl for a year, they go on trips together, he tells me about how he loves her, etc etc, and then i go date her, this makes me a REALLY BAD friend.


so you be the judge. imagine you were her.
if she's a good friend to you, you probably know how serious she was about the guy.
there's no time-based rule written in stone, since the timeline i laid out at the top of this response is all dependant upon level of attachment

Answer 4

You are free to make your own choices, its just a tough situation to get yourself into. I mean, it probably hurts your friend, maybe more than she is letting on. Is he really worth dating with the consequence of putting strain on your friendship? I've been in that type of situation before and I regret it totally. It usually doesnt last and isn't a very....fulfilling relationship. As for the lying, maybe they are both lying to turn you against the other. If the deal isn't important, alienate yourself from the conflict and take no part in it. Good luck girl.

Answer 5

It is her ex . So he has a right to search for his happiness any where he finds it. If he find happiness dating you she (if she is a friend ) will be happy for both of you.
As far as the lying goes Let them know you don't care . Yopu will judge him and her by how they treat you. I he does not lie to you then you can believe him from now on the same thing with her. Tell them both youwill judge both of them by your relationship with them and nobody elses.
As long as he is honest with you that is what counts.

Answer 6

Going out with your friends ex bo is sure to raise the hairs on the back of someones neck... and of course lots of drama to go with your scenario....he said, she said...always loses something in the telling of the story and makes for better drama....your friend is going to feel you jilted her and betrayed an unwritten law amongst women that you do not do their ex...the rest is just drama...and your the star

Answer 7

You have to think about who would be most likely to lie to you. And why would you other friend have a reason to lie to you. I would have to go with what your boyfriend and your closer friend said. I hope I was of some help to you.

Answer 8

ok so how close is this other friend, and how long did they go out for? it its not very long and you guys arent like best friends then it shouldnt be a problem shes probly just jelouse and u will have to go with ur gut on the other one and if more than one person is saying its her it could be. try talking to her about it but dont be mean about it just talk to her about it and see if u can work it out.


p.s. please help! answer my question if u can

thanks!

Answer 9

Dont mess with him why would u want someone your friend had its like men tend to play wit women who r friends and it seems like they have already begin move on that your friends leftover u no they go bad after a few days.

Answer 10

Is it okay to go out with a friend's ex, you ask.

No, and what you stated after that is why.

That's all.