Need a good excuse why im not going to be able to make it to a wedding. The wedding is for a guy that ive known since I started college. I live with one of his close friends. We arent best friends or anything more like acquaintances that sometimes hangout. One of my best friends is the guy he lives with. We graduate in 1 month, so I still see everyone alot... I am not in the wedding, his wife scares me....
2007-03-29 10:04:22 · 18 answers · asked by Financial Guru 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Send in the RSVP with a no, and if he pushes you about it, tell him you already made plans for that day, that you cannot back out of. You really shouldn't have to say anything more.
2007-03-29 10:13:00 · answer #1 · answered by Proud to be 59 7 · 0⤊ 3⤋
You are making a mistake. Don't run away from phantom fears. So what if his future wife is a bit scary. She may be magically transformed by her wedding day. Here is a story to illustrate:
One day, my mom was talking about someone who was mean, sneaky, and thoroughly unpleasant. I got in on the middle of the conversation, so I asked who she was talking about. When she told me it was my uncle, I asked her to explain, because this guy was the nicest, sweetest guy you could ever meet!
It turns out that before he got married, he was everything my mom said he was. But my aunt transformed him... almost overnight. He was a completely different person, and the old bitter person simply vanished into thin air. The change was not just complete, but permanent.
If you make up a phony excuse, this guy will find out eventually, or he will always suspect it. You live with one of his best friends, and one of your best friends lives with the groom. It's not exactly like you'd be sitting on the sidelines twiddling your thumbs.
Go to the wedding. Be gracious to the bride. Look her straight in the eyes and tell her you wish her every happiness, and try to mean it. That means, saying it slowly, and purposefully, not just rushing through the words as you would with, "What's up?"
Who knows? You may end up being best friends.
2007-03-29 17:19:38 · answer #2 · answered by pachl@sbcglobal.net 7 · 0⤊ 2⤋
If you really dont want to go then dont go. I think they would rather you trust your gut than make yourself and those around you miserable by showing up. His wife is going to be dragged in every direction for pictures and dances and everything else, if she has the TIME to scare you, then honestly, I want to know where she found that time (I am trying to figure enough time to talk to my guests, cut the cake, dances and photos....). You wont be able to lie to the person you live with so talk to him about it, tell him how you feel. But if the thought of going is making you want to jump off a cliff, then by all means, rsvp no and send a card and gift. Dont make yourself sick over something you dread thinking about, this isn't supposed to be a final exam in thermodynamics...it's a party!
2007-03-29 17:17:19 · answer #3 · answered by Nicole 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If you really don't want to go, tell him that you can't make it, however, keep in mind that you'll most likely run into them again so be careful about what you tell him.
The truth of it is, even if you go, you're not really going to spend that much time with the newlywed couple so you might be able to avoid his wife altogther that day. You might as show up and eat if for nothing else. You can always bag out early if it's really bad.
2007-03-29 17:39:52 · answer #4 · answered by soccerref 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What ever happened to telling the TRUTH! You're both adults, he will understand. You said that you are aquaintances so on his wedding day, he will not be wondering where you are. If he does notice that you're not there, he will get over it. There is no reason to make up a lie b/c he probably won't miss you. Just tell him you can't make it and apologize. Its silly to lie about it.
2007-03-29 17:18:10 · answer #5 · answered by kapy 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
"thanks for the invite, however i will not be able to make it. I wish you the best luck"
he shouldn't have to ask you why, but tell him the truth if he does.
If the person is really your friend, then you should be honest with them. An excuse will only come back to haunt you in the future. Find an opportunity to talk to them and tell them your reasons for not wanting to go or why you may feel uncomfortable going.
2007-03-29 18:41:13 · answer #6 · answered by Ashley 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Got a job interview
Have another wedding to attend
Have unrefundable tickets (airplane? ballgame? concert?)
Going on an already booked vacation
Have college papers to turn in
Going home for graduation
GF or parents' anniversary
You dont have to explain. RSVP is more than enough.
Send your RSVP and gracefully decline the invitation "due to schedulling conflicts". No explanation is needed or is necesary.
Good luck
2007-03-29 17:12:11 · answer #7 · answered by Blunt 7 · 0⤊ 3⤋
Don't lie - just tell them you cannot make it. If you lie, you could end up getting caught at it and that will hurt feelings more than just saying you can't go. Actually, if they have not requested that you RSVP, you don't need to say anything ahead of time at all. If asked just say, I won't be able to make it.
2007-03-29 17:14:10 · answer #8 · answered by c_n_s130 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
If you have already said that you were going and they have paid for your food, its not really nice to back out unless it was a real emergency. In cases like this, you should never accept the invitation. In my opinion, the right thing to do is make an appearance.
2007-03-29 17:16:10 · answer #9 · answered by Scarlett 4 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Why don't you want to go? You said yourself your friends will be there. Have fun, his wife won't bother you..she will be too busy greeting everyone and talking to relatives & friends from out of town.
2007-03-29 17:12:00 · answer #10 · answered by Tearful25 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋