Girlfriend: And are you sure you love me and no one else?
Boyfriend: Dead Sure! I checked the whole list again yesterday
Waiter: Would you like your coffee black?
Customer: What other colors do you have?
Manager: Sorry, but I can't give you a job. I don't need much help.
Job Applicant: That's all right. In fact I'm just theright person in this case.
You will see, I won't be of much help anyway!!
Dad: Son, what do you want for your birthday?
Son: Not much dad, Just a radio with a sports car around it.
Diner: I can't eat such a rotten chicken. Call the manager!
Waiter: It's no use. He won't eat it either.
Diner: You'll drive me to my grave!
Waiter: Well, you don't expect to walk there, do you?
Husband: You know, wife, our son got his brain from me.
Wife: I think he did , I still got mine with me!
Man: Officer! There's a bomb in my garden!
Officer: Don't worry. If no one claims it
Within three days, you can keep it.
2007-03-29 09:24:06 · 10 answers · asked by ||| Romeo Boy ||| 4 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
Father: Your teacher says she finds it
Impossible to teach you anything!
Son: That's why I say she's no good!
2007-03-29 09:24:30 · update #1
good ones...
1
Fresh from her shower, a woman stands in front of the mirror complaining to her husband that her breasts are too small.
Instead of characteristically telling her it's not so, the husband uncharacteristically comes up with a suggestion. "If you want your breasts to grow, then every day take a piece of toilet paper and rub it between your breasts for a few seconds."
Willing to try anything, the wife fetches a piece of toilet paper and stands in front of the mirror, rubbing it between her breasts.
"How long will this take?" she asks.
"They'll grow larger over a period of years," he replies.
The wife stops. "Why do you think rubbing a piece of toilet paper between my breasts everyday will make my breasts grow over the years?"
"Worked for your butt, didn't it?"
He lived. And with a great deal of therapy, may even walk again..
2
Man driving down road.
Woman driving up same road
They pass each other
Woman yells out her window, "PIG!"
Man yells out his window, "*********!"
Man rounds next curve
Crashes into a huge pig in middle of road.
Thought For The Day : If only men would listen.
3
The mother-in-law stopped unexpectedly by the recently married couple's
house. She rang the doorbell and stepped into the house. She saw her
daughter-in-law standing naked by the door.
"What are you doing?" she asked.
"I'm waiting for my husband to come home from work," the
daughter-in-law
answered.
"But you're naked!" the mother-in-law exclaimed.
"This is my love dress," the daughter-in-law explained.
"Love dress? But you're naked!"
"My husband loves me to wear this dress! It makes him happy and it
makes me
happy. I would appreciate it if you would leave because he will be home
from
work any minute."
The mother-in-law was tired of all this romantic talk and left. On the
way
home she thought about the love dress. When she got home she undressed,
showered, put on her best perfume and waited by the front door. Finally
her
husband came home. He walked in and saw her standing naked by the door.
"What are you doing?" he asked.
"This is my love dress" she replied.
"Needs ironing." he said.
HEHE>>HAVE FUN 2 YA GUYZ READING
2007-03-29 10:15:17 · answer #1 · answered by ashanie4mhell 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i liked the birthday one best, my birthday's in 12 days if you wants to get me a radio with a sports car around it! Your funny, keep telling jokes.
2007-03-30 12:09:00 · answer #2 · answered by Nish 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Good ones! Funny! Ha Ha! 10!
2007-03-29 18:10:11 · answer #3 · answered by cats 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
lol here is a random redneck joke
-you might be a redneck if your family tree does not branch!
and
now
for
some....
blonde jokes! ^_^
-how do you get a one-armed blonde out of a tree?
*wave to it
-how do you drown a blonde?
*put a scratch & sniff sticker at the bottom of a pool
-how do you confuse a blonde?
*put it in a circular room and tell it to find a corner
-how does a blonde confuse you?
*when it comes out of the room and tells you it found one!
2007-03-29 16:39:15 · answer #4 · answered by evilbackpackgirl 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
those are great 10
2007-03-29 16:41:15 · answer #5 · answered by gregs111 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Good collection of giggles!
2007-03-29 16:54:57 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Lol good jokes!
2007-03-29 18:16:52 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
ha ha those r so funny i am rolling on ground ....right.....nowwww!!!! yay i am third
2007-03-29 16:40:55 · answer #8 · answered by ℜoy and Zooted♣ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Very funny. Loved them very much. Please tell us more.
2007-03-29 18:45:52 · answer #9 · answered by clsmlbkl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
lol.... funny jokes!!
2007-03-29 16:33:07 · answer #10 · answered by casey 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋