i told my mom im signing the lease to my apartment tomorrow and she told me that im not moving out... i will be 19 in june and she is trying so hard to control everything i do. im an adult and i should be treated like one but she doesnt. is there absolutely anything she can even do to keep me here? i am for sure leaving i just dont want her to do something like call the police on me or something....
what is your advice?
thanks
2007-03-29 07:46:18 · 22 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
you are an adult at 18, you can make your own choices and decisions. there is nothing your mother can do.
2007-03-29 08:06:19 · answer #1 · answered by nwnativeprincess 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well being that your 18 and will be 19 soon there is nothing she can do. she can call the police all she wants but they will just tell her that theres nothing that they can do. your an adult. Now you just need to sit down and have a talk with your mom. Tell her not to say anything until your done talking and then she can say whatever she likes. Tell her that your an adult and you feel like its time that you be on your own. That you feel like your more than capable of paying your own bills and taking care of yourself. Tell her that you appreciate her for loving you so much and for being concerned about you but you will be fine. Tell her to give you the chance to prove that she's a responsible adult now and not a little child. Tell her just because your moving out dosent mean that you cant still come and see her everyday and that she may give you any advice she feels necessary and you respect her opinion but your an adult now and you are moving out she can either be happy for you and let you go or sit back and watch and tell her that you love her and you will always be her baby. Its probably hard for her to accept that your grown now and about to leave the house. she will come around give her some time but also do what you feel you have to do. good luck on the new apartment.
2007-03-29 15:02:50 · answer #2 · answered by tcameron_2004 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She can't stop you from leaving, even if she calls the police. There is nothing they can do. You have the right to leave and she has to accept that. However, you should try to leave with her blessing. Sometimes they know what's best for us and we can't see it until it's too late. Are you sure she is not doing it for your best interest? Why are you in a hurry to leave? If you must go, then go, sometimes we have to leave to grow up. I think if you leave and are responsible she will come around. All you can do is reassure her that you will be responsible and take care of things like an adult. She'll be mad, but eventually she'll get over it. If she doesn't, love her still and move on....
2007-03-29 15:28:45 · answer #3 · answered by Gigi 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know you won't necessarily understand this now, but you will one day. Your mom is hurting, she's losing something she has loved, cherished and worshiped. She given up things just so you would have a better life. She's worked very hard for the last 19 years to give you everything you need, and now you want to leave her. She's hurting. Be respectful, and try not make it any harder than it is. Yes, you may be old enough to live on your own, but you will always need your mom. So give her a big hug, tell her you love her. Ask for her advise. After you get settled, ask her over for coffee and ask for her advise on decorating and making your new place a home. She knows about such things. Be good to her, she's the only person you can really count on to be there. Good Luck!
2007-03-29 15:03:28 · answer #4 · answered by Alterfemego 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Legally there is nothing she can do. You are of age. She can't call the police, they would tell her she was barking up a tree that don't exist.
Now if u want to keep some relationship with your mum, u need to convince her that it's right for u to make your own way. And she needs to understand that she ain't losin u, but that u need independence. I'm thinking good communication now....and after u leave, will work it out. It might take some time for her to accept it tho.
Good luck on this. Parents can be so difficult at times. I guess it's paybacks for when us kids were difficult eh.
2007-03-29 14:58:25 · answer #5 · answered by Travis M 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why are you so desperate to move out? If it is for personal reasons I can understand-I moved out of home aged 19, because my stepfather was abusive, my mum tried to stop me, but failed. I didn't want to stay in a house I didnt feel welcome in.
Any other reason then talk to her. Explain that you have the money to do so (as long as you do) and that she can't stop you. Ask her why she is refusing to let you do so. She may be scared about loosing you, she may be feeling like you have thrown her hard work back in her face by moving out of her house as soon as you could, or there may be another reason. Whichever it is reassure her that you are not rejecting her, not being ungrateful for the sacrifices she made for you, just explain that you are an adult, and need your own space.
2007-03-29 16:33:32 · answer #6 · answered by Katie C 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have every right to move out... keep in mind you need to support yourself and be an adult, she can do anything legally, you are an adult, she can call the police but, you have the legal right to be missing and the police will not do anything because you told her you are moving out so she knows where you are.
YOUR AN ADULT... live your life
except if she is giving you money
2007-03-29 16:18:58 · answer #7 · answered by lulubelle55555 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is nothing your mom can do to force you to stay in her house. You are an adult. You might want to think long and hard about this though. What if you need her for help financially down the road? She might tell you too bad if you move out now against her wishes.
2007-03-29 15:00:42 · answer #8 · answered by crabbyone 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My mom did the exact same thing to me and it ruined my relationship with her.I never realized till I was a lot older that she was very possessive.I would suggest you give her as little information as possible in regards to the move.You have to be the bigger person here and not give into her demands or her needs.Keep calm when talking to her and reassure her firmly on your intentions.If she says you cant take a certain item to your apt just leave it.She may eventually let you have it when she has calmed down and accepted the situation.Your over 18 and you have rights....Good luck
2007-03-29 16:29:00 · answer #9 · answered by Zim 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try to sit her down and talk to her about the situation. Maybe she is scared to let you go and this is not about anger. Legally you are allowed to move out and pay your own way. The only way she has control over you would be if you are not able to support yourself financially or if you are not able to take care of your own affairs and she is considered your legal guardian. (If you are mentally not able to do so on your own) Realize that this is a very scary time for parents. We raise kids to be independent and responsible people but when you make the move to do it there is fear on the part of the parent. "What do I do now that they are moving out?" Try to work things out before you go, you don't want to leave the house on bad terms.
2007-03-29 18:49:54 · answer #10 · answered by hr4me 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There's nothing the police can do once you are 18 you're allowed to move out. Your mom can't control you anymore. Sometimes it's hard watching their kids grow up and become independent. She's probably worried about you.
2007-03-29 14:55:36 · answer #11 · answered by Beanie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋