I lost a baby 3 months into my pregnancy. Is the hurt ever going to go away? 2 of my closest friends got pregnant at the same time and it hurts me to talk to them. I burst into tears from time to time with no explanation. I know others have been where I am~ please advise!
2007-03-29 07:09:29 · 14 answers · asked by bkirby_78 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
You have just had a major loss. The hurt never goes away. I miscarried like you and then that time comes around It makes me sad. I can say that the pain does lesson up as time goes on but you will always remember it. So keep yourself busy. Treat this like a loss of a close family memember. Also there must have been something wrong with your baby for your body to reject to carring it. So look at it as could you have handled a sick child? I personally would want a healthy baby this world is cold enough. But again why don't you get a plant to remember your loss by? Or pain your feelings on canvas. Or make some sort of art. :) Hope this helps.
2007-03-29 07:16:43 · answer #1 · answered by Toni V 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Losing my baby at ten weeks was the most soul rending experience I ever had. I cried all the time and at the time I worked in the church nursery and so I saw little babies every week. I thought I was going to go crazy.
What helped the most was the support of two women in my church who had also suffered miscarriage. They really were there for me. There has also been a book just published, sorry I can't remember the title, that's a collection of stories from women who have suffered the loss.
As time passes, it gets a little better each day. I lost my baby in July and by that January I was pregnant again. Having a child really was the thing that did the most to help. I'm so sorry you're going through this. All you can do is to take one day at a time. I'll never forget the little one I lost, but I don't ache like I did.
2007-03-29 14:18:05 · answer #2 · answered by Sharon M 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I was in your position 2 years ago. I was three months pregnant when I lost my first child and now I am enjoying the company of a new person in my life my 2-month old daughter. At the time of my first pregnancy I was going through alot from guy problems to financial stability I didn't even know where my next meal was coming from. So god saw fit to take his little angel back into heaven cause my situation at the time was not fit for bringing a child into this world. So, don't take this as a loss look at your situation like this God is giving you a chance to get yourself together before he allows you to bring a child into this world because he may be preparing you for a more wonderful gift in your future child and he wants you to be prepared. Remember, things happen with in due time when they are supposed too so don't rush things don't feel bad about this experience. Also, congratulate your friends, watch them and learn what to do and not to do as a parent. God is going to bless you with a beautiful baby in due time sooner than you think. Good luck , and keep your head up.
2007-03-29 14:41:34 · answer #3 · answered by diva22 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I had 2 early miscarriages, too. No, the hurt never goes away, the same way any other loss never goes away. But it should, and does, lessen. How long ago was your loss? My 1st was about 8 mos ago, my last (I hope) was 2 mos ago. It helped me a great deal to name my babies and to make them a little token of my love...which I hid in my sock drawer because its achingly personal. Please don't let anyone tell you that you shouldn't be sad or that what you lost was not a baby. The people around me weren't at all supportive, they didn't even acknowledge my loss and I suppose that that's what hurts the most. Keep talking about it and find someone to help you through. Time did help me and will help you, too, but it would be so much easier with someone to listen to your grief.
2007-03-29 14:24:03 · answer #4 · answered by mamasonny 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry for your loss I too have lost a child actually I was 6 days over due this was sept 3, 2000 and No I will never get over her but I did realize later on that things happen for reasons. it may not make sense but everything will soon come together agian. Don't make your friends feel bad be happy for them I had the same situation my clostest was preg at her funeral and didn't want to tell me because it wasen't the right time. don't ever forget like you have to forget your baby because some people say it's not normal , you want to hear weird- I was so crazed form her passing i used to carry her pic on a keychain after while i put it away but it was normal to me i figured if they can put ugly people on keychains why can't my beytiful baby too? I'm talking too much , Hope you get closure in your own way . Danielle
2007-03-30 01:03:50 · answer #5 · answered by Danielle 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, it never fully goes away... However it does get easier. I also had a very early miscarriage before. It is a very painful experience and I did'nt feel as if anyone understood. I believe that the loss of the child actually was a big contribution to the loss of my marriage. It took a while for me to be able to be around babies or pregnant women. I had a niece that got pregnant around the same time and hated being around her. I think it's normal considering what you have just been through. I am very sorry for your loss! Just remeber that you are human and let yourself feel and go through whatever it is you need to..... It's part of healing.
Best wishes!
2007-03-29 14:32:54 · answer #6 · answered by gracie 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I haven't lost a baby but my sister lost her 1 month old daughter. She also miscarried before that. The baby she miscarried would have been the same age as my son and it was really hard for her to be around my baby.
It is painful, but it gets easier. My sister is comforted by knowing that her babies are in Heaven watching out for her and her family.
Maybe you should talk to a grief counsellor or a minister.
I'm reallly sorry for your loss and I'll be praying for you.
2007-03-29 14:22:49 · answer #7 · answered by mamadrama 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I feel for you honey because I have been there. I've had 4 miscarriages and it does get easier. The old saying that time heals all wounds is true. It will fade in time but you won't forget.
As for your friends, be happy for them because your time is coming. Believe me I have been the one pregnant with a friend having a miscarriage and their hearts are breaking for you. They want to enjoy the time they are pregnant but don't want to make it hard for you.
I want to say I am sorry to you but it will get better.
2007-03-29 14:32:00 · answer #8 · answered by Laura H 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have been pregnant 6 times and have had two successful births out of them. If I didn't have God in my life I think it would have been harder to get past it. But Knowing that I will get to see them one day, and knowing that they didn't ever have to go through all of the hard times that we all go through in life. They are happy all of the time, never sick, or sad. Pray for God to help you feel peace.
2007-03-29 15:22:22 · answer #9 · answered by BAMBI S 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Definitely not because i have lost a baby before and it hasnt went away and I think it never will and I am sorry for your loss.
2007-03-29 14:19:06 · answer #10 · answered by forever_together_07 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋