how do i stop beating them up?

Question

yea this kinda sounds stupid and like i am trying to tell people i am strong or suptin but......when i was a little girl my dad would beat me for everything everything i did was wrong he didnt love me he made me do everything for him he wasnt the kinda dad that loves u and adores u and doesnt want anything to happen he was totally the opposite he hated me!....and i was rapped 2 times....and all the pain and beatings i took make me want to give everyone else the same pain i know how to have fun and i am nice at times but my temper goes up so easy and i have already goten into trouble with fighting 4 times this month but thats just the times i got caught by the cops....and when i fight i feel like i just won all the mmoney in the world!....i know i might sound scyho or sumptin but i'm not i really know how to have fun...but i am never happy either i can smile when i want to cry and i can have fun when i want to die with me and the beatings i took gets my temper high!someone help

Answer 1

vitamin b12 can help with your temper and anger management classes.


best of luck

Answer 2

You recognize that there is a problem, that is good. Try to see what gets your temper going way before it gets to the fighting point. There is nothing worse for your future than a record with the cops- people won't feel sorry for you, and they will be prejudiced toward you.

You've had a lot happen to you. You will get this piece of advice a lot, but take it from a psychologist- find a group of women with a problem similar to yours, where they talk about similar problems. Your local women's shelter will be able to refer you.

Answer 3

Sara, this is definitely NOT the place to bring such questions - you will get people who mock you and give you horrible advice about an issue with which you are very vulnerable. Your father was an awful person and you should seek professional help to make sure you stop doing what you are doing - not from some dimwitted teenagers on a message board!

Yahoo answers is great for some things but NOT for this.

Answer 4

First , noooo this does not sound stupid. It sounds like a cry for help!! I hope you are in the position to be able to go see a professional. If you do not have health insurance than they have state funded places that u can go and talk with someone about exactly what u have told us. There is help out there for you and know that you are not alone. You have alot of bottled up hurt and anger and I certainly can see why. I wish when you were a little girl that you had told your teacher or someone that ur father beat u so they could have gotten you help. Also I hope that you reported the rapes to the proper authorities. However,, I fear that you did not out of fear yourself. Go and get help...they can teach you to deal with the bad things that happened to you in ur childhood and they have anger managment classes that is for that. When you go to talk with a doctor or just any one that can help you, you must be honest about everything that happened to you. They also have med's that can help keep u calm. It will take a lot of work but you can do it. First you must learn to love yourself and know that you deserve a better life and prove to that sperm donor that he won't ruin anymore of ur life. There are so many ways to handle ur anger and get rid of it and so many who would love to help you.. I know there will be people who answer your question that can tell you exactely where to go for help and can help u so much more than me. Just please get the help and turn ur life around. My heart goes out to you and you are in my prayers. i wish u the best of luck and i comend you for asking and realizing you need help to get past your horrible childhood. Just know what happened to u as a child was not ur fault nor was it the fault of the ones that u r now taking it out on. I'm glad that u realize that the way u are handling ur anger is wrong and you don't want to beat someone and be like ur father. He was full of hurt and anger too. thats why he did it. as a matter of fact i'll bet that his dad beat him too when he was a child. well you put a stop to this maddness asap ok sara...lots of luck to u

Answer 5

Sara, what you're describing shows that you have some good insight into your behavior, but I really recommend that you talk with a therapist who can help you to work through the abuse you suffered and find healthier ways of dealing with its consequences.
People who were abused tend to split the world into victims and abusers and sometimes see being an abuser as the only way to stop being a victim. They also may hurt others who are less powerful and trusting, like they themselves were as children, as a way to try and master the abuse they experienced by having control over something. Usually they come to feel remorse and guilt over this as they begin dealing with their own abuse and that is a healthy step in recovery.
Others do it as displacement-a less mature way to vent their rage on a safer target than the one they are actually angry at-"the kick the cat syndrome". People who were abused often lack any healthy or alternative models for expressing their rage and resort to violence as it is the only model that they have.
Therapy can help you develop alternative ways to cope and express your rage, and more importantly, it can offer a way for you to work through the feelings and issues that are a result of your past experiences. I've worked with lots of folks with similar problems and I'm guessing that this is just one issue you are having trouble with right now. Please don't hesitate to seek professional help from a therapist as their is no "quick fix" to what you are describing. Don't allow your Father's abuse the power to continue hurting you this way.

Answer 6

sounds to me you need to channel your temper into something else...i would suggest boxing, or karate, but befoer you can do that, you need to manage your temper....maybe you should get in touch with your doctor and get him to refer you to a consellor or psychiatrist...i know it doesnt seem a good thing to do but they can help you to get all the bad stuff off your chest in other ways then beating someone/thing....then while you do that you can take up your karate, boxing or something like that, but if you cant learn to mange your anger you wont be able to use either of those to help calm you.....hope this helps you, and i'm sorry you had an unhappy start....you already made progress by asking for help...the rest from here should be easier

Answer 7

You need help to get back the control on your emotions. Go to www.emofree.com and learn EFT. Also join the Yahoo Group, Reiki_Path and request for Reiki (it is free). If you can afford to buy a medicine, get Rescue Remedy Drops (a Bach Flower Essence) available in healthfood stores or online. Use it when ever you feel your temper rising up and you sense a lack of control. Good luck.

Answer 8

One problem with going to a psychologist is, they will keep a file on you and you'll be labeled as a "problem" person for the rest of your life.
I would avoid the mental health profession at all costs. Your mental health records are NOT private. The police, the courts, the media, and prospective employers will be able to get their filthy hands on this information.
Just keep telling yourself that fighting is not the answer, and hang out with people who care about you. Otherwise, you will end up in jail for a very long time, eventually.

Answer 9

Poor, sweet Sara...there is a saying, that phsycopaths are made, not born..and your type of father, is just the type that causes kids to grow up bitter and hurting...So what is now happening, is that YOU are the one who is trying to self destruct, out of anger, and hurt, and pain...and trying to get even with HIM...you are still suffering...Sweetheart, if you could learn to get the Lord God and Jesus into your life, you could forgive your dad, get a new group of people, because Jesus says, if you don't forgive others, He won't forgive you...Please sweetheart, before you self destruct,...forgive, move on, and don't let your dad's deeds continue to ruin YOUR life, as he goes on with no concience..the Lord will punish him, as God says, Vengence is mine...

Answer 10

I went through a very similar childhood. You can not alter the past, you can control how you react to what happens in your life now. You have to truly WANT to change.
I would advise seeing a doctor.

Answer 11

Sweetie you are not insane. But you do need help. And your dad needs to be in jail. My heart breaks for you. Keep yourself safe, get yourself some help, break the cycle of violence and become the woman you were meant to be.