when my brother and sister in law have a financial problem my mother in law always asking us to solve their difficulty even they already have their own family.which cause my own family to suffer.this is a serious problem that may break our marriage.
2007-03-28 22:10:53 · 9 answers · asked by amygdala 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Tell your mother in law that you need to discuss it privately between the two of you to see if you can help. If you can't then don't. If you can and are willing then do so.
DON'T let yourself get forced into giving money to others that you can not afford to give.
2007-03-28 22:15:49 · answer #1 · answered by celtic_princess 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm confused... does mum want you/yours to give money to siblings? Or, is she thinking hubby may have some leadership skills he share with others?
Also consider that "let no man come between" means if a broken marriage occurs the couple has committed to divorce. It means couples are not to blame people outside the marriage for their own shortcomings and can't blameshift if divorce occurs. Nobody can sign marriage papers other than the couple and marriage officials ....the same goes for divorce papers so that could be one example where divorce would be a bigger no no then in other cases.
2007-03-29 06:03:58 · answer #2 · answered by GoodQuestion 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to your husband about your feelings and when Mummy in law comes calling with these problems, don't participate in the conversation. Just go about your day as you would if she wasn't there. If he wants to listen to it, your husband has that right, but you have to have some say in anything that affects your marriage. If you don't speak up and tell him how you feel and find a viable solution, you are in for trouble.
Don't let her off the hook either. Tell your husband to make it clear to her that dealing with everyone else's problems is causing a problem in his marriage with you and he simply can't bail them out all the time, be it monetarily or emotional support. He has to take care of his family's needs first.
2007-03-29 05:17:48 · answer #3 · answered by kiera70 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let them understand that you have a family of your own to worry about and support - you can't still be dealing with their problems. Besides, if the were adult enough to make the fire - then they should beable to tend to it aswell.
2007-03-29 05:25:30 · answer #4 · answered by CLEVER 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How does ur husband feel about it?
Express your concerns and see how reacts. If it does not bother him then don't interfer. If on the otherhand he shares the same feelings with you then sit down and plan how to react the next time it happens.
Remember, when it comes to mothers inlaw, no matter what ur husband says, win her you win him.
2007-03-29 05:35:25 · answer #5 · answered by mahawi61 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try telling her that you do not have it in your budget to help them. Let her know that it will be that way from now on. If she doesn't understand, that is just too bad. She is being extremely unfair to ask this of your family.
2007-03-29 05:32:00 · answer #6 · answered by Patti C 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
u can try to help ur family memebers but not at the expense of breaking ur own family.
so set the limit and let everybody know that.
2007-03-29 06:47:42 · answer #7 · answered by Kumar 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I guess all that you can say to you MIL is "I'll try". At least these words do not kill the relationship but maybe you need to speak to your hubby if you should.
2007-03-29 05:15:33 · answer #8 · answered by Ashley 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Learn to say NO!!!
2007-03-29 05:13:48 · answer #9 · answered by AdultMale 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋