Sex hurts for me, why?

Question

I have been having sex for quite a few years now, yet it still hurts me every now and then. With my first partner, we were each others first and I was my current partners first. I know everyone will say "Go to a doctor" but I have done that already and they cant help me. I have tried lubricant, but it stings and doesnt help at all. The weird thing is, sometimes I dont hurt and sometimes I do, what could be wrong with me??

Answer 1

One red flag here is that you're saying the sexual lubricants stings. What lubricant are you using? If you getting irritated just from the lubricant alone that is not good. They are different kinds of lubricant from old KY to water-based to the new silicone based. The old KY wears out quickly. Water-based are more slippery and the last for most but silicone based are super slippery (you actually only use a couple of drops) and stay slippery longer. I would suggest you try some of these (you can get them at DrugStore.com (under sexual well-being)). Try the ones you've not tried before. Try them without sex first…. make sure they are not burning or irritating you. It's important you rule that out first.

He did not describe your pain as to whether it was a burning pain or a sudden pain. A sudden pain is usually caused by the tip of the penis hitting the cervix or uterus. Some women have shorter tracks than others so even a small guy can be painful. Other women have longer tracks and sex in any position is always an comfortable.

A burning feeling may come more from vaginal lining. This could come from the lack of lubrication or irritation. This can be little bit more difficult to resolve because what is the irritation? Condoms can cause irritation and so can some lubricants. Stay away from ribbed condoms as these can be irritating. One condom the Trojan extended pleasure (climax control lubricant) has Benzocaine as an ingredient. Its basic idea is to numb the head of the male slow orgasm but it will also numb the vaginal tract.


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Answer 2

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Heyy! Since you are only 15, stick with stuff that would definitely be lots of fun. So, *if* you find a really nice boy close to your own age who is up for a bit of romance or trying stuff out, I would... -- Snuggle with another boy naked, with lots of kissing, making out. -- Jerk each other off (mutual masturbation) -- that's just great fun. -- Oral sex can be really intense and incredible feeling -- both give and receive, then do it mutually at once "69". Don't do anal until you are a bit older and really deeply want to with a guy you love who loves you back. It will be heaps better that way. But anyway, with sufficient preparation, it doesn't have to hurt, and it can feel crazy good. But you have to be "open" to your guy, want him inside you, and use tons of lube. It definitely is cool to penetrate, but one must be extremely gentle and slow, and only go in halfway, not shoving in the whole monster. The only possible problem is if you are with a guy with a huge penis, but even then you can work it out. Anyway, anal can be waaaay intense and amazing, but since that is your last virginity, join it with love and make it mean something. Just have fun for now in the other ways I mentioned. Hugs! EDIT: Where do you live? Laws are different all over. Generally speaking, if both of you are close to the same age, say within two years of each other, you won't be breaking any law at all.

Answer 3

confused,

I am so very sorry to hear this. Sex is truly a gift, and it should always be pleasurable. As the above posts suggests, it's more common than one might think.

Those times when you do not hurt...have you been able to narrow down what differs during those occasions in comparison to those where you experience pain? Could it be that you're not getting adequate foreplay?

Best of luck...I hope you get it figured out.

Answer 4

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Answer 5

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RE:
Sex hurts for me, why?
I have been having sex for quite a few years now, yet it still hurts me every now and then. With my first partner, we were each others first and I was my current partners first. I know everyone will say "Go to a doctor" but I have done that already and they cant help me. I have tried...

Answer 6

There are many things that could be the answer, but generally it all comes down to position. Some positions are riskier then others. I assume you are female? If so, then try and figure out which positions are the ones where you feel pain, and do your best to avoid them. I still have pain occasionally, and I have been having sex for years.. For me, the positions are doggy and missionary, mostly because of hip placement and how deep your partner can go.
Also, try different kinds of lubricants. If ones stings, try another. Not all are the same, and some are a lot gentler than others!
Best of luck :)

Answer 7

well you might have issues with some kinds of lubricants and not others?
your state of mind has a lot to do with how much you may or may not enjoy sex. don't rush it or force the issue know what I mean? when you do have sex,.....make sure its right place, right person, right time ect,.....I would suggest TOTAL relaxation and comfort for you.
Look into latex issues. Are you allergic to latex? Some condoms are latex and some are not....try one that is NOT latex.
Last is urinary tract infections. Ever had one or been told you have one? That would make you VERY sensitive.
Hope that helps,......if not GO BACK to a doctor or Specialist because you will want to have kids someday and this is nothing to fool around with.........

Answer 8

I assume you are in a serious relationship with one person and not sleeping around.

You should be sensitive to each other. From time to time it will hurt, especially for the female. It could come from dryness or body chemistry. If it doesn't happen all the time it could be related to female cycles. Or, with a male, it could come from carrying an erection too long.

There are times when the best way to make love is to use something other than sexual contact and that is something only you and your partner can work out.

If your sexual relationship is more casual than serious that can be difficult. Good luck.

Answer 9

This is going to sound strange, and it may breach on your moral views a little, but I can almost assure you it will work.

You're going to want to find a cylindrical object that resembles a man's phallus. A lot of people recommend wax candles, and I've heard that they work well since they're also not too rigid in their texture. You can use whatever you please (but not the real thing, as it won't retain it's shape and hardness long enough for this).

What you want to do is take a warm bath, and slowly work your candle (or whatever other cylindrical object) inside yourself. Leave it there, and try not to move it unless you're having trouble getting it to stay put. Try this for a few days to about a couple weeks and it should help.

Answer 10

It could be that your are having bouts of urinary tract infection,
your have a medical condition that certain times of the month or year may cause your vaginal walls to become super sensitive. Maybe you have Herpes and you have lesions
that you are unaware of and when you have a outbreak these will swell then pop like a blister and if you do anything during those times it can result in pain. Maybe next time you have this sensation see your Dr. and tell them where you feel it most they may come across the dilemma in a search.