i'm 7 months pregnant...i get really excited when we get things for our upcoming baby...this is our first. i try to sit with my boyfriend and show him what we've got...but it seems like he doesn't care. he helped me put together the crib...but gave up on the other stuff...i asked him to help me with the changing table and dresser but he ignored me and kept messing around on his computer....he doesn't seem interested at all...i asked him what was so important that he couldn't help me and he said "i was surfing my myspace"...what's his problem? what should i do?
2007-03-28 17:50:38 · 11 answers · asked by shana b 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
The only true answer you will get is going to be from him-
I was in a similar situtation, my bf wasn't interested but he slowly came around. It didn't take as long as it is for you. I think you need to a have a heart to heart talk with him. I married my bf. He is a great father and provider for our family.
2007-03-28 18:02:38 · answer #1 · answered by La Dee Da 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is scared and his age does not change that. My brother and his pregnant girlfriend are going through the same thing and it is also his first. Take a candle-lite shower together and calmly tell him how you feel and tell him that you are excited and scared and that you know he is too so why be scared and alone when you can be happy, excited, and scared together!
And reassure him that everything will be alright. If he hasn't heard the heartbeat or seen an ultra sound yet tell your Dr. that his distance is bothering you and ask if he has any suggestions on what will help the 2 of you. My brother never wanted any kids ever until I showed him his baby's 1st picture and pointed out the heart and when I looked up at him he had tears of joy in his eyes. When Daddy's hear and see their baby for the first time rather it been on a screen or in person for the first time that is when all the love and joy will conquer the fear.
2007-03-29 01:13:55 · answer #2 · answered by Jill1012 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't get upset at my answer, but I think you are being hormonal and oversensitive. Does he HAVE to be as excited as you? Maybe it is nerves, maybe he just feels like, "OKAY! Enough already!" From you. I am not trying to be mean to you, but back off him a little bit. Men are not the same as women, and you cannot expect him to be like a TV dad. You will end up driving him crazy and then driving him away. Relax! Take some alone time, too. Maybe concentrate on him a little right now, while you are still a "couple". Once the baby comes you will have very little quiet time alone with him. Give the guy a bit of a break. Don't pester him with the "Don't you love me anymore?" silliness. Your lives are changing forever, and you need to respect his space, as he needs to respect yours. If things seem really bad, talk to a family counsellor. It'll be okay.
2007-03-29 01:03:50 · answer #3 · answered by The Canadian 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know, I had the same problem with my husband. It's not that they aren't interested, it's just that the whole baby reality doesn't really set in for men till the baby is in their arms. Once that happens, you will just see this light in his eyes and know that he really does care soooo much for you and that baby. My husband HATED baby shopping when I was pregnant, but now he hates when I go without him! You have been carrying that little life in your body for months, you already know it personally and have a special bond with him/her that your husband has not had a chance to have. I know it can hurt your feelings, but don't let people tell you that it is "just going to get worse" because it is totally the opposite. His heart will completely change once his little baby is in the world. Keep you head up and congratulations!
2007-03-29 00:59:01 · answer #4 · answered by emileegiles 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think this could be just men, my husband was so excited about kids before we got pregnant, but while i was pregnant he just didn't act that happy about it and i had to push to get the nursery stuff done and he too like the computer, but now that our son is here, he is wonderful, he sits with him and talks to him and they play, he kisses him on the head and tells him how much he is loved, and as it turns out he was just really nervous while i was pregnant, he was worried about being a good dad and providing for us, and getting on the computer or playing his games was his way of dealing with it, but being a man, he didn't want to show it. i promise once that baby comes and he holds him/her, things will change, just try to remember that he is a man!
2007-03-29 00:59:46 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like Daddy is getting nervous. And maybe he just got really horny and had to walk away. That is what my hubby did. LOL And it was a no no in the sex department for us so he would just walk away and I would get mad. LOL I would ask him if he is feeling nervous. Something is bothering him and tell him when you are ready to talk you are all ears. It probably just that he realized he is gonna be a daddy and got scared for a min. But you won't know till he talks to you. And get him talking it will help you understand and not be so sad. Explain that to him.
2007-03-29 00:57:41 · answer #6 · answered by littledueceb 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Men just aren't "into" the nesting thing as much as women. My grandmother used to say "you CAN'T MAKE people behave like you'd like for them to." I hate to tell you but many male humans are like the males of many species - they are REAL INTO the making of the offspring but once the job is done they are off on their own agenda. As a woman and a mother it is in your best interest to regulate the family and the environment into which you will bring your babies. I would suggest in the future you consider the institution of MARRIAGE.
2007-03-29 01:29:53 · answer #7 · answered by ckswife 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Which comes first your bf or your baby?Ignore your boyfriend.He is a selfish piece a **** because you are thinking about more about you gracing motherhood than feeding his lust.A mother should always support her baby and i dont see your case as an exception.
2007-03-29 01:04:02 · answer #8 · answered by James S 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
His problem is just that his problem...If he is not interested now it's only going to get worse...Good luck
2007-03-29 00:55:21 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, I guess he doesn't have to be, it's not like you are married or anything. He can do as he likes, when he likes.... you hve to deal with your choices, girl.
2007-03-29 07:28:25 · answer #10 · answered by Lydia 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋