I have been dating my b/f for 3 years now & he is a great guy... but I have always had this thing for a guy that I have known since I was little. My boyfriend & I fight & argue but I love him & sometimes just feel the need to be free/single. But I dont know what I would do if we do break up. But this other guy I have known since I was 3. we get along great & always have. There's nothing about him that irritates or annoys me in any way...... My emotions are so crazy! who would be better.... a person that has stuck by me for 3 years through thick & thin or a guy who I get along with great?!?!
2007-03-28 17:15:19 · 15 answers · asked by srainriven 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Trust your instincts. There is nothing wrong with having feelings for someone else, but if you're fighting constantly, then maybe what originally got you two together isn't there anymore. I wouldn't just break up with your boyfriend of three years for the "possibility" of going out with this other person unless you weren't happy anymore.
If you do break up, be single for a while just to find out what you DO want. You're not obligated to stay with someone just because of time, the CURRENT situation is why you're with someone, not ANY other reason. Wanting more just means that you're human, but it doesn't sound like you know if the other guy thinks of you romantically. Do you want to risk BOTH relationships. If the answer is yes, then go for it. But the only person that can honestly answer that question for you is YOU.
2007-03-28 17:18:08 · answer #1 · answered by Waddy 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This is something that you need to decide on your own. What does your heart tell you? Sometimes it's hard to decide because you never know what the outcome will be.
Let me tell you my story. Maybe you'll find it helpful, maybe not. Here it is:
When I got married for the first time I thought I should stick to someone that can provide me with a solid future, someone who can definitely take care of me... he was a career man and good looking too. Perfect. Right?
Wrong. 2 yrs later we got divorced, we fought a lot and he didn't want a family either... he just changed so much after we got married. Well, finally I ended up marrying my best friend from college. Who was a fun guy, not so good-looking, a little goofy (not husband material - I thought). But he's always been good at heart and my soul-mate. Now, I couldn't be happier. We have a family and he supports and loves us very much. After 8 yrs. we are still in love.
2007-03-29 00:29:33 · answer #2 · answered by Lexi 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As long as there is no ring on your finger you are free to see anyone you like. Do not lie to your present boyfriend but tell him you wish to see others and would also like to see him. This may motivate the boyfriend to committ to you further. As for the other guy, give him a chance he could be the one you are meant to be with. If you have been with the boyfriend for 3 years and you are not engaged this probably is telling you that you have gone as far in this relationship as you can. By engaged I mean you have the ring and the date is set and it is less than 1 year away. When you meet the right one at the right time you will know in a month and so will he.
2007-03-29 00:22:52 · answer #3 · answered by D. S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It often happens that you fancy one/more person while you are in a relationship. But you should consider this: you are finding this person great because you are not in a relationship with him and hence you are not closely attached to him (as you are with your bf). On a closer look even moon has spots, so does your bf and so does this fantasy guy. Fighting is part of life and so is making up. I wouldn't suggest coming out of a steady relationship for a fantasy which will again turn into a same reality.
Having said that, no harm in having the fantasy. Just keep it under the lead.
2007-03-29 00:29:44 · answer #4 · answered by Sean 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well...first, I as well am in a relationship of four years. I love him as well, but I do always have attraction to other people, it's human nature. The thing is, your boyfriend knows you on a whole different level than your friend, he is your lover. When you are in a relationship w/ someone, you will always have arguments and annoyances w/ that person, but that is because you are on an intimate level. Your friend is not at that level w/ you, but I promise, if you were to be w/ your friend on an intimate level, you would find problem and things that annoy you about him. I would say go w/ your heart, if you can't be w/ out your bf, then stay w/ him...
2007-03-29 00:23:11 · answer #5 · answered by elle 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Right now neither. You said it yourself - your emotions are so crazy! See you do not pick your boyfriend this way. How are you committed yet not. When you are committed to someone your emotions are not available for consideration of another. Just are not. Sounds you are shopping when you already have the boyfriend. Try taking a time out to get yourself together. That is only fair to the one you are stringing along.
2007-03-29 00:22:58 · answer #6 · answered by Healthy Lifestyle Geek 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The grass is always greener....
Sure nothing this other guy does annoys you...YET. If you ever break up with your boyfriend, make a pact with yourself if will never be over another man. Those relationships typically disappoint you. If this guy wasn't in the picture, would you even be thinking of what annoys you with your boyfriend?
If you don't want to be with him, make a move to be single and then date the other guy later.
2007-03-29 00:20:23 · answer #7 · answered by Smooch The Pooch 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You already know what you have, you dont know what you will be getting...if you have a great guy...hold on to him tight...they are very hard to find and even harder to keep!!
this other guy you havent dated for 3 years so of course he doesnt irritate or annoy you..i think you just have lust for this guy not love...what you have is love...trust me, hold on real tight.
2007-03-29 00:20:30 · answer #8 · answered by Evie 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, it doesn't matter if he has been there through thick and thin, if you are unhappy and know you want to be with this other guy, it's not fair to your boyfriend, you need to leave him and allow yourself to follow your heart, cause what you want might make you cry and what you need might pass you by if you don't catch it.
2007-03-29 00:22:08 · answer #9 · answered by Kbella 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
r u happier with your boyfriend of three years or with the other guy? go with your heart! i have had guys that were there for me through the most horrible days of my life and i am soon to be marrying a different guy! dont feel like you are obligated to him becuz u have been together for a while!
2007-03-29 00:22:02 · answer #10 · answered by natalee anne 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋