I'm currently in a 1-yr relationship with my boyfriend I love dearly. My best guy friend and I have fallen for each other and he is the perfect match for me. My current boyfriend is my complete opposite (opposites attract) but he lacks ambition and I struggle to picture myself with him in the future. My best friend has goals and direction in life, is intellegent, and we share a unique bond that is amazing. I can't talk to my boyfriend because he can be really dense and only cares about sports and poker, but nothing deep or thought-provoking, as I do with my best friend. I love him and care so much for him but he really isn't the right one for me. I LIVE with him and have 6 more months on our apt lease. It is devastating for me to think about breaking up with him but I feel that I can be happier with my guy best friend. I want to be with both of them, but obviously that is impossible. I don't wanna hurt any of them but I HAVE to make a decision fast! I need advice! Please help!
2007-03-28 16:26:22 · 5 answers · asked by undecid3d 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I am going through the same problem right now and I think what you should do is sit down with your current boyfriend and tell him that you don't think he is the right one for you and that you love him but you feel it is best if you two moved on in life! Tell him that it is not all his fault and that you do care about him and you don't want to see him hurt but you just don't think that he is the one! try to lay it on him really gently because you have probably been in this relationship a long time! this is going to hurt him a lot but you must open up to him because if you keep hiding the fact that you are in love with your best friend then things are going to be even worst when you end up breaking up with him about two years from now! just get it over with! The longer you wait to dump him the more hurt he will be inside when you do it! just get it over with but be nice about it!
As for this other guy I think you two seem to have a lot in common. I think that he sounds like a really sweet guy that would be there for you and that seems to really like you back! I say go for this one because you only get a chance to go out with a guy like this in a million years. Take this chance you will be so much happier when you are with the one you realized was there for you standing by you side the entire time and you didn't even know it! take my advise!
I think if you really feel this strongly about this other guy you need to let him know! you better make your choice before they both disappear and you are left with no one! I hope what you do ends up working for you and that the choice you make you wont regret in the future! Good luck i hope you make the right choice! Don't regret it if you do break up with him! If he is off playing sports and not paying attention to you then he just doesn't know what he is missing! Well i wish you good luck!
Brandon
2007-03-28 16:49:50 · answer #1 · answered by Missy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well breaking up is hard to do, I don't know how much you have invested in this relationship but, if your current boyfriend has no ambition and you don't picture yourself with him in the future you already know the answer. If your best friend feels the same way about you, you may need to talk to your landlord and explain the situation about the two of you breaking up, and see if you can get out of the lease. Also, if there are no children involved this can be a clean break. The only thing you have to ask yourself is if you are attracted to your boyfriend because the intimacy is great but everything else sucks! If it is all about the intimacy then you need to let that go because when your in love with someone and you are compatible, and reaching towards the same thing in life you need to be able to allow yourself the happiness you deserve. Before you get stuck with kids and a man with no ambition that will not help you reach your true potential. The best thing about guy friends being your best friend is that they truly love you for who you are not for what you are doing for them. Last but not least pray to your higher being for direction in this matter, an answer will come to you.
2007-03-28 17:10:25 · answer #2 · answered by Kbella 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is definitely best to decide one way or the other NOW. It sounds like you have already decided on the friend. I know how it can feel when faced with a situation like this, but I PROMISE, only negative will come from keeping this from your boyfriend. You have to:
A) Completely cut it off with the best friend and give it your best shot with your current guy - even if just for a certain time you decide on in advance, or
B) Tell your boyfriend that you cannot be with him anymore right away, lease be damned! That stuff can always be figured out somehow.
Also, I had a similar choice, went with the ambitious one and have not regretted it for a second!!
2007-03-28 16:39:03 · answer #3 · answered by roobee 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I feel that was once well. Tell her that being Perfectly Blind for her makes you do matters just a grown guy does while he's in love. And now you are not able to in view that you're misplaced with out no imaginative and prescient.
2016-09-05 19:54:52 · answer #4 · answered by picone 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
JUST BREAK WITH HIM UP PERIOD. DO NO WHINE AND MOAN ABOUT DO IT AND MOVE ON WITH YOUR LIFE.
2007-03-28 16:31:38 · answer #5 · answered by Cavaillon 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋