If you have *any* doubts about a relationship should you end it?

Question

People say to follow your instincts. Are doubts instincts. Nothing to base the doubt on.....just a feeling.
Should you end a relationship if you have that little doubt feeling?!

--When I think about him, I'm like "Hmm....he's not that great, but a nice guy. Maybe I'm making a wring decision by being with him, and continuing in this relationship....."
--But when I'm with him it's as if everything is perfect, and we were made for each other.
I don't get "butterflies in my stomach" or anything, but I want to scream "ily!!" a lot.
What is this about?

Answer 1

Maybe its not doubt but disappointment. Not really in him, but in LOVE. Love is exaggerated in movies, books, and by bragging women that want others to think their life is perfect. Love is not perfect, men are not perfect, and once you settle down it can be humdrum. The thrill of "falling in love" goes away, so you may feel different after a while. That is why people break up so much. They want that rush of falling in love again, so they move on. and On, and On. Familiarity breeds contempt, is the saying. But feeling at home, relaxed, and comfortable around a man is what it is really about. Think about it.

Answer 2

Think about what your previous relationships were like.

If you had some horrible experiences like most of us, then you have formed some new insight (negative opinions) about guys in general. You have probably brought these into the new relationship.

The danger in that is 1) All guys don't fit this category as you are finding out, and 2) in order to keep your new-found insight, you can 'sabotage' a relationship with YOUR negative thinking.

You seem to be doing that now. If he isn't doing anything to give you doubts, and you admitted that everything is perfect when you are around him, then start appreciating what you have! Don't let the past cause you to lose a guy that makes everything perfect.

That's not doubt you're feeling. That is insecurity.

All the best.

Answer 3

Instincts get more accurate with age and experience.

Butterflies and having a 'perfect' relationship don't mean it's right. Butterflies are really just sexual tension (important, but they fade even in the best relationships) and 'perfect' is only for the movies.

Are you ready to make a life long commitment? What kind of relationship would you like to have with this guy? What are the reasons you are with him? Those are the questions to ask yourself so you can learn what your instincts mean and what you should do.

Answer 4

I wouldn't jump ship just yet.You may want to take some time and re-evaluate your feelings. Doubts sometimes can disguise themselves as boredom. Not in all cases but some.Ask yourself some questions. When did I start feeling this way? Anything unusual happen between us? Is it the same old,same old? Doubts do get you thinking,thats for sure,but there IS a reason for them.

Answer 5

if there is a doubt than yes you need to end it. i think what your doing is that your feeling sorry for him and you don't want to hurt his feelings so your finding reasons to stay with him when in reality thats not what you really want. i think its best if you either took a break from him to see how you feel without him.. tell him you need some space to figure some things out. but, no matter what the situation is if your having doubts about anything that means you should leave it alone.

Answer 6

Girl look i just went throught that exact situation so i know what you mean but i found my answer already. i just though why brake his heart if he did nothing wrong. he makes you happy,so it wouldn't be fair to him.who cares if hes not just perfect.noboby is perfect! if your in the situation where everyone else is telling you hes sorta strange and that u 2 deffinetly werent meant to be then just ignore them and you need to have fun be yourself,dont worry about anything that may not be great with him.Just go with the flow and let him be himself.thats exactly what i did and it has been the best year of my life!

Answer 7

Ask yourself why you're with him in the first place. If it's just a fling or something like that, it's probably best to end it. Otherwise, talk with him. Find out how you both feel about things. If it feels like you're really good friends, then stay with him.

Good luck!

Answer 8

If you feel you want MORE out of your relationship then bail out and seek someone else.
However, you do seem a little flaky yourself.

Answer 9

End it!
Trust the gut. If you don't get butterflies in the belly......thats a sure sign.
:)

Answer 10

depends if the doubts are big or small