how can i change my views about romance?

Question

I am indian n female btw--which puts things tht i am going to say into context. the way i was brought up, this awkward shame hung around the concept of 'love'. It was some thing i saw in films from an early age and was an 'awkward nonsense' in my mind, maybe because that is my parents view of it. i'm 17 now and have never had any romantic incident in my life. I got into the bad habit of watching **** when i was 11-12 then i outgrew it. but because my whole impression of love is what i see in films, read in books and watched in **** films, i never understand how people in real life fall in love. I always look at couples and think that how can two non-good-looking people fall in love. I always feel embarassed for girls who are not good-looking and who are dressing up and so enthusiastic about their bfs. i just think they are losers. i just seem to have this fixation that love is all about looks and so is sex. How can i break out of this mindframe? or is the mindframe actually realistic?

Answer 1

Changing yourself would chnage your view.But thats true that most of the love is all about looks and so is sex.But we would understand it when you grew by age.

Answer 2

The mindframe is not realistic and u should breakout of this mindframe. Romance and love is free and not just for the good looking but for all average beings and even animals and the birds. Many a times, good looking people are lousy lovers. Love needs a large heart not looks.

Answer 3

If you want to break out of this mindframe, ma'am, you'll first have to start from scratch and wipe out such negative thoughts. Your views in romance have nothing to with your attitude,however. It's a deep seated fear in being vulnerable to somebody elses' emotions,which you may or may not have realised by now. Movies,books and pornos give a "Mills and Boons" version of love on steroids, hence the impression that sex and lust is all there is in it. But there is a difference between lust and love. You want to see real love,real affection - try looking at an old couple. If you look hard enough, you will find what you seek, and wil then perhaps what it means to be in love - it's happiness, its sacrifice, everything.

Answer 4

i guess the only way to change your whole perspective would be to fall in love - it's a state where no one can tell you that you're in love, you just know it... the mindframe you're in isn't realistic in my opinion... you were brought up in a surrounding that made you believe that love is all about looks...
i've known couples who have studied with each other for years and not felt a thing... the moment they leave their institution, they fall in love - why didn't they fall in love earlier? they could have spent so much time together..! that too the guy and the girl weren't the best of friends... so my point is love is something that usually happens when you least expect and towards someone you least expect... but the main thing about love (in 100% percent of the cases) is, it's soooooo magical...

Answer 5

u hadnt fallen in love and hadnt got any real life loves to watch or hear, it doesnt mean that u dont know anything about love. And by watching movie loves, it doesnt mean again that u know everything abt love.
I am 21 m . still i too didnt fall in love. but I can still feel it, see it, enjoy it. only sex and wrong affairs comes by looks , attraction and bodily chemistry . love comes from heart,soul. Jus watch ur parents , they way they take care towards each other, secure each other, doing things which they like and accepting things jus for the sake of their spouse, everything even their anger towards each other depicts, demonstrates love.
But anyway u dont have to change ur views. When u fall in love it will automatically chane u and ur odd views.

Answer 6

Why do you feel for change your views on romance?Neither it is realistic nor Utopian.Hence you have to a practical view of romance.