I am a 43 year old divorced Christian woman. I met a man from e-harmony who is kind,gentle and caring.The problem is that he is bi-polar,is missing a toothe and drank 5 drinks even though he said he was an alcoholic. I am lonely and feel some what desperate as I get older. Should I settle so I don't have to be alone or keep waiting to find the right one?
2007-03-28 07:47:50 · 6 answers · asked by Lori O 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
NO!! Whatever you do, do not settle......God will send you someone soon. Keep your head up and the right one will come to you. Good luck and hope this helps.
2007-03-28 07:51:38 · answer #1 · answered by ~(*) Loving Life (*)~ 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You said this guy is kind, gentle and caring but is missing a tooth, and had 5 drinks. The missing tooth can always be fixed, the 5 drinks were either from him being nervous, or he has a drinking problem. A man with a drinking problem is not a good choice for any one. It is sad he has not gotten help for this for as you say he appears to be a nice person. The decision can only be yours as to what you are willing to settle for. No one should be with someone just out of loneliness. You should be with someone who you are happy with. Hey 43 is not old, even so, at any age my advice still stands. Best of luck to you!
2007-03-28 16:15:24 · answer #2 · answered by pictureshygirl 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't feel that you should settle with this person that obviously isn't for you!! You deserve better! Don't make a decision that you will most likely regret in the future. Instead, keep dating!! The right guy will come along!
Update your e-Harmony profile (I assume there's a profile) and be more specific. Let potential daters know that you are Christian and don't approve of heavy drinking. Make your values known so that you will attract the type of people that will best fit with you.
Then, join some extra activities at church, Christian dating sites, etc. There are so many options!! Whatever you do, don't settle! That's not fair to either of you!
2007-03-28 14:53:52 · answer #3 · answered by Sharon 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He seems like a nice guy-- he is kind, gentle, and caring-- which is hard to find in a man. Maybe there is a link between his drinking and him being bi-polar, an escape perhaps or a way of coping. You have to decide how you feel about him and whether these things will bother you.. Who said you are settling? Society? Don't let what other people think affect your decision to be with someone.
As far as not having a tooth, that shouldn't matter if you love him. As we age, we lose our teeth, our hair, we gain weight... that soundn't change our love for that person.
2007-03-28 14:57:53 · answer #4 · answered by I carry your heart with me... 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
No, don't settle. That definitely is not an option. If you settle it will eventually go wrong some way, some how. You're only 43...you have plenty of time to enjoy life and have fun. We all love and want companionship but settling is not companionship...that's just a "filler".
2007-03-28 14:59:38 · answer #5 · answered by S. Marie 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's always better to be alone than to be with the wrong one. It would be misery to meet the right one when you're stuck with the wrong one. Hold on a little longer!
2007-03-28 14:52:49 · answer #6 · answered by Fierce Lioness 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋