My girlfriend gets upset everytime I say something about her and ex in the same sentence. I have to talk to my ex about our children. Which she understands. I want her and my ex to be able to be friends but it doesn't seem to be happening. She is cordial to her, but that is it. She says that I compare her to my ex to much. I just don't want to go through the same things with her that I did with my ex. I called my ex and invited her and her boyfriend on a weekend with us. I just don't get it. Help me understand.
2007-03-28 07:40:23 · 15 answers · asked by PJ 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
its not nice..and it makes her feel bad... put yourself in her shoes... could her ex do what your ex is doing and would you be ok with it?♥
2007-03-28 07:44:39 · answer #1 · answered by just peachy 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry but it just doesn't always work out the way you want it to. It's uncomfortable to be put in that situation. Having a relationship pertaining to the children is no problem, but to expect her to be best friends with the ex...not going to happen. The ex was a past love, past relationship and the new woman doesn't want to be compared. Be happy that she is cordial and does what she needs to do for the kids. There really is no reason for them to be friends outside of holding the same interests for the children.
2007-03-28 07:48:43 · answer #2 · answered by S. Marie 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I will tell you one thing. Whenever my gfs would compare me to any of there ex's i would hit the roof. Im not your ex's and I am nothing like your ex's. One thing are you comparing the two. If you are stop it and maybe then your new gf and your ex would be able to get along.
DO NOT COMPARE THEM.They are different in many ways. Do ever do that to anyone you know
2007-03-28 07:51:36 · answer #3 · answered by danielp1962 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why should you compare her to your ex? I bet like every other woman she'd like to think that you're over with her and that she's the only one for you. You should be grateful that she's cordial to her. And inviting her for the weekend even with her boyfriend may be just too much.
2007-03-28 07:49:07 · answer #4 · answered by fanciful me 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Never compare a girl with your ex it can make her feel hurt because of who your comparing her with vbecause to her it may feel that you could still love your ex and feel a connection and inviting your ex well that is stupid as it really opens up the question does he still fancy her?
2007-03-28 07:53:23 · answer #5 · answered by Cherryade 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your girlfriend gets upset because you have no right to compare her to your ex. What she is thinking that you are with her--accept her for who she is. PLUS she doesn't want to share you with your ex. Your ex has moved on and so should you. You don't need to include her in everything that you do with your girlfriend. Be careful before you wind up losing your new gal.
2007-03-28 07:49:28 · answer #6 · answered by Miss J 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How is this so hard for you to understand? She's jealous of your ex, and your continued closeness with your ex. Mostly because you continue to see her in romantic terms ("my ex-girlfriend/lover") instead of purely platonic terms ("my female friend").
It's unreasonable to expect her to be friends with your ex, or to want to vacation with her, or to be happy about you spend a great deal of time with your ex. She's worried that you still have feelings for your ex, that your ex is more important in your life than she is.
And she does have a point - you are comparing her to your ex. You "don't want to go through the same things with her" that you did with your ex - subconsciously you're always comparing her to your ex, thinking she's going to do the same things - and for the same reasons - that your ex did. You need to recognize that your current girlfriend is a new person, with different motives and needs. And her needs include a recognition that she is important and unique to you... for herself, not just in terms of "better or worse" than your ex.
Cancel this couples weekend with the ex, and just go with your girlfriend. Spend time seeing her as her own person, and leave the past behind you. Reassure her that your friendship with your ex is purely platonic, and that you love her (your girlfriend).
(and if it helps, think about this way; every time you mention your ex, think about your current girlfriend mentioning a sex stallion ex-boyfriend of hers, who was better endowed than you... and you'll be able to appreciate the insecurity and frustration she is experiencing.)
2007-03-28 08:06:21 · answer #7 · answered by teresathegreat 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ummm thats wrong ok first off she doesnt wanna hear about your ex at all ,EVER.she can deal with the kid issue and thats it.Why would you even want her to be freinds with your ex?I think your not over her yet and your trying to still have her be part of your life so that maybe one day you 2 can get back together
2007-03-28 07:45:57 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
that is common. purely attempt to look previous that and inspect the guy, no longer the song he performs or the blouse he wears. purely save relationship him by using fact who's unquestionably-known with what is going to ensue! He may even see the lady he enjoyed exchange into actual in front of him the on an identical time as time!
2016-12-08 13:11:43 · answer #9 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Because it shows that you are still thinking about your ex! Forget what happened with your ex! Don't make your baggage her problem. It's just rude and immature.
2007-03-28 07:53:22 · answer #10 · answered by SomeGirl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It makes your wife feel insecure when you compare her to your ex,she shouldn't have to deal with your ex.Keep contact with your ex only concerning your kids.
Your wife is your main priority now,make her feel she is the only one.
Damn sure i wouldnt want a weekend with my husbands ex
2007-03-28 07:47:14 · answer #11 · answered by tuppenybitz 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋