Should I leave my boyfriend?

Question

We have been together for 3 years.
He tells me that he doesn't think he loves me b/c he doesn't feel it. Everytime we get into an argument he blames it on me and ends up telling me that I will end up alone (w/out him, breakup). He has been hitting me, pushing, pulling my hair, whenever he get mad at me. He says he will never change being rude until I change my behavior. I have been trying to improve myself but he still complaining. The other day we were playing around and I barely touched his face and he ended up punching me which made me fall straight to the tile floor, I almost broke my jaw bone. The next day after I called him crying, he apologized and came over to take care of me. Now I don't know what to do? I don't think I make him happy and I feel like he just steps all over me. Should I leave? We have been in counseling for about 4 months, the relationship has improved somewhat but he just doens't want to stop being rude. He always blames it on me and my behavior.

Answer 1

Just asking this question is enough to say "YES" leave him!

Answer 2

Are you kidding me?? No, wait. To be absolutely fair, I recognize that there are three sides to every story- your version, his version, and the truth. Simply because I know women who intentionally antagonize their men either to see how far they can push to get a reaction or for attention, I cannot automatically take your side. There have been times when I've witnessed arguments that a woman started and thoughout the argument was the antagonizer. There are times when a woman seems as if she's asking to get hit, if no more than to calm down.

If none of what I said applies to you and your boyfriend is just abusive, you need to get out of the relationship. Counseling will not make it better. Time will not make him better. The very first time he got aggressive with you, you should've either hit him back to let him know that you had no fear of him or let him know that you wouldn't tolerate that type of treatment towards you. At that point, you may have been able to salvage the relationship. He may have developed some type of respect for you. But because you've let it go on to this point, there's no reason for him to take you seriously. Going to counseling only suggests that you can't handle his aggression, giving an overly aggressive man fuel to be even moreso.

Aside from all that, him telling you he no longer loves you because he doesn't feel it, that should be reason alone to leave him and end the relationship. If you were confused before, that statement should clear things up for you. Women who tolerate abuse, usually at least feel that the guy loves them or they wouldn't act that way. You guy told you that he doesn't love you. So why would you tolerate abuse from him? I know you probably love him but you have to love yourself more. You have to have enough respect for yourself where you say and mean that you won't be disrespected in your relationship.

Answer 3

I did not read all of this after AI read the first few liones I KNOW what you should do...RUN..no one is to hit anyone..ever!! AND why would you allow that to happen to you? You must not like/love yourself...sad..get some therapy and learn how to and stay away from guys like him...or you will never be happy! AND he says you will end up alone cause he doesn't want you but he doesn't want anyone else to and he is trying to make you want to be with him....DON'T do it and don't believe him..you have some smarts if you asked for help so do the right thing and RUN do not even be a friend of his..ever

Answer 4

I would leave him. But if you want to keep getting bruised and beaten up the go ahead, stay with him. Its all your decision. These are hard decisions to make and you do need to sort this out between the two of you. Dont let others make your mind up for you, do it yourself. GOOD LUCK.
If you stay with him he will feel he has all control over you and he does not. He will keep beating you unless you do something about it. I say take action now do not wait. Cause this can lead to more serious stuff than broken bones and hearts.
MAKE sure your parents know about this also. He could get in big trouble over this and he deserves it so get help from parents and friends. Your parents will know what to do. Ok.

Answer 5

BAIL OUT! He blames you, meaning he accepts no responsibility. HE HITS YOU? Forget it! Such an abusive relationship won't ever improve no matter how much therapy you attend. When a guy feels he has to push and shove a woman around to establish his authority and stuff, that's inside of him and well rooted and he will continue to do it in one way or another. BAIL OUT! You have already wasted three years and I'm willing to bet you don't even have the guts to tell the therapist everything because you're intimidated that your partner won't like it. If it hasn't happened already, you are going to become dependent on that kind of treatment from him. Don't do this to yourself, there's no future in it.

Answer 6

Let me tell you this:

If you didn't get the hint that he's abusive now, you'll never get that hint. I'm surprised you stayed in the relationship after he put his hands on you like that. How long into the relationship did he touch you that way for the first time? Seeing the description you gave of him, he's abusive and controlling. He's playing on his flaws to make them look like they are yours. You got to be smarter than that. If you know he has problems being "handsy," you need to leave. I honestly cannot believe you asked the question of, "Should I leave?" If the bruises on your body and the mental scarring didn't get to you, as much as I hate saying this, you two deserve each other.

One more thing. Stay in it any longer, YOU WILL DIE.

Answer 7

Are you seriously asking the question?
Not only should u leave u should call the cops on him!
If a man hits you once he will always hit you, forget counseling for the both of you, get some for your self nd try to put the coward behind you!

Answer 8

To be honest YES leave him... It's for your own good. He is getting use the fact that he can hit you and he can do it more and more and realize that you'll do nothing about it. I rather you leave and be safe than end up being hurt really bad. Imagine if he really did break your jaw bone??? What's next a broken arm?!! He will continue to do this... It's a habit he formed... Be safe and take care!!!

Answer 9

Rude what are you talking about him being rude. He is hitting you!!!! Run as fast as you can as far as you can away from him. No one deserves to be abused. He should be in jail for this. I have a girl that works for me and her husband hit her so bad that he fractured her cheek bone and now she is permanently disfigured. Might I add that she lives in a trailer and has a crappy car and can't afford anything because she is paying off his debt. Is this what you want for yourself? Get away from him and stay away. It's not you it's him and he won't change. Good Luck and Take Care

Answer 10

hell yah leave. u should have been long gone. the first time he hit u ushould of left and never looked back. b/c thats not a real man he's a little boy. u need to tell the police and have him locked up. this is a good relationship to be in get out before u need up dead or in the hospital. find u a real man

Answer 11

is his name Manuel? just kidding

That sounds exactly what i went through with an ex....I could only take so much, he had a gun and would threaten to kill himself when I would want to leave, to tell the truth i wish he had done it.

He is selfish, manipulative, and i bet he cheats on you. He is not going to change.. and you wont leave untill things get really bad or you have had enough.

Doesnt matter what anyone tells you on here you still will be with him...You know that this is not good for you...you are not a dum girl...just maybe a slow learner.