ago to finish my college degree before his ETS. I recently found out that he and our old neighbor had a baby a month ago, she was pregnant before I left apparently and i didnt know anything was going on. Yeah call me dumb or blind....Anyways, what can or should i do in regards to him and his career. I certaintly cant let him get away with this.
2007-03-27 13:47:22 · 18 answers · asked by kristina e 1 in Politics & Government ➔ Military
Gosh, I am so sorry this happened to you. I have a friend who turned her husband in. Unfortunately, he only got a slap on the wrist, but at the same time, it probably will always be on his record. This might keep him from receiving certain merits in the military, even if he isn't quickly punished for his behavior.
Infidelity is so rampant all over (especially in the military) and after the Clinton scandal the military isn't as strict on it as they used to be. Even with this in mind, do contact his officer above him. The squeaky wheel always gets the oil. The more noise you make about it, the more likely something will be done.
Other than that, good riddance to him, you deserve better! I hope and pray you can come out of this victorious in the end with a Brad Pitt look alike on your arm who is faithful and loving to you in the future. ;)
2007-03-27 14:03:55 · answer #1 · answered by Ms. Chick 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
A few years ago, the Army stopped really punishing people for adultry unless it was flagrant and an embarrasment to the Army. Basically, an E5 having sex with someone other than his wife doesn't qualify.
The Army brought it's policy into the current century-- nowhere else can you be punished for adultry.
BUT-- if you wanted to make his life miserable, you could still contact his commander.
I posted a link to an article -- but here's the main extract:
"To constitute an offense under the UCMJ, the adulterous conduct must either be directly prejudicial to good order and discipline or service discrediting. Adulterous conduct that is directly prejudicial includes conduct that has an obvious, and measurably divisive effect on unit or organization discipline, morale, or cohesion, or is clearly detrimental to the authority or stature of or respect toward a servicemember. Adultery may also be service discrediting, even though the conduct is only indirectly or remotely prejudicial to good order and discipline. Discredit means to injure the reputation of the armed forces and includes adulterous conduct that has a tendency, because of its open or notorious nature, to bring the service into disrepute, make it subject to public ridicule, or lower it in public esteem."
2007-03-27 13:58:27 · answer #2 · answered by kelannde 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I am sorry that your spouse stepped out on you. The military has a very high divorce rate. Same with cops. File for divorce, get some alimony, then find someone who is worthy of your company. This is the very reason that for the 22 plus years that I have been in the military I have not had a serious girlfriend or get married. My life of bouncing around the world just wasn't conducive to a relationship. I saw a lot of cheating on both sides of the family and I knew that I didn't want to have that concern on top of the ones I already had. So my advice to anyone wanting to join the military: stay single! You will have a lot less heartburn.
2007-03-28 10:11:18 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm so sorry this happened to you.
Like Kelannde said, you can bring it to his CO's attention, but don't expect adultery by itself to get him into any real trouble.
I once knew a First Sergeant who took his girlfriend to an Army ball and introduced her as such, including to the brass! Did he think that everyone would forget he was married? You can't get much more flagrant than that, especially considering the example he was setting for his junior enlisted personnel who were also at the ball. Even with him, they waited eight months until he committed another UCMJ violation before "suggesting" he retire. If he hadn't done anything else wrong, he'd most likely still be in.
2007-03-27 14:04:22 · answer #4 · answered by retired military wife 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Here's how it works...YES, adultry is punishable by UCMJ standards (article 134). However, it is entirely up to the commander's discretion on how to pursue this matter. If his commander is the family oriented, morality type, he may opt to pursue punishment as far as court-martial (sentence of brig time, loss of rank and pay, and or Other Than Honorable dismissal from the service). On the other hand, if his commander feels that this warrants a slap on the wrist, then he may get loss of rank. And if his commander is the ol' school type and is a dog himself, he may turn a blind eye. Nevertheless, if it's retribution your seeking, then it does'nt hurt to give his commanding officer or preferrably 1st Sgt or Sgt Major a buzz. It's the only way you'll know, either way, you will end up stirring up a dust storm in his world. Good luck to you.
2007-03-27 14:33:30 · answer #5 · answered by go gadget53 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If you can find proof, he can get an article 15, if you don't mind loosing a little money from his paycheck (if you to are still living together(, he will loose his rank and become E-4 and he will get extra duty. A DNA test will prove the baby is his and that may mean, still more money because she may request child support from him, and the Army will make sure he pays, if she gets a court order for it. Or divorce him and get the alimony, and if you have kids, the child support to. Just remember, you won't get the Army benefis anymore, the PX and the commisarry and the Tricare.
2007-03-27 14:56:54 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
First of all, trusting your spouse is not dumb or stupid, giving them second chances tends to be. Anyway, adultery is a serious crime according to the U.C.M.J. - uniform code of military justice. You can notify his commanding officer, which could and generally does result in loss of rank and/or forfeiture of pay and allowances. Wether you should do this is entirely up to you, if you don't have any kids by him, you might consider yourself lucky you found now and not have wasted any more time with the jerk. Whichever you choose, I do wish you all the best. I was former Marine sergeant, sorry to say I saw this same thing happen quite frequently.
2007-03-27 14:05:23 · answer #7 · answered by Gerald F 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Go as far as your concience will allow you. While my wife didnt have a baby I did catch her cheating on me (after I separated from the military). We were both in the military. But instead I went and got the paperwork ready packed all my stuff (being in the military I never really kept much around) gave her the paperwork to sign and left without as much as a goodbye. Recently she has been trying to get a hold of me to appologize and "be friends". But I just moved on with my life as if she weren't there. I cant say that getting back at cheaters is a great thing but a year later when they call asking to "be friends" again it sure is satisfing to say sure whatever and blow them off as if they werent even in your life to begin with. Good luck to you.
2007-03-27 13:59:04 · answer #8 · answered by phnxfrhwk 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It is a crime if you are active military punishable through court Marshall, This would probably resort in a demotion of rank unless he has a history of breaking conduct witch would go further.
If you have children together be careful of consequences they will suffer. Emotional and financial.
Don't do out of revenge . Holding some one accountable and revenge are 2 different things.
Usually it comes up in the divorce anyhow.
2007-03-27 14:25:40 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
File for divorce and move on. You could probably get him in some stuff by calling his company commander, but why bother? Let the woman he impregnated have the loser while you go find a winner.
Good luck.
2007-03-27 13:58:07 · answer #10 · answered by chuck_junior 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋